Moderated by
Tracy-Kate Teleke, PsyD, M.A., LMFT
Marriage & Family Therapist
I assist adults and couples in CA experiencing relationship challenges and interpersonal struggles including anxiety, depression, and a myriad of other life challenges.
Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
June 28th, 2018 11:21am
Think about the after life. Research on how to manipulate life. Research on how to resurrect. Has anybody got the book of death and teach me a few spells?
When you find you have a preoccupation with death, ask yourself what it is in your life that is going on that you can control or change, if what makes you obsess over death is something related to your life, try removing the person or issue that is causing you to feel life isn't worth living.
By thinking about life, and it's worth. If you have nothing in result, then think about what you -could- have, and think about how to earn that. Setting up plans, and slowly executing them, will not let you have time thinking about death.
Anonymous
July 18th, 2018 12:27pm
Well, what helped me was to start thinking of the complete opposite, life. What I like about life, what I hate about it, what I live for and how I want to live.
Anonymous
August 2nd, 2018 11:48am
by holding onto the one good thing you have. By holding on and thinking about that one good thing that makes you happy. Then those 100 reasons will look very small to end your beautiful life.
You can stop thinking about death by thinking about the happiness and success you have gained in this life with the help of your friends and loved ones. Once you leave this world you do not get an option to return. And this is your life. You should not be thinking to give up on this life because of some issues which will be solved sooner or later. These issues are not so worthy that one may start thinking about death in order to get rid of these issues. You are precious and worthy and you can not that to yourself
Anonymous
November 11th, 2018 4:23am
Take time to focus on the big picture. Do relaxing exercises, and put time and energy into something beneficial. For example, you could take up sewing, exercising, or baking if you really wanted to. Just try and take the focus away from something negative. It also might help to talk to a therapist or close family member or friend. just talking about it might help. If none of these work you could seek advice from a psychiatrist or physician who might be able to provide medications that can make the thoughts more manageable. The journey itself might be hard but you have to remember to keep your head up! c:
Best way to escape thought's of death is to help others. Keeping ourselves busy with something worth, something we love doing will help us celebrate life. That is my take on life. people will die everyday and fear death because ultimately they feel they havn't done much in their life. Once gets the sense of incomplete, something lacking in real life. If we can find purpose of our life and have the sense of completion then death is never a terror. It would be work well done. So keep celebrating every precious second of our life with purpose and gratitude.
Anonymous
January 3rd, 2019 11:07pm
Sometimes I read about other people's experiences of suicidal thoughts or issues. Sometimes I listen to music or talk to my loved ones, specifically the one I am with. It is really hard not to think about at times but it's a lot of self-will and strength that brings me back to reality to fight. I think we all have in us but some have to dig deeper than others to find themselves and pull themselves out of that misery ocean they almost drown in. Believe in yourself even though it's hard. Others have been down your road but everyone has gone a different path. Find your own path and help yourself. That is why there are several aids out there for you too.
Death is inevitable. You can't escape it and sometimes you may want to run to it. So it is a topic most at some points in their life think about. But the thing is, you were put on this earth for a reason. You are hear because there is something inside you. Once you realize that you can stop thinking about death because you know you have a purpose and know that you need to be alive and that life is a great thing. Try and limit the amount of "death talk" you do. It will help get your mind off of it because you won't be having a conversation about it. Also try something new, like a hobby or new sport and you will be focused on that and focused on trying to do good at that that you will forget for the moment about it and soon once you get your mind off of it like that you won't think about it so much.
Death is a vast, mysterious presence in all of our lives and it more than likely touches us many times before we meet it ourselves. We see death in the news every day, we hear about it in our communities and often we think about the death of loved ones for years and years. Sometimes we think about the death of ourselves, too. This is natural and thinking about death occassionally can add meaning and be a useful tool to focus our lives.
At the same time, thinking about death too much can be troublesome. We begin to think life is hopeless and without newness, as all we are thinking about is its end.
Life is equally as vast and mysterious as death - but sometimes we can get sidetracked by its negative aspects and events, and we can forget the simple gifts that life offers, such as this present moment. For one minute, try focusing on your breathing. You could also focus on really studying a flower, or talking to a friend, and really listening to them. The trick is to be in the moment, and focus all your attention on whatever it is you're doing. If you keep doing that, one day you might discover something precious - and you might not want to stop thinking about THAT. Can you imagine what it would be like - not being able to stop thinking about... life?
... but that's another problem altogether! :~) Good luck to you.
Anonymous
April 13th, 2019 11:04am
Try keeping yourself distracted from the negative thoughts. Maybe teach yourself to think more positively, do anything you like, such as a hobby or something you enjoy, it'll help you control any negative thoughts or feelings or you can try finding out what's causing you to have theses thoughts or talk to someone about what's causing them if you already know since it'll help maybe stop them or control them a little more, try talking to someone you feel you can trust, find a comfortable way to talk yo them, or a counsellor or therapist could help help cuz you don't know them so it'll supposedly easier to talk to them but it don't work for everyone. Try doing someone you think might stop them whenever it's something already mentioned or something you want to try but not involving any self injury etc so your safe.
By convincing yourself that death is not something abnormal, and it happens to meet all living beings alike.
Further, as the saying goes, "one day we'll die, but every other day we'll live". So which one do you think deserves more reflection or attention?
When we avoid attributing more significance to death than it really deserves, it becomes easier for us to stay in the present. This automatically gets reflected in our mindset, attitude and behavior.
One thing more: never over think about finding a way to stop yourself from thinking about death. Paying too much attention to anything magnifies it.
I hope this helps.
Take care.
Anonymous
April 25th, 2019 11:31pm
Death is part of life, good and bad, black and white, the cycle, the antagony, we generally start thinking about death when we gain consciousness in early childhood. You suffer for your own death and you suffer for the death of others. We can put it away with distractions, work, socialising, living in general, shutting it out. But we cannot stop thinking about it, being for us or our loved ones. It's a fact. Be active, seek people, work or have an activity and it will keep your mind off of it. I was suicidal myself, but i was lucky with a pharmaceutical nurse who identified my anguish on my face and gave me fake calming pills and she saved my life with her professionalism. When you think about death try to conect with someone or reach for help or do it yourself by waiting it out or thinking of good thoughts. For me it worked, i go on even though i have the troubles that i have myself.
It is the most empowering thing there is. Think about it. Let’s imagine life as a project and death as a deadline. How many times have you found yourself procrastinating, essentially wasting time, when a project doesn’t have a deadline or it is very very far? I know I have! This is why people tend to divide big projects into smaller bits and set their own deadlines.
What does this mean? Well, do you know when you will die? Do you know how you will die? Unless you’re clairvoyant, the answer is NO. Therefore, you shouldn’t be afraid of dying, and treat each day like your last. Make the most of it. Which brings us to the real question:
What do you want from life?
Your survival instinct tells you to live forever. I tell you it’s possible. You can live forever in what you leave the world and humanity. Think of Aristotle, Archimedes, Edison, or Martin Luther King Jr. These are just big names, but every community has its “heroes†and every field has its heroes.
You can’t physically live forever and you should embrace it. Make it your motivation to do the most of your time. Why not use your thoughts to find to immortality? Bio-mechanics, anyone? Whatever it is, do it here, do it now.
People die in the most absurd ways. You can die in a car crash, you can die crossing the road, you can be electrocuted at home, your wardrobe can crush you, or you might have a heart-attack. You can’t know when or how. So, stop worrying about it or try avoiding the unavoidable.
To conclude, don’t think you are alone, weird, or different. Everyone thinks of death. Death is the same for everyone, what changes is their life. So, what is the meaning of life? Life is but an empty book, and you are the writer.
Now, GO! Go write the most amazing story mankind has ever read.
The best thing you can do is you don't fight the moments when you start thinking about death. The more you try to conceal the thoughts, the more they will come back even stronger. Death is undeniably a difficult obstacle to cope with, and an important part of the coping is learning acceptance. And you can work your way to accepting death by avoiding to try and hide the thought. In other words, observe it without any judgement, and it will eventually weaken itself. And when the thoughts do weaken, you will be ready to finally face death and accept it.
Anonymous
January 30th, 2020 8:45am
It’s not about stopping the thoughts or changing them as this is passing judgement and since thoughts and feelings have no substance it’s about self forgiveness and compassion. Can do this by allowing thoughts and feelings to be there and simply acknowledging them. Denying emotions can bring on thoughts of death and self harm for some people. So identifying feelings and thoughts positive or negative is great because it allows us to let go and not hold on and move towards a path of peace and safety and self care. We can do this by practicing meditations for self compassion
Anonymous
February 1st, 2020 1:56am
it depends on your own situation and why you are thinking about death to begin with of course. are you thinking of death as the people who are already dead? then you have to question why that is, state what you feel towards someone or write it down, see what you wrote and say, is this ok to think about? should i seek help? if you are questioning and thinking about death regarding hurting yourself or killing yourself, then that is something you need to talk to someone professionally about. dont bottle in those emotions, dont tackle this all on your own. ive learned that when i used to think about death as in suicide, i was alone. i had no one to talk to or confide in or even ask for help when i could have but didnt. i regretted not reaching out, i regret not getting the help i needed. if want to not die or not think of dead people, its something to confide in someone who you can trust first or someone you know who can get you help and listen to your thoughts and feelings. if there is no one out there for you, there are hotlines for suicidal thoughts. speak to someone.
Listen to empowering music, list out reasons why death can never be the best thing to do. Think good about yourself, always. you go this! however, if you can't stop thinking about death and then you further your thoughts to ways you can die, talk to someone who listens, talk to people who make you feel good about yourself. it's all in you, you don't have to blame yourself or anyone anytime you face a major or minor setback. also, list out things you love/like doing, find a purpose that becomes the reason you don't think about death anymore. find things that you love about yourself. keep trying:)
I think if we’re being honest with yourself everybody thinks about death. It’s something that most people on whether religious or not fear. Death seems so final so dark so cold but then again it seems easier because it’s just giving up instead of fighting the problems that life throws at you. I think that when we face the reality that we’re just trying to run away from my problems that will realize that death isn’t the answer. Once you realize that death will be worse Then just fighting through and making do with what life has given us we will stop wanting to kill ourselves or in their life or even others. Whenever I start thinking about darker thoughts that I really don’t want to be thinking about but I can’t help, I think about all the things that make me happy in life whether it’s a bag of colorful skittles a pretty flower that I found a pretty day a smile from a friend I just think of all the bright beautiful things in the world even though there is so much dark I CHOOSE to see the good in everything and not the bad. That is how we can stop thinking about death.
Anonymous
March 8th, 2020 7:26pm
When I found myself in a similar position, I heard some very inspiring and healing words from my therapist. I would like to share those words with you today and I hope they help you too.
Can you think of a way for you to integrate your focus on death in order to truely allow you to live? Living with death as a constant point of reference, as if it were sat on your shoulder, allows us to hold onto the significance of impermanence. Our lives, even each moment, is finite, how can you feel most alive in it...? Your thoughts on death and destruction don't have go be merely constricted into an escape hatch but potentially a fuel to engage with the brightness within you.
If you are struggling with suicide ideation, please reach out to a therapist. There are a few on this website that list suicide ideation as they area of exepertise. And if your suicidal thoughts increase and you are not safe any longer, please connect to suicide.org, call a crisis line or go to the nearest ER.
Look at how far you have come through. I am sure you feel like it is very hard. But you got this! Think about all the things you could do with your life. And how many people care about you. And how your death could affect them. Try to focus on the positives of your life and make the most out of it. Focus on what makes you happy and I am sure you can do it, you got this! If one of your friends was going through the same situation and asked for your advice, what would you say to them?
By focusing on gratitude and writing down all of the things that I am thankful for, I can redirect my worries about dying or other people dying. This helps direct my attention to the people and things in my life that bring me joy and make life affirming. Also, it helps me to call or visit family and friends because spending time with them helps me feel connect and lively. Sometimes when I have dark thoughts, I realize I'm tired and feeling down. By just knowing that simply being tired makes my mind wander towards thinking of death, helps me realize that its just my brain doing that. Many times a good night's rest and if needed a mental health day can reset my energy, leaving me to think more positive and lighter thoughts.
The question as I see it is:
"How do I stop thinking about death?"
The short answer would be "You don't" and here is why:
Death is a part of life, it always has been. The question is actually about living. Carving Your own paths, incrementally, while being considerate towards others on this path.
Life is hard. It comes with its own set of complications for EVERYONE and they are all unique as we all are unique.
Every singel one of us has the capacity to make some small difference. We dont know what kind of a place our (grand)children and relatives will live in 100years from now, but looking back we can see the progress that has been made so far. Just supporting and being there can make a huge difference for those close to us and that could enable them to make a difference in our future. And along this path we may find other meaningful goals and relationships that will help us grow or when we could help others to grow. You have to think about death as well - in the sense that our time here is limited and we are obligated to do the best we can so that there will be progress and someone from the future can look back and say - I want to be like that - I want to be a giant that the future generation could stand on!
Death is the only certainty in life. To let the fear of the end of the road take over your life, is to let life pass you by. Let go and live, there's so much to gain, even if it's only temporary. To be aware of the fleetingness of life can be a source of fuel to live to the fullest, it's all about perspective. Worrying is always a misuse of your imagination, instead, you can even use the overwhelmingly negative emotions as inspiration to turn it into something beautiful, be it life experiences or a way of self expression through art. We're all in the same boat.
Death can be a scary subject for a lot of people to come to terms with but just know that their are a lot of people who are going through what you are going through, and who have similar fears, feelings, and thoughts. You can not force yourself to not think about death, you can only come and accept it and not let the fear of death effect how you choose to live and enjoy your life. Do not live in fear just because you are scared. It is understandable to be scared of death, we all are. Just know that we are all here with you, and we understand.
Accepting that death is a naturally occurring event that will happen to every being who steps foot on this earth. Death is absolutely certain. Release the grasp it has on you and accept this fact. You can then find peace in enjoying each moment you have here on earth like it is your last. Think about the ones you love and accept that they one day will also die. Think about your pets, they too will some day die. I dont believe that there is a way to "stop" thinking about death. But i do believe we can reframe how we think about it.
Why not try embracing death as a natural part of life? Ask yourself what exactly it is you fear about death? Many times, we fear not having lived our lives according to our truths. As soon as you pay attention to death, it loses its hold over you. It isn't so much thinking about death that is the problem, but HOW we think about death. Try asking a question instead, like "If I died tomorrow, what would I most regret?" That way, you can use death as a tool to help you live a more authentic life. When death stops being a thought that you need to avoid, you might find that it stops controlling your thoughts so much anyway, because you have made peace with it.
I know hard this must be to deal with as death is something inevitable that none of us will be able to avoid. A few years ago when my grandma passed away, death weighed heavily on my mind despite the fact that I was barely even a teenager. It's scary knowing how easily someone can be taken away from you, or how easily you can be taken away from the world, but acknowledgement/acceptance of death without letting it hinder you from living your life to the fullest is extremely crucial. Life is so short, and it's hard to not be afraid of it ending, but living life in constant fear won't allow you to experience things and to feel inexplicable joy that you will always cherish. Romanticize your life and be constantly present in the moment; this eliminates regrets.
Anonymous
July 12th, 2020 7:10am
listen to music or talk to someone that makes you happy and not think about death or be around people that make you forget everything and feel like yourself and feel happy or just do anything that makes you not think about death it could really help to just draw out how you feel or just be around others that give you a good vibe a happy vibe and i really don’t know what else to say but just do what you think is best for you and what could help you and take of yourself is the main
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