How can I tell my mother in law to back off?

love this question. I have had to do this a few times lol. try being nice at first. I know its hard. but sit down and talk with her about how shes around to much. and that you would like space for you and your partner to grow. relationships are 2 people not 3. if that doesn't work you might have to be more blunt. this may upset her but over time she will get over it and realize you were right and that everyone needs there own space. mothers in law can really be a pain lol.

I understand that family members, especially step or in law family members can be frustrating to communicate and live with at times. I reccommend reaching out a 7 cups listener to chat and work through these feelings, and then if you are ready, try to identify what your mother in law does to upset you and work through it further. I cannot offer advice, but understanding and identifying what causes these unhappy emotions may be helpful in overcoming them! There are also great resources on 7 cups to help with various issues, such as anxiety and relationships. Speaking with a 7 cups listener and discussing these strategies would be a great first step!

Mother in laws are really sometimes the causes of the problem of a couple. There are many ways to tell them to back off but make sure that you can make them understand that things change and you and your partner are married already and she can do nothing about it, all she has to do is accept it. Tell her and make her understand acceptance. Whatever her reasons are, make her understand that she needs to accept the situation -- everything. You don't have to go bitchy or an ass on her. Just make her understand because maybe that's what she's lacking.

Tell your mother in law in a respectful manner that you dictate you own life, and it becomes difficult when she constantly tries to medel. Give her specific examples in which the outcome was negative due to her inserting herself into your life too much. Or instead, give her examples of times you succeded without anybody's input. It is important here to be respectful at the beginning as she is your mother in law, but if she continues to negatively impact you or simply put more stress into your life it is okay to be honest and tell her you got this!

it would be in your best interest to maybe calmly speak to her and explain to her that you are feeling a bit over welmed with everything that she is doing and that you would like it if she could give you a little more space so you can deal with some matter on your own and not have to worry about her always being there and then after that explain to her that you do not mind her being around but at times she can be a bit to much and you would just like to have a bit of your own personal space

Boundaries are important! I'm sure there are some things your mother in law wouldn't like. Consider sharing those boundaries with her. It's important to address these early on with people you come in contact with. It serves purpose for when someone is crossing over the line, that's a way you can give yourself respect. If you already told them your boundaries and they choose to ignore it, then consider distancing yourself a bit so you can show how important it is for you. It isn't helpful if you keep that within you because they may not know and if they do then the best thing they could do is stop.

Politely ask her to back off a couple of times. If that does not work, sit down with her and talk it out. Figure out why she is so involved and try to dissuade her from being in your business. Ask if there is a reason she is acting the way she is, it could be an external or internal factor in why she acts the way she does. Sit her down, and try to come up with a compromise. I believe compromise is always the answer. We should avoid arguing if it is possible. Arguing is not a nice way to figure something out.

It can be tricky to navigate familial relationships, especially within the family your partner comes from. However, all relationships can benefit from healthy boundary setting, and the mother-in-law with daughter-in-law relationship is no exception. How do we know when we need better boundaries? A lot of times needing boundaries feels frustrating, even infuriating, and like nothing is working for you. Putting in extra effort, constantly "letting it go", taking responsibility for the other person, being saccharine-sweet to avoid conflict--none of that is working. If you feel like that's what going on, boundary setting might be for you. Boundaries help avoid ambiguity because they help you see clearly what you are responsible for versus what the other person is responsible for. A good place to start would be to identify the problem area in your relationship with your mother-in-law. What is the specific conflict, and what is the driving factor behind that conflict? There is usually an underlying motivator that causes one or the other of you to act or speak in a way you normally wouldn't. Is there a deep-seated need that is causing you to act or respond to her in a strained way? Find support within yourself and develop a support structure of others to meet that need, if possible, so you do not give her control of you via that need. Then, practice saying "no" to her, simply and gently, but firmly. This is to demonstrate that you are willing to, and will be enforcing, your boundaries. If she tries to start in with you, respond to her without "reacting". A reaction is based on what the other person has said or done, but a response comes from you and what you are willing to express. A response puts you in power, whereas a reaction puts her in power. Then, learn to forgive and love her, while maintaining those boundaries you've established.

Start by thanking mom for her concern. ... Let her know you've got this situation covered. ... Keep the focus on yourself and use “I" statements. ... Stick to the issue at hand. Don't get sucked in. First and foremost, don't get sucked into her world! ... Work on your confidence. ... Stop trying to please her. ... Learn her methods. ... Learn to be a rock. ... Forgive and forget. ... Set boundaries. ... Find your joy. Set boundaries. Figure out the boundaries that you'd like to set with your in-laws, Hansen said. For instance, if your mother-in-law takes over your kitchen every time she visits, talk about it with your spouse. “Then have a respectful, but clear conversation with her about the issue.”

Sometimes the best way to get an intrusive family member to back off is to gain the support of your spouse. It's likely that they will feel the same way that you do about the situation and that when it comes time to confront the family member, they will be there to support you in your shared decision. That way there is no blame placed only on you for needing to confront your mother in law. The best way to tell her to back off is the be straightforward, beating around the bush and sugar coating the situation will only prolong the incident and often make matters worse.

You need to let her know how you feel. You can't just go up to her and tell her to leave you alone, you need to be polite and respectful of it. When you talk to her, I would suggest that you set a time to talk with her very calmly. Make sure that none of you are distracted whatsoever and politely tell her that you don't want her to always be there. That you need to live your own life. Be who you are. I do want to say however that how you say it will affect things.

I would say that depends on what type of person she is. Some people appreciate straightforward and answers. Some people will be very hurt by straightforward answers. You can guess what type of person she is by gaging how she talks to you. If she is very direct and honest, you should be the same way back to her. If she sugarcoats things, you should find a very nice way to hint that you don't want her around all the time. It's important to make decisions rationally, which can be hard when you are in an emotional state of mind.

I think rather than just saying back off in a general sense ( which might be seen as being aggressive) trying setting specific guidelines. Im not sure what the exact issue is but try to make it as specfifc as possible and make it sound more like a person reason why she should do it instead of putting the blame on her (it's not me, its you). That way she will have a harder time playing the victim or talking behind your back. If all else fails ask your partner to speak to their mother directly because they are more likely to go easy on them.

With your mother in law, like any other person in your life-- it's important to set boundaries. If she disrespects those boundaries, a chat of "Hey we're all adults here we need to respect one another" is important. My own late mother in law was a bit intense for my liking...But there were times she was too up in my business and I had to be firm but polite about hey, I can handle this I'm an adult. I think that if she's generally a respectful person toward you, and vice versa, she will listen to what you have to say. Sometimes it's hard but it's entirely possible if both parties are able to communicate.

Gently let her know that whatever the situation at hand you're dealing with is between you and your wife/child/parent/friend/whomever, and that you'd appreciate it if she'd let you take care of it on your own. Just let her know that if you do in any case need her advice - you'd ask for it! Its always good if you can talk to your spouse about the situation first and make sure that your spouse understands how it makes you feel. If possible bring your spouse along when you are going to talk bout it with you mother in law and make sure your spouse understands how important this is to you.

Having an overly expressive mother in law is very common in today's world. Should there not be clear boundaries set at the beginning of your relationship it can be difficult to establish new ones as different behaviours arise. It is important to remember that relationships should be equal and if one side is being particularly negative or not agreeing with your behaviour then there is a "right" way and a "wrong" way to communicate this. Setting clear boundaries is very important about what is and is not acceptable to you. There is nothing wrong with communicating how you feel if you are experiencing negative feelings. In fact, it should be encouraged to communicate effectively and in a timely way with your mother in law when issues may arise. Setting boundaries at the onset of the relationship should be encouraged, however, if this has not been done, it is never too late to establish them so the relationship remains healthy, open and sustainable.

That is a tricky one! Mothers in law can be tricky - they want the best for their child, but they can be overbearing at times for their child's partner. I have an overbearing family myself, and from my own personal experience, being open with them about how their actions have effected me has had... mixed results. Some people, when they genuinely care about you, will work to be better. Some won't if they don't take your worries to heart. It is still worth having the conversation, just so you know where you stand. If you do want to talk to your mother-in-law, there are certain things you need to do. 1) Establish what it is you want to talk about, and what you want to get out of the conservation. Be specific. Do you want her to stop commenting on your job, or ringing all the time? Do you want her to stop undermining you? How, specifically, can this be prevented? 2) Avoid words like 'always' and 'never'. These 'rules' imply an inability to change, and make many defensive. Things like 'I don't appreciate when...', or 'Maybe instead of... we could...' 3) Explain what this conversation means for your relationship. Does this conservation mean you never want to speak to her again? Probably not, in the grand scheme of things. 4) If you feel you need it, make notes! (Not too many, that can be seen as rude.) It might help to keep a track of what you want to say. 5) Ask for support from your partner, if you feel comfortable doing so. I hope this helps, and feel free to talk to me should you need to!

You would definetly have to be kind and compassionate about it. And it 100 percent depends on what you feel she needs to back off on. But Begin the conversation showing where it needs to go with something along the lines of "hey, we really need to talk about (whatever you need to talk about)." even if it gets frustrating you need to make sure you are calm and collected. dont raise your voice to her. Just be sure she knows that you mean buissness too. "Hey, it may be beneficial for the both of us if you were to give me a little bit of space on (what you need space on)" thats my best answer.

You can tell your mother in law to back off in a cordial manner and by having a chat about things. Give her a chance to talk as well. She will be grateful you placed your trust in her to have this conversation. Remember to not make it about you. She needs to feel that hr needs are met as well. Have you ever heard about self-interest. Give her something she likes in exchange for something you may want from her. Self-interest is what we all need to be fulfilled. When someone is kind enough to see our needs we immediately see this person as an ally,

Talk to her patiently and kindly, don't piss her off, as it'll only make the situation worse. Explain to her what's going on and why you want it to stop. Again, say it in a nice way, or it could escalate things drastically. If you want your relationship with her to be better, I highly recommend not pissing her off whilst asking her to back off. Even if you don't care for that relationship, it's still a good idea, so she doesn't do something nasty like spread rumors about you and shit like that. In-laws are like that sometimes.

Approach her in a way that its clear you are explaining something to her and whatever you are going to say is not up for conversation (but its best to do this respectfully). Your intent is to set boundaries with her and it might be best to walk her through your thought process. For example: 'I feel x when you do x and I would appreciate if you could respect this boundary that I have and stop xxx.' Elaborate more if you can do so but don't be afraid to let her know exactly what it is you are feeling

Be honest and friendly. Do not say it when you are angry. Politely ask for some space as you consider her feelings too. Also, try to understand her point of view. Understanding her better could help you get a hang of things and prevent further conflict escalation. I would speak with her, try to understand her, try to know her intentions. Sometimes, when we think someone is wrong, we could be the one doing the wrong thig. So I would analyze the situation. If my mother in law is wrong, I would give her the option of working on her attitude or simpley giving me some space.

Boundaries can be tough especially with in laws. First, I want to say, your feelings are valid even if others aren't respecting them. Part of communicating to others when they offend us is about focusing on what outcome we want out of the situation and not letting the other person force us to concede more than we feel comfortable with. When communicating our feelings, it is helpful to focus on the behavior and why it is upsetting. If you don't feel comfortable talking to them directly it is also okay to write a letter. Sometimes this is useful when trying to communicate with someone who doesn't allow room for you to speak. Having these conversations is tough, I encourage you to be kind to yourself.

What specifically is making you feel like you need space? Is there a reason that you feel she is effecting you negatively. If you haven’t had a conversation with her yet, it’s a good idea to let her now how your feeling and why. When approaching her make sure to be calm and gentle. Come into the conversation with an open mind and a ready to listen attitude. This will make your conversation go a lot more smoothly. When addressing family it’s important to come out of a place of love. Make sure you are understanding and open this will make for a hopefully smoother conversation.

You can always tell her politely by saying "it's our personal issue, we know how to solve it, we don't need your opinion here because it's my family not yours." We are trying to safe our marriage here so please don't add up more to it. Seat and confronting this mother in law of yours might help her to get closure on what she's doing right now, I understand clearly she worried about her kid's but interfering in their personal family issue are over her limits, it may make the situation even more worst than solving it. If this technique don't work than i don't know how else to fix your marriage.