Bio
I do not handle dating or relationship breakup issues.
I can help with self-esteem, depression, anxiety, PTSD, family communication skills, and personal growth.
Send me a message if I'm not online and we can set up a time to chat.
Click here for Bible-related articles about emotional health
Contact me if you have questions on the above articles.
Recommended exercises:
Expressive Writing - Every day take a piece of paper and for 15 minutes write all the feelings, words, thoughts you hear inside your head. After you are done, you can throw it away if you want, because the good comes from letting your mind sort out all the confusing things going on. A lot of people who do this see a gradual clearing after a a few months.
https://positivepsychology.com/benefits-of-journaling/
Radical Acceptance of Feelings - We waste a lot of energy struggling and fighting with our feelings. "I feel so sad... why am I feeling so sad, snap out of it. Am I some kind of loser? blah blah blah"
Instead we can accept our feelings as reality, even if we don't agree with them. The "whole you", the bigger "you" can be with that part of you that has that overwhelming feeling. You can say to yourself "You are feeling so sad, so alone, so isolated from everyone. It's ok. You can be the way you are for as long as you need to be." Then take a deep breath and let that thought sink in for a minute.
You are showing compassion for the feeling, letting it be, giving it space and that allows it to gradually change. You then have more energy to move on.
(This is from DBT, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, and the work of Ann Weiser Cornell.)
Clearing a Space - Imagine you walk into a basement or garage and it's a total mess, junk all over the place. Where to begin? So you start by just taking one thing at a time and putting it in a box, and when it's full set the box aside and start with a new empty box. You don't have to sort the stuff, you just put it all in boxes and stack the boxes against the wall. When you're done you have a nice clear space in the middle and you feel better.
Our minds are like that. Inside there's all this stuff, so we feel distracted and anxious. So take the first thing you find inside, look at it, and set it aside. Like maybe it's that remark your partner made yesterday that really hurt your feelings - what should you do with it? For now just set it aside. Then go to the next one, look at it, set it aside. Keep going until there's nothing left. You have a nice clear space inside your mind. Sure, all the stuff is still there, but it's there on the sides. So now at least for a few minutes you can take a deep breath and enjoy the peace.
(From the work of Gene Gendlin, Focusing)
Self-Compassion Exercises
https://self-compassion.org/category/exercises
Resources for Survivors of Childhood Abuse
Self-help books
isurvive.org/helpful-resources/books-you-may-find-helpful/
Anonymous text chat support
online.rainn.org
International directory
https://nomoredirectory.org/
International Crisis Support
https://www.befrienders.org/
International Directory of Hotline Support
https://findahelpline.com/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines
