I hate my husband or wife. Why?

A lot of times we marry someone who has a lot of charaqcteristics of one of our parents. We are replicating a relationship we are used to and in somer way also trying to heal ourselves by creating again the situations that wounded us and hoping we can overcome it. Just as our parents push our buttonns and made us feel strong emotions and even hate so too our spouses arouse ths same emotions in us and a times we hate them

It might not be hate your feeling. Sometimes when people are together for a long time in a living situation or just a relationship, they grow to resent them and pick out all their flaws because they know them too well and have been around them for too long. You should sift through this and find out if it really is hate or just a mess of emotions you've never really confronted.

Workaholic, disrespects woman/man, rude, miser/greedy, dowry, false allegations, playboy, unfaithful, cheater, selfish

you may not be in love with her or him anymore, you may have stopped having sexual attractions to him or her?

Is it because they are abusive towards you? Or something in particular they did that made you upset?

Talk to them about it, it may actually help you. Because they might never know and then you divorce them and they be like: Whaaa?

Usually it's because of something you have done and feel guilty about and are projecting it onto them, or they have done something that has hurt you and you feel you can't forgive them for it, or you just no longer love them but don't want to leave them so hate them because of the situation you are in. Usually it's emotional or situational between the two of you. Communication often helps or if you feel it's right, leaving can help.

Only you can really answer that question. Would you say you resent them for something they have done in the past? Or perhaps a bad habit they have? Ask yourself those questions and maybe you'll find the answer.

You might hate them because they might have mistreated you or they are too busy and not paying enough attention to you. Try to get them to be more active or talk to them.

Listen, lack of communication may be why you Two are "disconnected" try speaking to eachother, respect eachother opinions and emotions and try to come up with a compromise.

I have felt this way about someone before but its may not be hate but a feeling that we consider hate. Sometimes we misunderstand our feelings and go with them when they may not be correct.

It could be due to some issues you could be having, which you could talk to them about and try to identify the problem or it could be due to loss of attraction

I'm not in your shoes, so I don't know why, but you should try to figure out the reason why you feel that way. Did they abuse you? Did something which upset you? How long have you felt this way? Did you tell them?

I hated my husband during a very dark time in my life. When I look back, I realize that I actually hated myself.

Only you can answer this. I can assume you are harboring resentment towards them, but the question for you is why? What did they do to make you stop loving them?

There could be lots of reasons. You could have expected them o be different, and when they aren't what you want that will definitely change how you feel. A lot of marriages fall because of finances, too. If you can't agree what to spend money on then that will change everything, most likely.

This is a very common adults face in their marriage. Often, people will date and have a happy relationship but once they get married and their lives become intertwined, they sometimes find out that their relationship isn't the same anymore. The reasons for this are complex and vary from couple to couple, but it's often the lack of compatible traits between each other that leads to an unhappy marriage. It takes a lot of continuous work and commitment for a marriage to function. For some people, this comes naturally and they enjoy being around their partner. For others, it's not so easy. Often, it's one individual who works harder in the relationship. This leads to resentment and if not addressed properly, will lead to the couple hating each other.

Most of the time, when you feel like you hate your spouse, you may actually be feeling something else (hurt, disappointment, or rejection, for example) but aren’t identifying it correctly. Once you realize the root of the emotion, it's easier to fix. So, let's say you're thinking: “I hate you! You’re such a slob!” What you may actually be feeling is disappointment that he isn't pulling his weight with the chores. To fix it, try saying: “I would love for all the dirty clothes to be in the laundry basket.” (See how we avoided any negativity?) Then, let him know why you’d like that change. For example, “I would feel a lot less resentful and would be less cranky if you’d help remove that obstacle from my day." Insight into where the root of the hate comes from will help you make changes for a more fulfilling relationship.

Hate is a strong feeling but it may well be how you feel. If you had to choose another word, which will it be? Once you can identify your feeling further, can you think when it started? When was the last time you didn’t feel that way? Has this feeling become worse overtime? I am asking those questions because only you know the answer. As you try to answer those questions you will slowly identify the reason for your feeling. To feel that way about a person could be because of what has person said or done , but sometimes it is because of our own issues that we direct to another to protect ourself. So I cannot tell you why you hate your spouse, the answer is in you. In my case it was the feeling of being dependent on my spouse financially. The fact you are asking the question shows me you have made a the first step of identifying a feeling that you do not want. It shows me you will find your answer. However If you do feel unsafe with your spouse i urge you to reach for help. I hope you will find your answer and will take the steps to stop that feeling . It is an emotionally draining situation to hate the person we live with. So ne kind to yourself and use any help you can get and any relaxing time you can afford. I wish you to feel better soon.

Sometimes love fades. Remember, marriage was invented when the average life length was like 40 years. People didn't stay with the same person for longer than 30 years. So it's not unusual for you to stop loving someone you spend every day of your life with. Many people also start hating their husband/wife... It is not unusual. How many times haven't you heard a reference to hating your ex in a movie? When the love it gone and you are still "forced" to spend every second of your free time in the same house, obviously you would get irritated. But you also might not hate them. It could simply be a reaction to not loving them anymore.

Your marriage isn't a fairy-tail, because life isn't one either. Your marriage is a blessing, not a curse. Don't be afraid to fall back in love. You'll never know what you've got until it's gone. If you've been hurt though, understand that there are people that are better than them. You deserve to be happy. If you're married, I'll tell you one thing: my wife is a blessing. But I wouldn't expect her to stay with me if I was abusive. I love her, you can find that too. There's a wonderful world out there. Please don't give up girls. God loves all, but I think he loves cowgirls more than any.

just because they are your husband or wife does not mean they are the one for you, people change after years and years, it’s okay to want a change yourself

Is it really hate or is it dislike? Make sure to know which one. It could be that things have changed in the marriage. You may be unhappy. Talk to your spouse. It will only get worse if you bottle any issues up and if you can try counseling as a couple and individually if needed. Nothing will change if you don’t try to change them. If at some point nothing works, at least you both tried.

"Hate" is quite a strong word to say. You might want to de-intensify that a bit. Ask yourself this: how would you feel if they get hit by a bus tomorrow? Annoyance, dislike and anger can soon turn to hate. Maybe their persistent and they annoy you. Maybe they have pet peeves. Maybe their temper bothers you. Maybe they keep doing what you tell them not to do. But it's important to go down to the nitty gritty and remind yourselves why you fell in love in the first place!

Sometimes the people we fall for aren't meant to be in our lives and you might have realized this after a while. It's completely normal to develop "negative" feelings towards loved ones and usually they'll pass by their own or by talking about the situation with the other person.

A lot of times we marry someone who has a lot of charaqcteristics of one of our parents. We are replicating a relationship we are used to and in somer way also trying to heal ourselves by creating again the situations that wounded us and hoping we can overcome it. Just as our parents push our buttonns and made us feel strong emotions and even hate so too our spouses arouse ths same emotions in us and a times we hate them

Do you think he/ she does not reflect your own goals in life? Maybe he/ she might not give you the attention or respect you desire. Or maybe they did something you can't forgive them for, but in their eyes it was an innocent mistake?

Hate is a very strong emotion. Why did you chose to use the word hate, rather than dislike? Please tell me more.

Sometimes in life we find that we have lost a passion that we once had. In this case, it's the love for a spouse. Life can be strenuous on a marriage. The routine and the repetition takes away the spontaneity. Bills and money can make like seem less grand, and you experience all of this with your spouse. You see their good, their bad, and their ugly, and they see yours. Life isn't as good as the movies, sadly. In this case, try to remember what you fell in love with in the first place. Remember that we are all less glamorous that we would like to be, and try to find that intimacy again. Make time for sex, romance, and conversation in every week. You will find that love comes more easy when you become friends again.

We don't start out hating each other, but behavioral patterns tend to gain momentum, when an individual's needs go unmet. Even with skill in reflection present in both partners, triggering can cause aggression. Partners should work through a third party to vent frustration, and insulate hostile communications temporarily, until things cool off!