Are you where you thought you'd be by this age?

haha i'm a boy now, that's kinda funny. no girlin' for me anymore :)

@LonleyCheese Wow that's an interesting one! When did you make that decision?

@victoriousblue17 around age 12 or thirteen is when I realized, woulda been cool if i'd realized before i started ahem growing up a bit more if you know what I mean though

Actually, no. Life went entirely different. I’m trying to make up for lost time, but much of it is in the books. With what I have left to accomplish I wish things would come together easier, however I know all of it takes a lot to accomplish. I want to feel well inside my own skin and to be this way with others.

No I am not. I became disabled early in life. I have macular degeneration, thyroid disease, diabetes, and a host of other problems. I am severely bipolar, to the point I am no longer able to work. I am surviving off the system and savings and praying my disability case gets approved. I am living in the housing projects, off benefits like foodstamps, and a life insurance policy i cashed out early. All I have left to comfort myself is my art, something I always took for granted but has become my identity and my way of achieving "flow". I still have hope, that my art could someday give me a way out of my poverty.

@victoriousblue17 such a good question to reflect upon!

am i where my younger self wanted me to be?

sort of! but yes, my younger self would be amazed and happy with the way my life is presently. they will also be proud of me for all the growth and progress.

I am by no means where I thought I'd be at this age. My dreams never came true. My twin brother committed suicide, and I lost my sister to cancer. Then I got cancer. I survived it, but sometimes I wish I hadn't. I have nothing to look forward to but old age and poverty. My life has been one long stretch of emotional pain and loss. I hate my life. I can't believe I ended up like this.

@goodSpruce3041 I'm really sorry that happened to you. I resonate with your statements, especially about not wanting to be here. What is motivating you right now?

The fact that I really actually earned money to be able to support myself will have definitely surprised my younger self.

Hello I am Melissa 39 single mom never married. Engaged 3 times long story with each of those. I am not where I thought I would be at this age. My younger self was selfish I thought I knew everything & all I wanted to do was drink & party. So I guess all my life choices has me where I'm at today.

I can relate so much, all them long stories and all them useless desires, all the choices i dont really regret but logic says they have lead things to be the way they are now, like the years have slipped through my fingers ( as they say ). I just want to thank you for sharing,i find your reply so inspiring. And i really dont know why do we always feel better knowing there are others with stories similar to ours ? I wish you all the best in life and may all your hopes come to life. Im Turning 40 next summer and i was never married.

@Melissa3483 This feels familiar. I thought I'd be married by now and part of an awesome family. I thought I was great and others would see it. Now, I think so lowly of myself. It's like this isn't even my own life

@victoriousblue17 No, I'm not where I had thought I'd be. I'm much more conventional, and didn't make much from what I was given. My younger self would probably be surprised about the amount of self-knowledge that I've gathered, and about the complete lack of purpose.

honestly i would probably be really surprised i’m alive right now :’) but go me we are still a round 😎😎😎

Wooh!

@victoriousblue17

I have never had any expectations or hopes for what the future would bring.

No. My life turned into a different direction than what I had hoped… In my younger years, I thought I could find the right person to marry, have kids with, and a career I love and feel passionate about. I had none of those things happened for me now. Instead I lost my dad to lung cancer, I quit college because I was unhappy. My then partner of 10 years cheated on me and left me for a better life. I am now stuck in a job I really hate, but have to work to make ends meet. I started school recently, to change my career and it has been very tough. I’m emotionally and mentally drained from life and seeing that all my friends and classmates have a better life than me with great careers and happy families, marriages just makes me feel even more depressed…

I didn't think I'd do such a god awful job of choosing my mates. Just one disaster after another.

The rest of my life, I can't complain. Educated, high tech career, well received by my peers, healthy, climbed out of childhood poverty. Just wish all that success wasn't getting flushed down the toilet by lawyer fees and child support and all the associated stressors

@victoriousblue17

My life has not turned out at all how I imagined or hoped.

@victoriousblue17 mostly. I had a very expensive first marriage. I wish there was more in the retirement account. Other than that, I feel like I'm doing pretty well.

Heck, no. I did not think both of my parents would be dead by the time I was 40. I did not think I'd be in a dead-end career where I wouldn't make enough money to buy a house. I thought I'd be in a relationship (I am not). I was still naive enough to think that the world could/would become a better place.

I didn't think my mental health would take such a turn for the worse.

I didn't think there would be no hope for the future.

@hematite43 I feel you. I didn't expect to have a TBI from my ex-stepfather, didn't expect to be homeless, or to have my mother drinking herself to oblivion, leaving me to raise my siblings. I am sorry about your parents.

@victoriousblue17 I am nowhere near where I thought I would be. I thought I would have friends, a partner, and a degree. So far I have no friends or social life, never been on a date (got ghosted the day before my first date ever), and am a semester behind on my education.

Im not sure how to answer this question , but i enjoyed thinking about it, i believe i am where i should be, and i havent imagined what today would be like.

As strange as it sounds Im not sure if i would ever phathom the impact of the choices made today on the future, or how the choices we made 20 years ago have to do with how things are today, or if they are even connected.

Thank you so much for sharing such an inspiring thought.

No… I can’t remember what I expected of myself at this age but it’s most likely around working myself to death. Whereas in the reality of things, I couldn’t have imagined that I would be getting myself into therapy (best investment/decision I’ve ever made for myself). Then finding out that if I remove everything and everyone around me, at the heart of the core, I don’t really know who I am and starting from there… to build myself and my life the way I want it to be and not confined to others (families, friends, society) expectation of me. It’s a long road ahead of me but I rather be here than the other, more destructive, path.

@victoriousblue17 I didn't think my child would be so mean. I love her but I'm surprised daily by how hateful and disrespectful she is. I always imagined me and my child would be best friends.