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Mental health/Education

PrettyPapillon4354 February 12th, 2020

Hello overyone.

I'm in somewhat of a dilemma right now.

Lemme start from the beginning.

At the end of 2015, i got depressed. I wasn't diagnosed but i know it was depression, as i would wait for literally the end of the world every single day, i would never go outside, and my brain was absolutely numb, it was like i was staring out of an empty shell.

Anyway, that happened. Anxiety came with it. In 2019, i got mostly better.

But in this time i didn't study at all, like absolutely nothing. And i was like 12- 15 over the course of those years. So i missed a crucial time of education.

And now i finally decided i'd do an english exam, but i have to wait till i'm 18 to prepare for it. And i feel so ashamed and pathetic. Not to anyone around me, as most might think, but to myself.

Has anyone else had a similar experience? Where their education was delayed because of mental illness? If so, please share your story here, it would make me feel so much better❤❤❤

6
DistortionHeart February 12th, 2020

I was being bullied at school then i started to fear the entire school building. I thought some classmates were spying on me and I was afraid of them breaking into my home. I stopped being able to concentrate on school work when I stopped doing it entirely I spent my entire days wandering outside hopelessly instead of going to school I was tormented by the fact i was being spied on and uncomfortable being watched I was miserable every day I stopped eating much and didn't do anything but walk outside hoping that everything would stop the torment was killing me inside and i felt like no one was safe because they manipulate my family and teachers and everyone behind my back to believe them that I am deserving of this. spreading all lies about me and they wanted to trick me because they were experimenting on my mind I missed the entire year I got kicked out because so many days I stopped and no one was able to make me come back so that is how I wasted all the years and never finished school

3 replies
PrettyPapillon4354 OP February 13th, 2020

@DistortionHeart

I'm so sorry that that happened, how are you coping now?

2 replies
DistortionHeart February 15th, 2020

@PrettyPapillon4354

I'm stuck in a depression that I haven't been able to do much my functioning is suffering still

1 reply
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Madaraismyspiritanimal February 12th, 2020

Almost 4 years ago now, I quit my education after disappointment with an internship location. I didn't inform anyone at my school or anything. Got really depressed, not leaving the house at all for almost 2 years, till a family member sought professional help for me.

While looking for the right treatment, I tried picking up the same education again. Most people I told about it were pretty understanding, but I just wasn't ready to continue like nothing was wrong yet. I tried studying, but every time an exam came up, I couldn't get myself to go, being scared to fail.

So, at the end of the school year, I paused it again. Now I'm getting full-time therapy ever since, doing a fair bit better. I'm not sure yet if I want or can finish the education I started or want to persue something else.

It's tough and scary having this dark cloud looming overhead, able to strike at any moment

1 reply
PrettyPapillon4354 OP February 13th, 2020

@Madaraismyspiritanimal

I understand how you feel, i'm so sorry, it is really hard. You're not alone and i believe in you that you can do it, you can finish your education! Stay strong, and don't forget you aren't alone❤

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