I'm dating someone who has cheated in the past. What should I do?
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Last Updated: 05/15/2022 at 5:43pm
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Top Rated Answers
Keep communication linesv open between you. Take one step at a time. Breathe. Build your trust together .
Be careful. They may have learned from it, but they could also still be a cheater. If it makes you too uncomfortable, then you have every right to leave them. Otherwise, it may be worthwhile to talk to them about it.
Anonymous
May 15th, 2022 5:43pm
You need to cut off toxic people. If they cheated once who's to say they wouldn't do it again. You don't deserve to go through that pain again. Find someone who's going to but you number one because you don't deserve to be any less than that. Just remember that you are enough and someone else opinion on you does not define your self worth. Be confident enough to stand up for yourself. You deserve to have closure and to be with someone who will respect you at all times. Cheating is never an option and the fact that this person ever thought it was is a major red flag.
Anonymous
March 23rd, 2018 9:58pm
Learn to trust that individual, be cautious but don't invade their privacy. Trust is so important c:
If someone has cheated in the past you should maybe monitor them just to make sure. If they really want to stop cheating and say they won't anymore ask them if you can install an iPhone tracker to make sure that when they go out they don't and maybe have a car tracker too. All through this, all might be a little too drastic if they want to get better and they say they do they will let you. Or if you are a really trusting person you don't have to go and do that, but still, keep an eye out on them just in case. ;)
Talk to them about this, and ask to check text messages and/or ask them to be honest with you. Most likely they will be honest.
Anonymous
March 31st, 2018 7:07pm
Give them a chance and be completely honest and straightforward with them, if they cheat leave them the second you find out. People can change but just be careful as they may not have changed yet.
Anonymous
April 5th, 2018 3:52pm
Dating someone with a checkered past should not be used to judge a current event in your own life. Simply you have to respect the person as the relationship slowly becomes stronger and stronger there is a such thing as Second Chances if one truly believes in second chances as they would love and want for those second chances to happen to you we must learn to adapt to a brand new change and that is known as a fresh start. Am I honest opinion no person on this Earth is perfect in everything everybody has a flaw some hide those laws very well While others make it very obvious. But it's totally up to one person if they truly want that relationship to happen
Anonymous
April 7th, 2018 4:17am
If you love them, even if it's a sensible situation, go for it! That was a different phase of their lives, with a different person. Of course, if you feel insecure about that, talk with them, communication's the key to any relationship. Just remember that mistakes are a natural thing to any human being, and we learn with them. Wathever your decision is, I wish you the best of luck!
Let bygones be bygones. If that person did something in past. Doesn't mean he she will repeat it. But if you have this fear, be open about it n tell this to your partner
Anonymous
April 11th, 2018 7:35pm
If you know the person for a good time, try to get to know his/her intentions, or have a good talk :)
I believe everyone deserves a 2nd chance, despite their past, despite their mistakes they have made in the past. You might have doubts, you might have worries but this "Once a cheater, always a cheater" stuff I believe is wrong. Everyone can change, If they want to be with you and love you truly then they will show it and prove it, actions prove much more than words
Anonymous
April 18th, 2018 8:46pm
I would ask myself can I forgive that person? Can I trust in that person again? Because if the answer it's no I think it would make things complicated.
Anonymous
April 22nd, 2018 10:16am
One thing one has to understand that, there isn't anybody out there who hasn't made any mistakes. The beauty lies in forgetting and giving the person the space to learn from the mistake.
Firstly you shouldn't get too attached not too just people who cheated in the past but anyone you date in the start. Secondly if he has learned from his mistakes and you're sure he did there's not much to be worried if he learned from his mistakes and moved on. By time pay attention to the things he says and test his loyalty.
I am currently in a relationship in which I have been cheated on. I suggest making it apparent on what you are insecure with and affirming your partner that you will not stand with treatment that is any less than what you expect. It is important to keep your standards high, and if cheating is something you are not fond of, let them know. Obvious trust and communication issues will arise, and I advice that you address them. Remember, depending on the severity of the situation you are in, if you are not satisfied with how you are treated, know that you never have to stay. If your partner is willing to put in the time, patience and effort to correct and fix any cracks in your relationship alongside you, it is worth your time. If they are not willing to be a positive person in your life, a toxic relationship is not worth it. Stay strong, and if you need any further advice, let me know. :)
Anonymous
June 10th, 2018 1:27am
It is important to make sure he/she wont cheat on you, u can ask why he/she cheated before if he/she is comfortable with that.
Establishing trust is one of the hardest things in a relationship. And if your partner has already had misgivings about trusting people then it just becomes doubly difficult. So to ease the pressure of trust on your partner you should start by letting them inside your shell. You open up to them, because its a two way game. First you give trust then the other person gives you their. Do activities that show commitment, make long term plans etc.
Anonymous
July 4th, 2018 1:08am
Be cautious and make sure they are in the relationship for you and respect you. It will take time to build up that trust again but it will be for the best.
Anonymous
June 27th, 2018 7:13pm
You should give him chance and alot of time and love so that he don't have time to think about cheating but would think to love you more
If they have cheated with you than you should do what your gut it telling you. If they have cheated in the past with someone else I would remain cautious, but wouldn't hold it against the person. People do change, maybe they're not a cheater anymore.
Anonymous
June 24th, 2018 10:29am
If they cheated in the past, well, it's most likely they will do it again. They must've been all lovey-dovey with their previous partners but still craved for more. No exception on you. Just be careful around them.
Anonymous
June 17th, 2018 10:02am
I think it all depends upon trust. If you think your partner made a mistake, would be apologetic and not go into infidelity again, you can lower your walls and let them in, even if you do that a bit cautiously.
Talk to them about how you fee. See if you guys can work through things or not. A big key to healthy relationships is communication
Anonymous
May 23rd, 2018 8:04am
If you trust them then there shouldnt be a problem. Trust in relationships is extremely important so if theres no trust, there needs to be a conversation where you talk about the issue.
If your partner shows a genuine willingness to put effort in and establish trust in the relationship again, give them a chance. However, if they try and put the blame on you for not 'recovering' from their mistake quickly enough, do not give you time to process your emotions, and generally try and pile guilt on you, it is time to leave.
People usually cheat when they are not feeling loved in their relationship. Make sure that your partner doesn't feel the same way. You can show them how much you care for them in many ways.
Anonymous
July 12th, 2018 1:38pm
I say give them a chance! Maybe that person has learned from their mistakes? But if you ever feel uncomfortable, be clear on ending it!
Unless you feel safe and trust them, it is fine to continue.If they have shown any signs that lead to doubt ,please discuss or ask them right away and then you can decide if you want to continue or not.
Anonymous
June 9th, 2018 12:06am
Be wary, but not suspicious. Don't make super left-field assumptions based on their history. In fact, address your potential concerns with your partner, as communication is key in a relationship. If you're worried about their devotion, then they should know about that so they can better manage how they act so you'll trust them. Communication is key.
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