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Finding Patience

Lifer May 16th, 2019

.....SCREAM!!!!!! My mother is suffering from some form of dementia - I get that and I accept that. The part that is too hard to accept is her inability to reason. Please send me good thoughts so that I can find the patience within me that she deserves.

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mytwistedsoul May 16th, 2019

@Lifer Hey How are you?

Kind of a stupid question, I know.

My grandmother had alzheimer's. It's hard to deal with. Frustrating. Good thought's coming your way. I hope you find some patience for her and yourself.

Take a deep breath - count to 10 - good thoughts, yeah?

1 reply
Lifer OP May 16th, 2019

@mytwistedsoul. THANK YOU! heart

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Bonzo2006 May 17th, 2019

@Lifer

Man do I feel your pain. My late father was losing his mind towards the end and now my 88 year old mother is heading that way as well,

I can't give a ton of good advice because I get frustrated and short with my mom. When I'm not around her I feel guilty about the way I feel. It's not their fault.

Either the brain outlives the body or vice versa. Rarely do they run parallel.

Get as much support as you can. The caretaker is usually forgotten in the fray.

Good luck

Butterflee June 3rd, 2019

@Lifer we are with you @Lifer🤗🤗🤗🤗. Nothing is easy in this life and good people like us are always struck by life unfairly...we all have to bear our so called "crosses"...she is your mother, she is not herself anymore, now you have to take care of her and have patience like she had with you as a little girl...she gave you the gift of life...think and remember the good times that you had together not the turmoil that you have to go through at present...you have my total sincere compassion and sympathy and I really wish I could bring you real consolation in some way...I like seeing you in the games forum and in discussions. Stay with us andwe shall feel for you🤗🤗🤗 you are not alone...

1 reply
Lifer OP June 5th, 2019

@Butterflee Thank you! My mom's back in her own home and I think that helps our relationship tremendously! She's much happier at home- more lonely but happier. Unfortunately she lives 1000 miles away from me, so that's difficult..mentally and emotionally draining. We're looking into weekly support so maybe that will help too.

I love games as well! I enjoy your company and admire your ability to "see" the answer so quickly and clearly! :)

1 reply
Butterflee June 5th, 2019

@Lifer thank you🤗. I sincerely wish you find a good solution for your mother and I wish you well🤗🤗🤗

Zengrl June 11th, 2019

@Lifer Having visiting nurses at her own home sounds really good and will help you a lot. Im on my second parent now going through this. Luckily my brother and I were able to transition her to an unassisted living home and then to a home specific to dementia. My brother is moving and so now Im going to move her to a home that is even closer to me and has better services. If you ever decide that your mother needs a dementia home, definitely reply to me because I can tell you what to look for. Its a very challenging process, but it sounds like you are making good decisions. Sending big hugs to you. 🥰

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ruffneckred June 5th, 2019

Sending you good thoughts, my estranged mother has started whoing signs of dementia. hope your situation improves.

amethya June 9th, 2019

Alzheimers, and Dementia is a tough disease. Learn as much as you can sbout it. When you are with her, enjoy as much as you can. Look for support groups. My heart goes out for you, I have been there.

NadhyanaLuna June 24th, 2019

@Lifer

Sounds tough :( Feel better soon :)

lazyKatz June 24th, 2019

I'm having problems with ill relatives one is blind and has Alzheimer he doesn't know where he is most of the time....he is always becoming violent. His wife is bed bound and her organs are slowly shutting down. Watching this happen is heart breaking, they have no quality of life. I try to be a positive person most of the time and laugh at lifes problems...a bit of a Monty Python outlook "Always look on the bright side of life" .....I do try to make light of the situation but its not easy.

3 replies
Zengrl June 24th, 2019

@lazyKatz It is bery hard having two relatives with serious issues at once. It sounds like you have a great attitude. I still love Monty Python as well

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lazyKatz June 24th, 2019

@Zengrl

We can only do our best, and as you say its only a flesh wound....They heal but regets for not doing everything needed of us don't

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Zengrl June 24th, 2019

@lazyKatz I hope you recognized the flesh wound line from Monty Python. I understand the regret too. Its important to be there and make decisions you can libe with. 💖

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Lifer OP June 24th, 2019

@lazyKatz You're in my thoughts Katz. I think I'll change my ringtone to MP's "Always look on the bright side of life". So when she calls it'll put a smile in my face and put me in a positive mood. ❤ Thanks!!

2 replies
lazyKatz June 24th, 2019

@Lifer

Hope it works.

1 reply
Lifer OP June 24th, 2019

@lazyKatz It has already. Just setting it up has brought a smile to my face. I love her so much but she drains me so the humor will help. THANKS!!!😊

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lazyKatz June 24th, 2019

Thank you for you kind words....... It may sound wrong but over the years I've learnt to laugh at inappropriate times, its a kind of coping mechanism.. I used to be a nurse.

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Zengrl June 24th, 2019

@lazyKatz I have a lot of respect for nurses. I

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lazyKatz June 24th, 2019

@Zengrl

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