Work Prompt #17: Do you struggle with self-doubt and negative self-talk?
Welcome back all, I hope you are all taking it easy on yourself at work this week.
Last week we discussed: What are your experiences with respect in the workplace? Thank you to all who participated and shared their thoughts for discussion. I enjoyed them. I hope you all did too. If you didn't share yours, please share them here and I look forward to reading and discussing them with you.
This week's prompt: Do you struggle with self-doubt and negative self-talk?
The battle with self-doubt and negative self-talk. How many times have you found yourself hesitating to take that leap of faith, pursue your dreams, or simply speak up because that little voice inside your head told you that you're not good enough? It's a struggle that many of us face, but it doesn't have to define us.
I am looking forward to discussing these issues and sharing experiences to support each other in this journey towards emotional well-being. Let's use this space to discuss and share our struggles and challenges to support each other better on this front.
@ASilentObserver
Yes but being in a work environment where it seems like nothing you do is right helps. Sometimes I get to where I'm treading water and not drowning at work and then I get an email from someone asking about something else or pointing out that I neglected to movs one folder to two different locations ( which I think is dumb & a waste of memory) or that I put an address wrong (blvd. instead of st. Lots of coworkers don't even bother with details like that but it gets pointed out to me).
Or I get emails asking me to change something only to find out that someone else has already changed it and I wasted time that could have been spentnt on another task.
Or like what happened yesterday. I asked for the link to the network drive because I needed reports faster than coworkers were putting them in the folders. They were onlu up until the 12th & I needed to be caught up to at leat the 17th in case one of my supervisors decided to randomly loik at my things and send an email about it.
But, the link wasn't working. I tried all I could think of (& was within my power. Don't have Administrator rights) but couldn't connect. Reluctantly, I went to a manager to see who I needed to contact in IT for access. Then he told me that I needed to be on the VPN & he said it like it was common knowledge & I was an idiot. No one told me that & there is only one other network that I have to be on the VPN to access so why would I even think of that? Especially on top of everything else I have to keep straight?
@Enthenia That sounds like you're feeling frustrated by the constant criticism at work, and it can bring up feelings of self-doubt. It feels difficult to feel like nothing you do is good enough. Would you like to share more about how these experiences have affected your self-perception?
@ASilentObserver It's hard to recall what things werd like before I got this job and at first I thought I had found a permanent place again after my position with another company got eliminated after the COVID apocalypse.
But, as things progressed and work dands became heavier, I realized that I couldn't do this for a long time. Then I almost got fired for doing jury duty because the manager who approved the time off request couldn't remember doing it & they called my family and worried them. This was also during the follow-up period of the write-up. I didn't take my mobile with me because I knew they weren't allowed in court so I had a bunch of messages to go through when I got home. And, during one of the meetings I had to do for the write-up, I was told of alternative ways to let management know if something like that happened again. I don8 think I got an apology or an admission of error.
This is one of the many examples where I take steps to prevent something from happening and it still haapens because of someone or something else and I get in trouble. Why would I feel like I'm competent after events like that? I mean, these are people in positions of power and I'm told to implicitly do whatever they say because they know more. Yet some of these people who know more can be in the break room for forty minutes to an hour chatting or chatting with people from other delartments and never get in trouble.
There are double standards everywhere.
Depends on the day. Work force could use a little more structure. Feels like catch up all the time. I doubted work for a while because I had to drop out of school from too many demands. Balancing 2 jobs didn’t help. Not enough of me to go around. Some projects get the short end of the stick. Go with what you think is right.
@MoonLightShadow423 Thank you for sharing, moon. You have high expectations for yourself. What would it mean to you if you were not as good at your job as you used to be?
I could see that. Told the my main job we need some extra help. Don’t think they can afford anymore people to pay.
Second job all over the place. There is no management. Do as you feel.
always come back to school another time. Until more help is available. Things will just have to be postponed.
@MoonLightShadow423 you are feeling frustrated by the limitations at your workplaces. The extra demands without enough support must be challenging. How are you managing with the stress?
I had to make sense of stuff. Before it would irritate me and the. I would be upset and complain. All that did was rattle people’s cages. I stopped and let things be. Get the work done when I need to.
@MoonLightShadow423 I am glad you have found that expressing yourself and finding ways to cope with stress has been helpful for you. What other ways do you find that you can manage stress?
carve out time for fun, call up family and friends. Have me time
@ASilentObserver
Do you struggle with self-doubt and negative self-talk?
Yeah, but not as much as I used to. It used to be really bad, now I just physically exert myself. Exercise helped me a lot more than I thought it would in this area. Working out is one thing I struggled with a lot. I've gotten a lot of comments by family and friends about my weight and the way I ate, so I was always self-conscious about how I looked. I would avoid mirrors and looking at myself as much as possible. Hated going to see my aunts and cousins because I knew they would mention it and then laugh like it was a joke but it hurt a lot. So, I never really got into working out because I never saw results then I'd get upset binge eat and feel worse and the cycle simply continued. I think it was like three months ago I wanted to be happy with myself. I started doing these little habits and eating less junk food and replacing it with healthier things little by little.
Then, I started getting into Calisthenics because I always thought it was so cool. In the beginning, I couldn't even do full 1 push-up and I was absolutely embarrassed by myself. I almost quit after that, but I said if I just keep going I'll get better. I stuck to my workouts, progressed little by little. Made sure my form was good, kept up with my good eating habits and I still have a long way to go but I can at least do 5 push-ups slow push-ups with good form and I am proud of that. It may seem small, but it's definitely helped my confidence and discipline. I have a lot of faith in myself and my abilities, a lot more than before and I hope it just continues to grow from here on out.
@JollyRacher It feels like you have made some great changes towards focusing on your health and fitness goals. How has your experience been with exercising and making healthier choices impacted your self-doubt and negative self-talk?
all the time especially at work lately, like I'm just bugging them if I try to talk to them or I'm annoying them or whatever, I know they like me, maybe cause they give me the extra food when shift I'd done and everyone else has gotten food they give me extra whether I eat it or not, I mean they would throw it out if they hated me right ? lol. or like if I wanna ask a question I hesitate amd feel like crying LOL.
@angelmommy15 It feels frustrating to feel uncertain about how your coworkers perceive you at work. Receiving extra food suggests they may hold you in high regard, but communication difficulties can still cause distress. What kinds of questions do you often hesitate to ask?
lots 😅
Used to all the time but now never. So proud of myself for overcoming that. YAY ME!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
@akunknown This is good. How did you overcome it?
@ASilentObserver
One time instead of negative self talk I did positive self talk and the results were better so I decided to stick with that and I’ve been doing that ever since. When I’m in a bad mood or bad situation, when I have bad thoughts or anything now I just tell myself things like “it’s ok you’ve been through this and have been through way worse many times and survived and are still thriving you’ll be fine and getting through this will only make you stronger” which is all true
@ASilentObserver Yep, my thoughts can get the best of me sometimes. But it's not as prevalent as it was before anymore now.
@Whelve1 I am glad to hear that your negative self-talk has reduced somewhat. What kinds of things trigger these negative thoughts?