When I'm angry, why do I always feel the need to hurt myself?
316 Answers
Last Updated: 03/20/2022 at 8:30pm
★ This question about Self-Harm was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Top Rated Answers
You feel like it calms you down, that it takes away the anger, but its just hiding from me, making it numb.
Everyone has their own way of coping with their emotions. It sounds like found one way that works for you. You're doing the best you can to survive.
Anonymous
August 7th, 2015 5:16pm
Your body becomes dependent on the quick release feel good chemicals from your brain. You develop an addiction just like cigarettes.
When you are angry you must be angry at yourself so you feel the need to give yourself pain. What have you done that is making you angry think about it?
Anger always needs a let out....if one is angry with someone, that person is shouted at. If you don't have an outlet to express your anger, it leads to self harm.
Anonymous
August 8th, 2015 9:17pm
When you're angry, hurting yourself or someone else is a common urge to get. You just have to refrain from doing it to yourself or others and try to calm down or take it out on an inanimate object.
Anonymous
August 9th, 2015 2:17pm
Because it may feel like an easier way to understand pain as opposed to mental anguish. self harm is a means of converting my emotional pain into something i can quite literally put a band-aid on and it heals. though it's only a temporary fix to somewhat more permanent situations
Sometimes people have issues dealing with strong emotions, and they search for a sort of release to stop having the feelings they're having. Self harm can sometimes act as a sort of release or distraction. It can also be due to feeling self-loathing, maybe caused by feeling a lot of shame growing up.
It's a coping method. By inflicting more pain on you, it distracts you or helps you deal with the emotional pain or struggle.
Anonymous
August 12th, 2015 5:28am
(et)_(ah) close them | (Lo)^(Ve) open them
kaw kaw
Its all shit
this lla sti
this LL A Sty
This l.l A sty
This (.) A sty
This ( . ) A Star
This (( . )) You see ass now
This (( | )) too late
This (( _ )) or (( ^ ))
(( Lo ^ Ve )) 8 (( ET _ AH ))
| (Lo)^(Ve) open them | (et)_(ah) close them |
Sometimes it seems like you have no one else to take the anger out on, so you tend to take it out on yourself.
Anonymous
August 13th, 2015 4:29am
Sometimes it can be hard to process emotions in a healthy way. Anger can often lead to a tendency to destroy things, which is why sometime people hit pillows when angry. If the anger you're feeling is toward yourself, you could be looking to take it out on yourself.
Anonymous
August 13th, 2015 11:59am
When angry..people often tend to (try) hurt themselves..they become narrow minded and are unable to think,act and behave properly..so things so wrong :P
Anonymous
August 13th, 2015 5:28pm
I think that it is one of that ways how you try to calm the inner ache, so you hurt yourself to make yourself feel easier
When we feel angry and with no one to blame, it's easiest for us to blame ourselves, however wrong that blame may be placed, we blame ourselves because we judge ourselves far more harshly than we judge anyone else and when we feel like we are found wanting, we feel the need to punish ourselves.
Because you want to cover up that pain with another pain, so when you hurt your self you feel numb. I know this, because I used to self harm and it made me feel better, I used to do it when I was angry, sad and feeling useless. I get that you might think it helps but it really doesn't. You get addicted to it and it will just get worse and worse. Please try talking to a family member because they will get you the professional help you need and when you get angry you need to feel the need to hurt your self again :)
Anonymous
August 14th, 2015 9:41pm
I think when you're angry, you lose the thing in the back of your mind that helps make rational choices. So by being angry, you don't think that what you're doing is wrong, and you may have built up frustration and don't know how to express it in a safe way.
Anonymous
August 15th, 2015 6:07pm
I know that it's pretty natural to want to lash out when angry often brought about by great frustration or deep hurt. And often we've been taught not to lash out at other people. So instead we use self-harm to lash out at ourselves, to punish ourselves instead. It's a learned pattern that can be unlearned with time and help.
Because you don't love yourself either due to bullies or something that happened with you in the past.
you might feel as though you 'deserve' punishment for something that has made you angry - please note however, that you, under no circumstance deserve punishment.
Anonymous
December 11th, 2015 1:06pm
its a common way for people to take out their anger or sadness, to take it out on themselves, its quite dangerous to do
Most often than not the easiest way to get rid of frustration is to either cry or to take it out on self... i'm not saying its right but we do it because subconsciously we think the root cause of our anger is nobody but our own actions... its an instant release of emotions and also a form of sympathy. So we know what has triggered the emotion... how do we control it??? Very simple... Every time you are angry convert the destructive energy into constructive energy... get on the treadmill or jog for 30 mins or pull out a canvas and splash it with colors. This not only calms you but heals you too... worked for me , hope it works for u :)
Anonymous
December 12th, 2015 11:37pm
Perhaps because the anger you feel gets a bit lost in transit (if you follow) and ends up without a direction or outlet of any kind. Anger that isn't expressed in a way that deals with it positively - like through creativity, exercise or even by finding a secluded place and screaming about it - can build up to the point where it doesn't matter what caused it, it's there and needs an escape. Unfortunately some people find the easiest or most effective escape to be through some kind of pain. That's one theory I suppose.
Because you have so much anger inside that you body feels the need to let it out in a unhealthy matter
If you're suffering mental health issues, one of the major issues is loss of control. Self-harming when you're mentally unwell/angry, etc, is a form of control. You can't control what's happening around you, but your subconscious believes that YOU'RE in control by harming yourself. So, if you can't control the outside world, you'll turn it inward.
I don't want to hurt others and the anger I feel sometimes is directed at myself and I feel the need to hurt myself because it feels like I deserve it
Because it feel like it is the last resort and it is the only way to escape. Try not to cut and go and chat how you feel and this may stop you from cutting.
You may feel the need to hurt yourself because of the sudden relief of anger when you hurt yourself the pain you feel over rides the anger making you feel better
Anonymous
December 17th, 2015 7:32am
Sometimes, one can get mad at themselves & hurt themselves in an attempt to punish themselves. When one is angry at a loved one, sometimes we hurt ourselves to show a sort of punishment for getting angry at a loved one.
Anonymous
December 17th, 2015 7:15pm
you have to learn one thing: hurting yourself is not good. i also cutted my wrists and i also thought i was helpful. but it isnt. when you're angry, you want to hurt someone and this "someone" is usually you.
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