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Hope Hadding, MSW, LCSW
Clinical Social Work/Therapist
I am a professional therapist with extensive experience working with various mental health disorders as well as sexual issues. I am supportive and non-judgmental.
Top Rated Answers
You need to ask yourself if you're going to cheat again. If you can't be loyal to them, then maybe you should consider ending the relationship you have with them.
Before you decide about a break up, you should first try to listen to your heart and ask yourself what is the reason for you cheating - could it be that you are unhappy with your relationship? Why? How can it be repaired? The second step - talk about it openly and honestly with your partner. It will be hard and it will most probably hurt, but a good relationship is an honest one. This way whatever decision you will make, you will know that you did your best to stay truth with both yourself and your partner.
I think that only one person can tell you if you should breakup and that is your partner!
You should be honest with them about what you did, and let them decide.
If it was an act of impulse, breaking up with them might not be the answer. Yet, if you feel your relationship hasn't been fulfilling, and that led you to cheat, it is best for you to break up before it becomes a burden and hurt not only you, but your partner as well.
A quote that has been floating around the internet speaks volumes to this situation:
When in love with two people, pick the second, because if the first was good enough--there wouldn't be number two.
Follow your heart. Ask yourself what was missing. Is it something you and your partner can fix?
Ultimately, you need to discover your own truth--be honest and it will play out. There will be hurt--but it's better than deepseeded resentment.
Anonymous
January 9th, 2016 1:39pm
Just think one more time whether you want to cheat your partner in future. If you are willing to stay loyal for your partner from now on, you do not have to let your partner anything about it.
Try to talk about it with your partner, why did you do it? Unless you don't feel for that person anymore.
Talking about problems is the best thing you can do.
Anonymous
February 10th, 2016 5:10pm
You should talk about it with your partner - and help your partner get through it, because it is important not to leave him or her alone.
No. You need to forgive yourself and start talking with your partner. An affair isn't the problem. It is only a symptom of a problem. Need to talk with the partner about what you need and your relationship .
If you cheat after being in a relationship, that is not fair at all but if you ask to break up or not then it is depending on your partner and situation. 1. If you are feeling Good after cheating or enjoyed it then break up immediately but if you are feeling guilty and sad then 2. If you love and respect your partner a bit then you should confess it that you cheated. If your partner can forgive you then fine otherwise move on. (All the answer and thinking is according to LoveApple, it's my thinking so if it hurts anyone I'm sorry, don't listen)
Anonymous
March 18th, 2016 4:20am
Loyalty and trust are 2 major parts to relationships. Cheating breaks both of those, you probably should. Usually when you love somebody you wouldn't cheat. If you feel like things can be repaired, you can try but don't string that person along if you feel that you can't commit.
Anonymous
December 9th, 2015 12:16am
Communication is something that is very important in a relation so from experience I think telling your partner about it is very important. You can then talk to him about it and see where things go. Also it is important to ask yourself if you still want to be with that person or not?
Anonymous
October 26th, 2015 9:49pm
Not your decision, but I'd say leave it up to your partner whether or not to forgive you and give you another chance or give it up to them to see if they shall end it if they feel uncomfortable being with you from now on.
If you regret doing that then you must apolize to your partner and make them belive that you wont do that again...but once the trust is lost its gone forever...they will never see you the same way they used to see
Cheating is not the solution. It depends if you think that is best for your partner. Talk to your partner and be honest with them. It's better to tell them than them finding out themselves. So be honest and loyal :)
The first thing you should do is tell your partner. When your partner knows the facts, you will know how things should be. Your partner may forgive you and still want to be with you but it really depends on the situation. If the person you cheated with is someone you would rather be with than your current partner than obviously you should be with them if they make you feel better or you don't feel any regrets. You should not break up with your partner without telling them that you cheated, though. Although not telling them might seem like it would same them some pain, they deserve to know.
You should have broken up with them before Cheating . If you and when you love someone . You do not . Break their hearts because you chose to be selfish .. My ex Fiance recently cheated on me .. And well its his lost now .
Yes you should. Unless you let your partner know what you did. Put yourself in the shoes of the other side., Would you like to be lied to ?
Anonymous
January 10th, 2016 1:28pm
if you cheated because you no longer love your partner , it's better to be honest and break up ... if it was a mistake just tell him/her and ask for forgiveness .. if they love you they will forgive you , altough they might take some time
Anonymous
December 30th, 2015 8:59am
You should tell him and, if he-she still wants to be your partner, decide between both of you if going on with the relationship is worth it.
No , because their is lot before conclusion , first talk about it analyse , give yourself and the other some time , seek advice from few near and dear if you can talk , analyse with cool mind on careful analysis take your decision.
Anonymous
January 15th, 2016 6:48pm
if you confess with your partner about cheating upon him/ her and get apologised then its okay to continue
No you shouldn't break with your partner, you should be honest and tell him/her you cheated and what's the reason behind it.
Anonymous
January 16th, 2016 3:16pm
I think before you break up with your partner think yourself first why you have cheated and what makes you do that are you going to cheat again does he or she deserves that if you have children what happened to them before destroy everything just think it over again sit with your partner confess it communication is the best policy be honest then see what happens.
Anonymous
January 15th, 2016 11:25pm
This depends on how you feel about how you cheated. Being honest with your partner and letting them make their own decision may be a way forward. If you are unable to move on from it and it is making the relationship difficult then breaking up may be the best option
You should come clean and tell them that you are sorry. Just tell the truth. If you want them to stay just tell them that you are very sorry and regret it.
You should be honest with your partner, and talk about both your feelings once the initial shock has passed.
From personal experience, I found it best to simply be honest with my partner that I have cheated. After you know what they say, the truth will set you free. Normally, there are two ways that this conversation could go. Number 1: You tell your partner that you have been unfaithful, they are upset but are willing to give you another chance seeing as you came clean and owned up to your mistake, or Number 2: You tell your partner you have cheated and they are upset and say that they can not be with you anymore. I am not saying this will definitely happen but this is how it normally goes down. Hope this helps :)
no, you should sit down and ave a conversation with them, to determine the next steps of the relationship. It might be hard, but worth it in the end.
You should come clean to your partner and leave your partner if you are unhappy with them. Cheating is something this generation does not take lightly. It is understandable that people get urges to want to do stuff with other people but in a relationship, you are meant to stay committed to that one person.
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