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Anybody else having a rough time with being an "adult"?

User Profile: tobecontinued
tobecontinued August 15th, 2016

I just turned 20, and my world is spinning 😳

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User Profile: courageousNickel3304
courageousNickel3304 August 15th, 2016

I am 24 and am still struggling with this. I was recently talking to an older fiend of mine and she said she also has this dilemma. I guess it's something that doesn't really go away. But at least we all feel this way together. Hope this helps.

1 reply
User Profile: tobecontinued
tobecontinued OP August 16th, 2016

@courageousNickel3304 It does :) It feels better to know other people are also adjusting. Sometimes it looks like others are having an easy time, but it's only what I see on the surface.

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User Profile: courageousNatural63
courageousNatural63 August 15th, 2016

Happy belated birthday @tobecontinued! I understand completely what you mean. It is a HUGE change for anyone. The time you become an adult you are instantly thinking about the tons of responsibilities put on you that didn't exist before. You're definitely not alone in this feeling. The good news is it just takes adjusting to the change, learning how to juggle the new responsibilities, and not be too shy to ask questions (or ask for help). Do your best to relax and just take it step by step. The stage of feeling like it is too much will gradually get lighter day by day as you adjust.

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User Profile: tobecontinued
tobecontinued OP August 16th, 2016

@courageousNatural63 Aw. Thank you. Taking it in little steps is good advice... I'm also too proud to accept help sometimes - something I can work on!

1 reply
User Profile: courageousNatural63
courageousNatural63 August 16th, 2016

@tobecontinued yeah, asking for help isn't always an easy thing. I'm glad you found my response helpful.

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User Profile: derailments
derailments August 15th, 2016

Extremely rough time.

I don't want to think about any of my responsibilities. Thinking of the future has me ridden with anxiety.

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User Profile: courageousNatural63
courageousNatural63 August 15th, 2016

@derailments yeah I use to have the same fear. One day in lecture the professor said something so random but it helped me a lot. He said to not ever let fear stop you from doing anything. That everything looks hard until you actually do them.

That's with any fear or issue really. The first step is accepting it and facing them. All the fear and anxiety is in that first. After that you realize its not as bad. Then like anything the more you do it, the better you get.

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User Profile: Daydreamer47
Daydreamer47 August 15th, 2016

@tobecontinued lol yes!! adulting is hard lol

User Profile: ManandaPanda
ManandaPanda August 16th, 2016

I totally relate to this. Ever since I started living on my own I discovered how hard and stressful it was to adult all the time. But that doesn't mean you can't take the time to do some fun kid stuff when your stressed out. I like finger painting! Or watching Disney movies and eating ice cream is always nice too. :)

User Profile: InvaderStitch
InvaderStitch August 17th, 2016

I just turned 26 a few weeks ago and I still don't feel like an adult, but like someone said I know several other people who say the same thing.

"When I need an adult I look around for an adult then I realize I'm an adult and I look for an adultier adult"

i saw that on a meme one time (I'm on my phone or else I'd post the meme) but it describes my life so much!

Being an adult is hard and I'm sure you're doing a great job. :)

User Profile: Rhea
Rhea August 17th, 2016

@tobecontinued

Hi there! I hope you're holding up well now!

love to you! :)

User Profile: LaaLa
LaaLa August 19th, 2016

What does it even mean to be an adult? To have a bunch of bills you can't pay? To get a job that you hate, that beats you down every day? To leave home or even be kicked out by your parents?

Of course, I do not have the answers for any of these questions. These are just the things that people tell us we're "suposed to" do, because that's just what an adult is. The truth is that there is no real way to define an "adult". By society's standards, I should be an adult, but I don't feel like I am.

I'm not sure that I agree with the overall idea of an adult that most people have.

Please excuse the length of my post. Anyway, yes I have a terrible time being an adult. I don't know what to do or how to do anything.

1 reply
User Profile: tobecontinued
tobecontinued OP August 19th, 2016

@LaaLa I'm right there with ya... I guess I'm using the words "adult" and "responsibility" interchangably. But I do feel pressure to act differently, which is weird. Maybe I just need to be okay with whimsy, and my romantic view of life.

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User Profile: Belis
Belis August 19th, 2016

@Tobecontinued

Everyone matures at their own rate. I am an odd kind of person. On one hand I am a professional with a very responsible job involving literally making life and death decisions involving other people. That's OK.I can be an adult for that. I am considered by colleagues to be very mature and reliable.

On the other hand, in my personal life, I continue to behave child like and seek out opportunities to be dependent on others. I can't fully understand yet why that is but the pattern is clearly there.

What I find useful in trying to move on is a book called 7 Habits of Highly Effective people. It talks about making transitions to being more independent and relying on yourself and keeping relationships with others healthy and adult like.

User Profile: Cenozoic
Cenozoic August 21st, 2016

@tobecontinued

I'm 26 now, but I will never feel like an adult. My family has tried to push me to being one of those adults with the life sucked out of them, walking around like a zombie, repeating phrases like a robot. But only because they love me and want me to become responsible and independent. Sigh...

I have my own place, pay rent, buy food. You just need a cave with a fire and food and water, and you're set for life.

I think everyone gets nervous about whether or not they will survive once they fully emerged from the pupua as confused and dazed adults. Having the freedom of doing everything we want, yet doing nothing we really want to do, is the tricky part about life. The irony.

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User Profile: LeelaBug
LeelaBug September 15th, 2016

@Cenozoic

I feel you. Except I've booted my abusive parents out of my life and have no one to go to for guidance. I don't even know what I want to pursue in life, and I'm almost 30. I'm here if you ever wanna talk about it.

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