Work Prompt #19: What is one question that might be bothering you?
Welcome back all, I hope you are all taking it easy on yourself at work this week.
A couple of weeks ago we discussed: What have been your 3 most fulfilling work experiences? Thank you to all who participated and shared their thoughts for discussion. I enjoyed them. I hope you all did too. If you didn't share yours, please share them here and I look forward to reading and discussing them with you.
This week's prompt: What is one question that might be bothering you?
Whether it is related to career, skills, growth, or workplace, we all might have a question that stresses us out and we hope that we might have an answer for that. So, this discussion is an opportunity for us to explore those questions and discuss to figure it out. Let's share to discuss
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@ASilentObserver well... if I had to ask... how would I know the answers to the questions I am seeking? Honestly just wishing everything would make sense some days. But oh well!
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Will my life ever be stable?...
Currently, dealing with medical issues/disabilities, so I haven't been able to work. I did all the steps of applying for cash assistance, disabilities, unemployment, even child support (abusive ex is out of the picture entirely) etc but it didn't work out. My doctor also kept missing the deadline to fill out the unemployment forms and I've had to go through MANY different doctors...
I'm tired of being in constant pain daily. My chest and ribs hurt, my heart palpitations hurt, I can't walk for more than 20 minutes without wanting to collapse. I hardly have an appetite...I'm tired.
I'm working towards a real estate license, already finished ALL my online classes, and finishing up a contractual writing class at this very moment -- so all I have to do is take both the school exam and state exam...However, my future feels grim despite this...
@ImpudentIncognito you are experiencing a lot right now with chronic pain and difficulties in getting the support you need, impudent. Feeling constantly in pain and unable to do things you enjoy is tough. What thoughts come up for you when you think about the uncertainty around your future?
@ASilentObserver
For the real estate license I have to take the school exam at the specific state -- and it will expire by the 1st of next month if I don't take the exam soon and I will have to spend over 915€+/1000$+ to redo my classes. My online classes (which I finished) are tied with the school exam. So they both expire at the same time...
So to give further context... I live in **Planaterra with my (toxic) mother, but need to fly to **Solterra, where I originally was. I'm currently broke -- and the apartment complex refuses to give me my security deposit...My family (mother and brother) said they would help me get a plane ticket (or extend the classes for 92€/100$ less than the plane ticket), but slowly backed out. Originally, my father, mother and brother were going to split 3-way to help me... and now they are saying "we'll see"....
Therefore, I talked to my estranged father on how my classes cost about 137€/150$ to extend (since it's cheaper than plane ticket)...So, he today, my father gave that amount to my BROTHER and said "Here, give it to your MOTHER first and see if she needs it, then you can get the leftovers". It felt rather odd and I felt slighted that he PURPOSELY gave the EXACT AMOUNT I needed, but to my mother.
Furthermore, my mother is known to sabotage my career plans and has done so in the past (ex. She promised to take me to job interviews, but then didn't). She has crazy mood swings and occasionally takes it out on me for no reason. She used to physically and verbally abuse me when I was younger (as well as SA me...). Now that I'm older, she has deferred to verbally abusing me instead. I'm her verbal punching bag. She has already threatened physical violence on me though -- but by saying she'll have my BROTHER come and hurt me.
So...Right now, I'm trying to figure out how to get my security deposit back and work ASAP so I can extend my classes and work (even though I'm physically disabled and have to call out whenever I am dealing with medical issues -- although I have no choice right now...).
I like the idea of working in real estate because the schedule is EXTREMELY flexible and the sales is all that matters(I used to be the top salesman at my old leasing agent job -- this is something I enjoy doing, I just can't move around as much anymore is the issue...). So I can go to doctor's appointments, work remotely, and have a life...but I don't know if I'll be able to extend classes in time...
My current plan is to work a part-time/temporary job, get the 92€/150$, extend the school exam expiration date by 3-months, study, and buy a car and get a place rented out in Solterra and (quietly) move over there one day when I am financially secure...Though, I don't plan on staying in Solterra for a long time, it is just something temporary. I want a COMPLETELY NEW life and start a new chapter away from places that have caused me trauma...
If worse comes to worse, I'll just re-enroll in classes and try again. At least I'll go through the material fast and know what I'm doing...
But yeah...that's where I am at with the uncertainty. Just tired of trying sometimes, things just don't seem to go my way and have to make many back-up plans. I feel like giving up sometimes, and having physical ailments bite...But I keep pushing because I want to be FREE from my former abusers and give my son a better life than I used to have...
**Pseudonyms
