Why doesn't taking care of myself come naturally to me?

Taking care of yourself is essential for your emotional, mental, and physical well-being. Although there are times where self-care may not seem to feel as natural as we may think. Identifying unique needs and them meeting them with nurture can be quite the feat, especially if you are not used to doing it, have suffered childhood neglect, or have an illness such as depression. Start small. Make very small, gentle, and attainable goals, these will lead to bigger ones.

Mental health affects a lot of people and taking care of yourself is one thing that it may decrease your interest in. A lot of people struggle with taking care of themselves mentally and physically and talking to a therapist about it or downloading an app (ie. Pacifica) may help you to track your habits and allow you to work on improving them.

because we feel guilty if we put ourselves first. just do a few small things a day which will have a big effect, walking, exercise and mindfulness help me alot

I believe that for many of us, we are wired to care for others and we are also culturally taught, whether consciously or unconsciously, that putting our own needs before those of others is greedy and self-centred. Overcoming natural wiring and a lifetime of cultural conditioning is a challenge, but not impossible.

This might be happening for many reasons, but it is normal. Unfortunately, in today's society, it is normal to not like ourselves, to be extremely judgmental, etc. Learning how to love yourself might be a long process, but it is completely worth the work. Start with small things and work your way up. In my opinion, it is all about "fake it until you make it".

Because sometimes we are taught that we have to put others before ourselves but taking care of ourselves is equally, if not, more important.

Well, Unfortunately some people just don't have what it takes to be able to take care of themselves. I personally will go a week or more not showering simply because i cant find motivation to do so

First off, it is great that you are asking yourself this question! You have recognized a pattern and identified a problem that needs solving. Many people have trouble with this, and i want to remind you that you are not alone. As for why this is a pattern for you as an individual, there could be a variety of answers, but broadly speaking, it might have something to do with an experience or set of experiences that you have had. I would recommend working on this with a therapist, someone who can have this conversation with you in confidence and who has a lot of educational background that would help you move forward in your own life.

It doesn't come naturally to anyone. I don't believe many people have woken up one day and decided to take their vitamins every day, go to the gym 4 times a week and decide to have the friend circle they want. Taking care of yourself is NOT easy. Now what you might ask is what can I do to actually take care of myself and it's something that you have to start slowly and believe that the process will work. A good first step would be to start something or remove something that is hurting you(things you can manage to do) and then you will really learn how to take care of yourself. Just do the first step and it will come to you.

Many times we get wrapped up in our emotions and forget to do the most basic of things. When we do basic things, it makes everything much easier.

It's a learning process. The good thing is you can start at any time. Start with simple things such as taking care of your skin and then go onto bigger things. Also, give yourself time to adjust and no need to tackle everything at once. Take care of yourself because you love yourself and see the world around you improve.

Being a caregiver by nature, it is hard to take care of myself when I'm used to taking care of others more.

Since you have knowledge about both of the positive and negatives of yourself. This affects how you see yourself. Knowing your negatives blinds you from seeing your positives. Thus, you might be pushing yourself from believing in yourself. This stops you from encouraging yourself.

Its different for everyone. For a lot of people its not a top priority and honestly thats okay! It truly depends on you :)

I understand how it can feel difficult. There may be many thoughts, such as "I don't deserve it" "I don't have the time or resources", but you should move on from these thoughts, because you DO deserve self-care. Self care can come in many ways, but again, I could understand how frustrating and nearly impossible it might be to come up with something you are grateful for, or what you feel you have achieved, or aspects of yourself you like, because I've been there, and I've had difficulty looking past my flaws. But once you really dig in, see yourself for who you are, know that you do have control over some aspects of your life, and make a good change. You just have to accept that everyone deserves some love, and the greatest love comes from you, to you.

It seems like my self-care isn't as important as doing other tasks when things get really stressful. I have to remind myself that people need refueling, too. I cannot fill from an empty cup, so I've got to make sure that I am well before I try to help others. This isn't always easy because life seems to get in the way at times -- but it's actually remember that the little things are what help me do the big things that makes the biggest difference. If I model good self-care, then it's likely that I'll also be able to help others much more easily.

Not being able to take care of yourself can be a sign of a mental issue; however, for me, I am always worried about helping others as much as possible while ignoring myself. When I feel like time for caring for myself is not happening, I try to remember that I can not help others unless I take care myself. I have struggled with depression for years, and sometimes it is very hard to get up and do anything, let alone take care of myself. If you feel like this as well, I would suggest seeking help or talking to somebody about how you are feeling.

I think that sometimes we tend to care more about others and what they think of us then putting ourselves first. It’s hard to do that at first but when you learn that you are loved then it will come to you. I understand what your saying but it’s important that we take care of our needs first so that we are able to be there for others. You are so loved and everyone that loves you wants you to be safe and take care of yourself. I love you and I would never want you to feel like your not worth it

Sometimes it's hard to take care of ourselves, because it's like our role is to take care of others. If you find that people around you expect you to help them before taking care of yourself, it can lead to low self-esteem and self-compassion. It's very important to remember that taking care of yourself is the very first step to caring for others, and that before being a friend/lover/family member/caregiver, you are, first and foremost, a human being with your very own needs. If you find that this is your situation, try and take a moment every day where you set aside the "caregiver" role that you've been given (sometimes that you've given yourself!) and see yourself as the recipient of care.

Well maybe you never learnt as a child how to do that. Your parents most likely did everything for you and it made you really dependent on them. I think that isn't a healthy thing though. Maybe speak to a trusted person about this, that could be very useful to you Well maybe you never learnt as a child how to do that. Your parents most likely did everything for you and it made you really dependent on them. I think that isn't a healthy thing though. Maybe speak to a trusted person about this, that could be very useful to you

Taking care of myself never use to come naturally to me because when I was younger no one her taught me how to take care of myself. I grew up in a very rough environment, with a lot of unfriendly faces very far from my family, around a lot of people who hurt me a lot. They didn’t care much about my well being so I was never shown how to take care of myself. I was shown how to do chores and I was shown a lot of cruelty. As I got older I learned what cleanliness was and I learned how to take care of myself and I still am. I’m still learning to get sleep and to feed myself the way I should and I’m still learning to recognize when someone is mistreating me, but the reason taking care of myself wasn’t something I just did, was because no one around me took care of me, or themselves either.

It's because I stay busy in my works and can't find enough time to provide proper amount of care to myself. Although I make plans but due to being in a tough schedule most of the time those plans don't get a happy execution. I feel that if I maintain a good habit formation strategy and pick up good habits also make it a regular practice then I can be able to take care of myself as well as help others with a clear sense of understanding and not making unproductive assumptions while trying to help people. It'll also be a good thing to develop a peaceful mind as well.

I hear you asking why taking care of yourself doesn’t feel natural to you. What things have you tried to practice good self care? I can definitely understand this dilemma as I have often felt the same way. It is difficult to me also. If you’ve had any type of trauma in your life, It can definitely be more difficult to identify your feelings and needs. In what way are you doing a good job of taking care of yourself? In what areas could you grow in? Do you feel you are worthy just as much as others in your life are worthy of taking care of themselves? What is one thing you could do this week to nurture yourself?

I think this question really make me re-evaluate how I take care of myself. I tend to put the needs of others first before mine. I am a kind hearted person therefore it comes with the territory. I feel like when I take care of others, it just makes it more rewarding for me. To be able to see that others are cared for first is like caring for myself also. I also know that you know when you need to listen to your body and care for yourself so that you can continue reaching out to others to care for them.

Sometimes it depends on the situation; if you haven't had the encouragement and support from family and friends, from a partner or potential partner. Sometimes you need to find the thing that motivates you to take care of yourself. Self love is always a factor in these things. It can be hard without the support but if you can seek such support from family, friends or a partner (if you have one) can help, depending on your circumstances. Patience is required when trying to find yourself. If you're not sure of whom you are or meant to be, it can be a contributing factor. I hope this helps.

It most likely has to do with self esteem. If you feel like you are worth nothing and you do not deserve anything good in life you will put others first and not yourself. It is difficult to see and realize your own worth but it is essential in order to have a healthy life, healthy relationships and a healthy mind. Furthermore, how other people have treated you in your life can be a factor as well. When all you know is being treated like you are not worthy of good things someday you will believe it. But you deserve to be happy.

Maybe it's because all your life you put others in front of you, you worry about others health then maybe later that when you think about yours, sometimes it doesn't come naturally because you never took the time out to see if you need anything, or maybe you grow up taking care of a family member so much that no its time to take care of your self you find it really weird to do, sometimes you find it easy to take care of others ininstead of taking care of your self.....like you feel selfish if you took just a min to take care of your self

Taking care of yourself often doesn't come naturally, especially if you're a selfless person who tends to put others' needs before their own. It can be hard to put yourself first when people around you have their own issues, however, self-care is super important. Remember that in order to be there for others, you have to be there for yourself first! Personally, I try to plan self-care days monthly so I can take some time to reflect on how I'm doing and think about my mental health. Prioritizing yourself, even occasionally, is a step in the right direction. I hope this helped!

Well, it really depends on how you perceive the idea of “I take care of myself”. Some people think that “take of myself” means being beautiful, sexy by buying new clothes and makeup, other people think that by ignoring other peoples’ needs and satisfy their own, they are taking good care of themselves. For other people this “task” or “behavior” or “habit” of taking care of themselves means: «do things that make me smile», «surround myself with sane and caring people», «decide for myself and don’t allow others to decide for me» and many more. Of course taking care of yourself includes behaviors that are both physical and mental. Maybe taking care of yourself doesn’t come naturally to you because you focus on things you don’t really need such as makeup or vice versa. Try to figure out what YOU want for YOU. The answer is within you! Good luck :)

Maybe it's because we don't love ourselves in the first place. We keep looking on others' wellbeing and trying to control our futures instead. We never learned how to take care of ourselves. We somehow never learned that we have to take care of ourselves too in order to pour others. Somehow we never knew that we matter. But whoever is struggling thinking if they matter, I want to let them know that you matter. You must be a soul who tries the best for others, who is contantly looking for a more comfortable future. Remember you can't pour from an empty cup. It would be great if you could take step for taking care of yourself. Wish your all the best.