I can’t keep up as a working mom
I feel like I’m failing at everything as a working mom. There isn’t enough time or energy to keep up with everything. I feel like I’m a let down to myself, my kids, my friends, my colleagues, my family, even my dog. I can’t be the person I want to be to anyone because I have so much on my plate.
@lovingVillage6519
i think you can only do the best you can .....
some people have hacks and tricks and realistic ideas of how much can be done in a day
my daughter is doing more then i was able to do ..... but things still fall thru.
do you have help and support ? my spouse was little or no help but my son in law is great with helping daughter
Thank you. I think some of the stress is just what our society has created as normal for moms. It’s just made me dislike life so i wish there was some solution to make it easier.
My husband transports the kids to some activities and does most of the laundry but all of the rest of the responsibility for the family is on me.
@lovingVillage6519
Thanks for being brave and self-aware enough to come here to look for support and community.
I'm not a parent, but I have family members, friends, and colleagues who are working parents and, I can tell you that you aren't alone. The moms in particular struggle with balancing everything and the pressures that society puts on them to do it all.
It's good to see that your husband supports with caregiving and chores around the house. Do you have any other forms of support? Can the kids or other extended family members help out with chores?
Best of luck to you and hope the new year brings positive changes.
I have some mom friends that are wonderful and very helpful with trading off kids. I also had great babysitters at our old house but they are not conveniently located at our new house.
@lovingVillage6519
No one is keeping score .... and there is no norms ... part of the many people feeling anxious and stressed is believing they must go down some checklist often made by someone trying to sell a service or a items.....
Have you spoken to your spouse on a re- division of household things or is it you feel you must do because you do not think he will do it the way you would?
perhaps re- evaluate your expectations and share items even if old enough including children in helping out
My husband and I have spoken many times about division of responsibilities. He acknowledges that I do almost everything for the family and sometimes agrees to pick up more responsibilities but he never actually follows through and does them. It actually makes life harder for me to count on him since the majority of the time he does not do what he says.
@lovingVillage6519
You are not alone. Being a mom is exhausting. You're doing everything. You're the person everyone comes to for the good and the bad and the questions and the answers. And you're so busy doing everything for everyone else that you've forgotten to take care of yourself.
my mom is in the same spot as you, she lost her high school sweet heart to cancer 5 years ago. i was 8. Shes been on and off antidepressants. I have hope for you. Stay strong, nice lady. We all feel like we fail the people we love. I hope the very best for you, just a reminder at the end of the day no matter what you do your still cared for and loved by people.
@darlala I’m so sorry. Watching a parent go through depression is so hard. I’m glad to see you have the courage to be open about the situation and it sounds like you are a huge support to your mom.
This experience is harder than anything someone your age should have to go through and it sounds like it has forced you to master some life lessons much earlier than most. I commend you for your strength, your empathy for your mom, and your respect for mental health and self care.
Best wishes to you and your mom. She is so lucky to have you.
You sure are going through a rough patch but don’t you worry you must be rocking that MOM status because you actually cares for your kids and others ! We are here with you 😊 Here is a rainbow for you dear mom 🌈 Spread love 💕 You will always rock no matter what specially for your kids !
Thank you all for the kindness and encouragement.
@lovingVillage6519 Hi there! I read the title of your post and my heart skipped a beat, I feel that the mere fact you are reaching out and posting like this and getting so much support from the replies of all ages, not just 35 & over is amazing. I think we all feel a little like this sometimes and I do hope that things improve for you too. I found that just having a short tie to myself, even 5 or ten minutes made things so much better, puts me back in control, I also realised that sleep is such a massive healing tool, Going to bed as soon as I could so I could snatch a few more minutes in the morning helped me and maybe might help you too?
Do try and pop into the 35+ group support room too. It is open all day Weds and you may find it good to chat in real time too but sometimes forums are all we can afford time for. Take care and I will send you good wishes for 2023.
Listening - One Step At A Time!
@lovingVillage6519
sending you so much love ❤️
I feel your pain! I am a single mother of an autistic child. No help from the father. No family around to help. Just by ourselves and me trying to keep up with everything while suffering from anxiety and depression. All we can do is keep trying to do our best. We don't have to be perfect.