suffer from Anxiety after viewing and reporting some harmful content on internet
hello guys,
i want to tell and share a litttle story about me, because it is really making me a lot of pressure.
Im a man over 30, lived in aisa, I always see me as a kind and a man with responsibility.
But like some other men, I do sometimes watch porn, but only ordinary ones. Im straight, without bad hobbies.
Three month ago, when I was usually do some searching on google, I got a link to a porn website, which at first I thought it was a normal one. But after a few click, I noticed it is not. It was a website contains a lot of harmful content, like violent, terrible scene. Some of them I did even doubt whether it is legal( not child pornography, but ***, self harm or even sex abuse).
I was so scared so I left it. But as I mentioned, some feeling like justice told me that I should do something. So I went back to that website, with fear, find the two which makes me uncomfortable, and then reported it to the website.
After two days, I got a reply that the two which I reported was deleted, but things doesnt goes to end—- a feeling or a thought constantly attack me that “if these two videos are involve real crime, then I just helped the website removed two evidence”
I dont know why I thought it like this, but I do worried now, in the past two months, I felt scary and a lot of pressure.
By the way, the two videos which I reported were uploaded more than years before. And because it is horrible, I dont want to remind it again.
And now, because this website is in the US, Im living in asia, I dont know whom to talk to, and I cant tell my family, because it is about porn, feel shamed to say this.
I also tried to contact the US police on tips.fbi.gov and IC3 , for online crime report. But got no reply in the past weeks.
Im worried and dont know what to do, actually I did nothing wrong, but a feeling like “this ruined my life “ stressed me.
I dont know what to do.