I'm dating someone who has cheated in the past. What should I do?

At 7 cups, listeners are not allowed to give advice but there are many ways to do in this tough situation. First of all, I'm very sorry that you are in this mess. It must be tough and super frustrating. I think you should assesses your situation and work from there. Should you cut him/her off totally? Should you talk to him/her and see what happened regarding the cheating? How did you find out about this and do you think this is a common thing that occurs? There are many routes and thoughts to consider so think about it :)

Cheating may bring loads of issues and even be emotionally, mentally challenging for someone who had been cheated. We should take time in knowing the person first before dating them. Everyone deserves a second chance. Do not let people’s past to define who they are today. Best thing to do is, give yourself a chance to know them without being biased about their past. Know them better first and see how things will work. We may feel unsecured about them being faithful and loyal becuase they cheated some time in ther lives but we cannot just live and depend on our ‘‘What if’s’’. Give the personthe chance to prove himself and his intentions. Not everyone stays the same forever. Besides, everyone learns from their mistakes.

This is a tricky, but really good questions. I assume you are talking about having sexual relations with someone else as the occasions arise. Normally, people who have cheated with previous partners do not disclose it to a new date, but in this case, this person has. What you would want to know is why and how it happened so you can discern if it is close to a normal behaviour on the part of your new date or if it came with extraordinary circumstances. In my experience (and I am 68 by now), people who have cheated in the past tend to do it again, while others NEVER cheat no matter what.

Everyone makes mistakes but someone makes those, again and again, it depends on how you feel he treats you as an individual. Does he hide a lot of things from you? Is he ever open about things he does or what he feels? Dp you feel you can trust him no matter what situation it is?If he cheated in the past, has he told you why and under what circumstances? was he forced or did he do it knowingly, hurting the other persons feelings? Theses are several possible questions you can ask yourself and it is always best to talk it out if you have theses concerns with him.

I am not sure why you feel you should do anything? If you've made a decision to date someone who has cheated in the past, you made a decision to be with that person. If you are going to continually question whether or not your partner is cheating or will cheat - you will never have a meaningful relationship - as relationships are built on trust (among other things). I think what you need to ask yourself is can I trust this person? Do I feel they are going to cheat - if you do, you might want to reconsider the relationship before it goes to far.

listen to what is in your heart and even more importantly, what's been missing....you are the captain of your ship and the only one who can ever tell you what to do. when you have any issues at all, emotionally or physically, spiritually or otherwise......pick one. Work on the biggest one first. Then move down to the next one. Soon, all of these issue will combine into one. You will see how they are interconnected. At that point, you have a much better chance of understanding, seeing, feeling the whole picture. Which is really all we are all here for.

I can not speak for anyone and their experience. However remember that is okay, to feel how you feel and to expresses these feelings to the person you are with! Maybe you could try and have an open discussion with the person you are with. To discuss what happened in the past and to have an open mind when moving forward. Also try not to hold what happened in their past against them, just have these conversation as something to help your future. Sometimes when these thoughts creep in, remain calm and just try and breathe! Remember your both human and make mistake but to move forward together!!

being in a relationship requires trust. Trust is a key component. If you cannot trust your S/O, then how will your relationship work out? You must communicate and ask for reassurance. Try and be open, talk to them about it. Ask them to explain what happened, why it happened, how it made them feel. Myself personally, I have been cheated on and cheated on a S/O. It is not something I’m proud of. But I can proudly say my experiences have given me lots of perspective on relationships. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now. We are as healthy as can be. He knows I have cheated in the past and he accepts that, because he trusts me. We communicate and I make sure to reassure him and make him feel safe. In any relationship, there is always a possibility the S/O might not be faithful, and going into a relationship you have to be prepared to be hurt. It isn’t all sunshine and rainbows. There’s always ups and downs. To be in a relationship, is to risk being hurt in order to be loved. In my opinion, I think worrying over whether a person will be faithful or not is a waste of time. You cannot prevent a person from their own personal choices and urges. It is out of your control. Trust, honesty, communication, that’s what makes a good relationship. If you’re busy overthinking and worrying, and not talking to them about it, it will just take you away from the reason you’re with them in the first place. it will cause a drift. Talk to them. Tell them about how you’re feeling.

I would break up with him/her so you won't get hurt in the relationship. Because a relationship is about trusting your partner not stabbing them in the back. And you didn't really want the person and non did you love that person. And if you loved them u wouldn't be cheating on them but some times it's good to let someone go when they cheat because you don't want them to come back and they start telling you that they love you they don't so don't let then back into your life so they can mess it up again. So be yourself and don't let anyone control you.

A lot if people go through it. I personally feel that the person who cheated on you should be ashamed, emphatically speaking, I understand. You should try to move on from that person and their mistakes and not keep the person in your life because the person will betray your trust again and again. You should not let such toxic people in your life because that might affect your mood the vibes in your life too. Make the right choice for your future self and you will always be happy with the outcome. Don't feel too negative and be hopeful.

I would seek a therapist or counselling. It would be hard to build trust and build that foundation again. Only you is the expert in your life and feelings. Everything will depend if you are willing to forgive give a second chance or move on. Sometimes, feelings and emotions can be deceiving, we must assess our mental health and always do and decide whatever's beneficial for our own health. If you decide to forgive and give that person a second chance, it's important that the person is willing to change and values the relationship. It's always easier to escape but if you are both willing to work on it then it's still possible to heal and reconcile. But if you feel like the damage has caused you a lot then it's time to move on.

everything is a lesson learned, & the lesson you’ve learned should always help you with your second choice. you may need to allow yourself time before you truly make a permanent decision! if the cheating happened before you were involved; i would build your own trust of that person and go from there. whatever you decide make sure that it is truly YOUR CHOICE. no one can determine your path, take your time in finding what you truly want in a relationship. if you feel the trust is 100% there then by all means you should go for what you want.

Ask yourself, can a zebra change it's stripes? No. So to answer the question, if they have a history of cheating, they can more than likely cheat than not. That isn't to say they definitely will. I hope that makes sense without sounding contradicting. A relationship works if both individuals are communicating to the other effectively and trying to make things work. Being with someone regardless of who they are shouldn't be challenging, although for some it can be. Depends on their personalities too and what their goal is with you. Is the relationship worth it? Consider what would you do if that person cheats and how well can you handle such situations. Sounds like an over-thinking type of answer, but its realistically life. Good luck !

It must feel very anxious to date someone who has cheated on you. I suggest you to really look out for the person in terms of actions,words and etc. If you feel any suspicion, talk to the other person about it. Trust is the most important thing to have in a relationship. Although it may not be easy, gain their trust. However, if you feel that there is something they did wrong to you or have any suspicion, it is okay to let them know and end the relationship. It is not worth it to be someone who will cheat on you or have chances of them cheating on you if they show constant signs of it. However, if it is evident that they have learned from their mistake in the past, stay with them. Everyone makes mistakes and they could have made a mistake. If you have any additional questions, feel free to leave them here for the community

I would try and have an honest conversation with them and discuss how their cheating on you would make you feel. You have to build up trust and honesty with this person to help ensure that they are trustworthy and will not complete the same mistake that they did in the past. Try and keep the relationship open and honest. This way, you both can be honest if either one of you does make a mistake and can tell each other. Keep each other accountable for mistakes and clearly state what behavior is not tolerated by you, such as cheating.

It is all about trust. If you think that person is going to do that do you then maybe you should leave them and if think that you can believe them then there would have been no question I think. So just talk to them and ask them that if they would ever cheat on you and then you will know what to do. If you genuinely like them then you will be able to overcome it. But if you think that this doesn't help feel free to talk to someone here and any of us would be happy to help you.

It depends on you as a person. Do you think this guy deserves a second chance and has really changed? If you do, then go ahead! All of this depends on the type of relationship you have with this guy. Do you think he regrets what he did in the past? If he does, then of course try and give him a chance! Everyone deserves a chance to redeem themselves. But if you think that by doing this you’ll feel insecure or anxious about him cheating again, then put yourself first, always. At the end of the day it’s only your happiness that matters and nothing else.

People can change and we should not judge someone by their past, but if you can't trust him/her you should break up before getting too attached. You do not need to thing about your friends or family opinion or what people are gonna say. Just ask yourself if you really think this person is trustful and if you really feel safe with them. If the answer is yes then give them a chance, if no then don't blame yourself for leaving them. You have the full right to choose who to be in a relationship with. Trust your gut feeling.

Life is too short to worry about everything that comes on out way so is your past too . If that person really loved you then he wouldn’t have cheated. Now it’s very hard for him to earn his trust back . It would be hard for you to think straight and you have to be scared of him leaving you again . So let it go and live a life which you would love to do . Holding him back is not going to help you in anyway . Be happy and just chill your life my dear . Think about it.

it really depends on you, do you want to date someone who cheated in the past? do you trust this person enough to date them. Often times in these cases, one of the partner tend to be anxious most of the time no matter what the other person does since it's already engraved in your mind that the person has cheated and before and you would only keeping on doubting their every move. When it comes to relationships, trust is the fundamental block and without it, it can leads to harsh breakups and constant fights. At the end it really is your decision

This is up to you. What are you comfortable with and are you able to trust your partner? Infidelity is damaging to a person in so many ways, leaving you with feelings of insecurity, mistrust, sadness and anger. These can fester and emotionally crumble a person if they are not addressed and properly dealt with. Talk to your partner. What are their wants and needs in the relationship and tell them yours. If after discussing these points you want to proceed with the relationship, then you’ve made the decision to trust. Be fair to your partner and allow them to be true and honest with you, avoiding constant wonder and accusations. Seek professional help if you find this difficult to manage on your own, to learn coping strategies on how to get past the issue. Working with your partner toward the same goal is important and trust has to be there for that to be successful in making a future together.

Did you find out about that by surprise or did he actually tell you that ? if it's the latter , i think you can forgive him because maybe he has changed. and people do change. However, You have to decide tho are you okay with or will you always keep doubting him, because no relationship can be sustained with trust issues. You could voice your concern about this for him. Don't overthink about it. If he fails to make you feel safe, then you should just leave him and find someone else. it's as easy as that.

Make it *extremely* clear what your boundaries are, what you consider as cheating, what they consider as cheating, and make it very clear that if they do cheat on you, you're leaving without a second thought. If they value you and the relationship the two of you have built together, they will put in the effort and dedication into the relationship and, ideally, not cheat. People don't often ruin the things they worked hard on. You're dating this person for a reason. Remind yourself and your partner what that reason is, and make sure there's mutual trust by regularly checking in and being consistent in communication.

First of all, someone who cheated in the past may not do so now. Maybe they learnt from their mistake, maybe they weren't happy in their previous relationship( I know even then, cheating is not an answer) or maybe their were circumstances that you don't know about. If you trust that person and they do too, you shouldn't worry yourself with such thoughts. If your relationship is just in the beginning phase, try to analyze their behavior(this doesn't mean spying) and look for red flags, if any. Even still if you aren't convinced about this, try talking about this to your partner, but don't make them play the villain, try to make it subtle and ask what made them do what they did previously and also tell about how much this has been bothering you, if they fail to tell or are uncomfortable- that is a red flag!

You should be true to your own relationships standards. If you feel good about his past, keep going, if you feel like you'd rather date someone who didn't cheat in the past, then break up with this person. At the end, everything is up to your own boundaries. You could also ask your partner about this infidelity to provide you with better understanding. Remember you can never predict other's behavior but you can always choose what standards are a must for you to comitt to a relationship. We have all made mistakes in the past and the most important thing is to learn about then.

Part of the question is -- has that person cheated on you personally. Or has that person just had infidelity issues before. Have you talked to your partner about your concerns of this happening and becoming a problem? To communicate with your partner about these concerns is vital to figuring out how to best continue your relationship without that being a heavy concern on your mind all the time. If your partner had an isolated incident, versus multiple-- those are factors to consider and discuss. At the end of the day, it's about knowing the two of you can trust the other and that boundaries are respected.

You should assess your options. You know yourself best, and what you need from a relationship. I can't entirely tell what the situation is, but from what you've said, it sounds like they confided in you that they have cheated before. That can take a lot of courage to reveal to a current loved one. But then again, it completely depends on how you found out about these circumstances. You should think about whether you're happy in your relationship despite what you've learned. Even then, you need to think about what you want in a relationship, and have a good conversation with this person about the future of your relationship with them.

Well, it depends on the person. What were his motivations for cheating? I mean, I'm not at all justifying cheating, but the context is extremely important in determining whether if he did it once, he'll do it again. I'd say the best thing to do is to sit down with him and talk about it. If you leave it in the air, you may end up fostering these negative feelings to the point of resenting him, in turn souring the relationship. But if you talk to him, you can decide whether or not you can trust him enough to not constantly worry whether or not he's being faithful to you. At the end of the day, trust is the foundation of any relationships. If you can't trust him, it'll only be toxic.

Cheating is not a mistake it is a choice. I consider cheating as the most disrespectful thing a person can do in a relationship. If a person doesn’t respect you they don’t love you. Try to cut the cod. I know it’s hard then it’s said. But you are closing the doors for the person who will actually love and respect you. If it was a mistake you would have forgiven him but this was his choice to cheat on you, this will keep on repeating in you mind. Also, you won’t be able to be happy at all. Remember to take care of yourself as you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Communication is the single most important thing. Express your thoughts and feelings and allow them to do the same. Make sure this takes place in a safe space - ask them "are you free to talk right now or can we schedule this in soon?" They may feel like their past is haunting them and you may feel scared they could repeat their actions but by being open and honest with each other - you are both on the same side and you both know what the other expects as a partner. This also ensures that you are both having needs and expectations met which can prevent feelings of tension and resentment. Open up - allow space - trust in them