Kimmy's corner
Hello everyone, I'm Kimberly.
I'm starting this thread to share some thoughts and writings and also as a way to keep in touch with my friends from both Teen and Adult zones.
I hope everyone is having a good time.
@Kimmkimm
Hello Kim, I am here to show you one of the images I have captured, using Long-focus. It is not much, but it is a start. I do not possess a tripod. I use things like books to keep the phone still. Here you go:
This is our planet's moon. I did not see any stars today, I also do not know about the capabilities of the camera in my phone. I look forward to your response.
May the force be with you.
i forgot to mention that photos with more seconds are brighter.
@CaptainRex
Taking photos of the moon is difficult because they rather seem like a bright dot in the sky. You need a good optical zoon (digital zoom may work as long as the zoom is not pixelated or grainy). Also, the moon is the brightest object in the night sky, so you don't need a long exposure to capture it.
It is good to use a tripod, books or any object that may help you to keep your phone stabilized for a long exposure. I've used the roof of my house, sticks, even tree branches. The idea is to keep your phone as still as you can while pointing to the place you want.
It's nice to see you trying. As you said, it is a good start and I know you will get better and better. I'm looking forward to your next photos. Thank you so much for sharing.
Love you 🧡
@Kimmkimm
I seek new interests and hobbies, other than Marvel or Star Wars, it can be anything, maybe even something related to Marvel or Star Wars. I used to have a YouTube channel buy I deleted it. I also used to draw Marvel characters in the past, they weren't very good, but I was happy with my drawings because I drew them. Whenever I take on a hobby, or something creative, I do it for myself, because it's fun and makes me happy to see how interesting the stuff I made is. So I will find new hobbies. Today I wrote six pages about Darth Maul who is my favorite star wars character, I would probably make a video on it, because I don't know, when I made videos, it felt like I was talking to actual people, about what I felt about particular movies, comics or series. I wanna do that again, and I will. I can accomplish anything, because the force is with me, and I am one with the force.
school has been pretty messed up because exams are here,(my school loves exams) and tomorrow is english, but I've done nothing, so I need to deal with that. I hope ai can deal with both. This day might not have been great from an academic point of view, but it has been good for my health. I was doubting my emotions lately, if they were real, or all for attention. They were real, and I never did anything wrong for attention, I understand that crying about my ex boyfriend made no sense, but I had no way to deal with it, and it needed time. I've also discovered that my emotions, amd what I say can be mixed up with what others feel about me. I will train myself to be mindful of what I am feeling, and what others are feeling, so I do not mix them. Thanks for reading this
@CaptainRex
My dear Captain:
It is so nice to see you looking for new hobbies and interests. I'm proud to see how far you've come. I remember when I met you and you have changed a lot since that day, for good. It is understandable that some memories about your ex still linger in your mind, but you will feel better with time. I'm sure you can see that change too.
Drawing, writing and making videos about Star Wars sounds awesome. I don't know too much about it but I've seen a couple of films and I loved Rei and BB8. Rei is outstanding, she will never leave obstacles to stop her. She keeps fighting and walking, never going back. She is a warror and I'd like to be like her. BB8 is so cute. Even if it is a ball with no face, I find it so cute and I'd love to have my own BB8. I am sorry, I don't know who Dark Maul is (I hope I spelled it right). I looked a picture in google and he seems scary, with his fangs. He has like a double blade and he seems to be something serious. I bet he's a formidable warrior.
I wish you good luck with your school exams. School can be overwlehming. Please don't stop doing your best. I'll always be proud of you. 🧡🧡🧡
@Kimmkimm
Have you ever watched the old classic Star Wars? Luke Skywalker is such a strong character. His strength is why I love that character more than anyone else. I want to tell your about Luke, but I don't know if you have watched the Original Trilogy. People don't like the Sequels with Rey and BB8 because they disrespect the legacy.
@Kimmkimm
seen friend fire lately? i miss them a lot
@CaptainRex
They were on cups today. They're ok.
@Kimmkimm
yeah, i see them. i just didn't see them for a while, possibly because i am not very active on 7cups now, and they are not online when i am, because now i am online around 8am EDT. thanks for letting me know
(i don't believe this was thinking a lot right? i was just thinking about a good friend, and that's okay because it was not bothering me.)
@Kimmkimm
I've been meaning to ask you, I once studied in geography, that our planet is tilted at 23.5°. Due to this, the southern hemisphere has different climate than the northern hemisphere. [Location removed by @NoneTheWiser per original poster request] is in the southern hemisphere of our planet, so do you have summers right now? 🧐
@CaptainRex
I do, and I would appreciate not to make public my personal information as my country.
@Kimmkimm
i'm so sorry. i will contact mel to remove the precise location from the post. they are a forum moderator. they can do it.
The 21st day of the month is here. A day feared by me. And now that I think about it, it's stupid to live awaiting for one day every month and wishing that this day never comes. I pay so much attention to it, I live pending on it so much that it seems as if I worship that day. It's stupid.
And, maybe because of that, my subcoscious plays tricks on me. The closer the day, the more nightmares I have, the more I dissociate, the more I remember. And I'm tired of escaping from it.
Someone told me that I should accept my thoughts instead of trying to avoid them, and that's what I'll do now. But not without a trigger warning about violence, abuse and kidnapping.
Little things trigger me easily. Little things like the jingling of my keys sound like the chains of handcuffs for me. Little things like closing my room door accidentally make me feel like I'm locked in that room again. Little sounds like dropping a book make me feel like I'm being beaten again. But it all pales before the guilt. I should have said 'no'. I shouldn't have got in that car willingly. I would never forgive myself for what my body felt, because only a monster would enjoy a torture like that. And all these thoughts will just assault my mind when the 21st is coming. But now it's finally here and there is no place where I can hide.
Ugh, I don't know what I was going to say before dissociating or the purpose of it. I will just post what I wrote.
@Kimmkimm
Sister, I hope you don't mind me replying to this, or posting to this thread. If it is so, I will not post here, and will unsubscribe it. I promise. I am here for my perspective on your last forum post. If it is unwelcomed, I will ask a mod to remove it.
The post begins with you saying that it is as if you worship the day, and that it is stupid. I can only try to understand your emotions. I want to tell you that it is not you who pays attention to it, but the brain. I feel like the brain is more intelligent than we know. Those memories, the events which the brain has in those, were threatening the existence at the time. The brain does many things to protect a person. For example, it may develop DID to help deal with it, and certain alters in systems are so overprotective, that they don't let the body to go anywhere but stay at a safe place. So your brain wants you to exist, maybe that is why it is being overprotective and paying attention to the date.
A human brain is very evolved.
You are right about what you said about your subconscious. What we see when we sleep, the subconscious causes it. I see your mention of accepting your feelings. I have no say in this, you must choose it by yourself, but what we feel is real, and it is not like the feelings are fake, or exist for attention. Maybe they exist because we live in a society, because we are social beings.
That was all I had to say about it.
May the force be with you.
Rex (CT-7567)
@CaptainRex
Brother, thank you so much for everything you said. It makes sense somehow. Unfortunately I've been dissociating a lot today and I'm a little lost right now. I don't understand what I wrote and I don't want to read it because I may trigger myself.
I know the brain may be so powerful to protect ourselves. But sometimes it seems counterproductive, as it seems to lock itself in the past and relive one event again and again. I don't understand how that can be an attempt to protect ourselves. Maybe the brain is clueless.
I don't know what else to say. Please feel free to write everything tou want. I appreciate having you in here.
I love you 🧡
@Kimmkimm
Hugs ❤️
I search and search and find that I have no words of comfort to offer you. The pain is too overwhelming to name, so I hope you will forgive me for simply silently hugging you. ❤️
@Kimmkimm
Hiya this is a pawsome idea!!!
hang tough stay pawsome ur friend 🔥
@Kimmkimm
I would like to thank someone who's been incredibly supportive and holds a special place in my heart 💙
Kimmy is the kind of friend that everyone needs, and I'm so so lucky to have her in my life. She's one of the strongest people I know and holds so much understanding and love in her heart.
Kimmy, it means the world to have you think of me and check up on me regularly even if I don't say so. You're the sweetest and most beautiful person I've come across here, and your texts certainly make my day. You deserve the entire world 💙💙
Thankyou so much :)
@caringPomegranate1401
Aww, you did too much for me. You always appeared to comfort me when I was falling appart, you had patience with me, you listened to me, you supported me, you made me happy, and I'll never forget all of those things. I am the lucky one having you as a friend. I adore you. Thank you so much 💙💙💙
It would be impossible not to think about you.
Tired of everything. School is overwhelming. Nights are neverending and restless, dark and full of nightmares. Voices commanding me and humiliating me. Chains everywhere. Physical pain after flashbacks. I see gross things where there are only everyday objects. Triggers in the tiniest things. Bizarre things, perverted things in my head. I'm rotten to the core, corrupted and perverted. Am I losing the battle? I feel my sould giving up.
im not sure whats real but it must have been real im all filthy and so tired my hands feel so heavy my legs shake and im gruesome im sure it happened again but hes left now and i want to clean myself but i dont want to leave my bed im so dizzy i dont know whats going on im so tired ok im bask i dont know how much time has passed im a terrible mother my dogs are outside and they must be hungry and freezing im a monster they deserve a better mother im sorry my babies this will never stop i dont want to give up god please help me im crazy now
@Kimmkimm
Kimm, I am worried. If you think something has happened, I hope you can get some help, maybe call your mum or another adult who can help you. You don't have to do this alone, Kimm, there is help out there. I am here for you, just PM me if you want to talk ❤️
@Jnyx
Hey kimm! I’m here :)
Do you want to talk about anything? I’m here🥰(just trying to figure out how can I get this on my laptop lol
@Jnyx
It's ok. I'm so happy to see you again, especially after so much time. We have to catch up but I don't know how. I think we will figure it out.
And, about what you asked me in the chatroom, I think I'm in a pit and it's too hard to get out of here. I'm to tired to explain it but I made a couple of posts a few days ago here and here.
I'm too tired of everything and I want to go to sleep. I hope we can talk anytime soon.