I can't get over my ex after 5 years. What should I do?

Break ups are always tough, especially if they didn't end very well. Not getting closure would definitely effect how each person would move on. Sometimes meeting new people would only remind you of you last partner. Maybe it would be beneficial to talk to your ex and ask to talk about how things ended. It might lift some weight off of your shoulders, and maybe even their shoulders too. If that's not an option talking to close friends about how it's still hurting you could be beneficial as well. If it continues for a longer time, therapy could help you find resources to deal with these emotions and this difficult time for you.

You should probably be focused on other activities. Especially socially. Meet new people, especially with the gender that attracts you and focus on relationships with them. This will be easier each time you do that! :)

Keep an open mind about things. Everything happens for a reason wether they are good or bad. Hope this helps

Try thinking about the time that you 2 had problems, do you think he could change? If you do, then try to rekindle the relationship where the fears and loneliness will go away.

You can do things that make you happy or you can talk to me about it. I'll try my best to put myself in your shoes and understand the situation.

To truly get over your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend, you need to take time to focus on yourself and your self growth. Once you are happy being alone, you will be able to move on.

Hi, thank you for the question. A break down of a relationship is never easy. No matter how many break ups we have, we never seem to get used to the pain we feel. I'd like you to know that there is no specific time limit on how long it will take to accept a relationship being over. It can be true that the longer the relationship, the longer it can take to move on from. It can be more so if the couple were/still are married. But each relationship is different. Is there something specific you are holding onto? Perhaps a specific memory, a specific item? You've seen articles or at least heard ways about how to get over an ex, I'm sure. They all will have key points. One being cut off all contact. And I will second that. If you've already done this, GREAT! If you're struggling with the temptation of contacting them, or are struggling to quit contacting them... I understand. It can be so tough. There are different types of grief/loss. They all have one thing in common. Stages. When we lose something there are 5 stages that we all cycle through- Denial, Anger, Bargaining , Depression, Acceptance. Denial: Disregarding the fact that there is a break up. Not accepting the truth. Anger: Feeling angry towards your ex or the relationship. This could be in the form of arguments, especially arguments that have/had happened after the break up. Bargaining: This could be the time you start to feel at blame, maybe feeling you were responsible for the break up. And start imagining "what if" scenarios. Depression: The heartache. In my opinion the toughest stage to get through (but also the most rewarding once you're past it) Acceptance: accepting the situation and being hopeful for the future I mention this because it can be really beneficial to identify how we are feeling about the break up. And being able to identify what stage we are on can help us achieve our final goal: acceptance. Some stages will repeat themselves. For example you could feel angry towards your ex and the relationship and then feel low about your break up, which could then go back to feelings of anger. It's important that we allow ourselves to cycle through the motions and to never rush ourselves through each stage (even the repeated ones). If you need to cry. Let it out. It's no good holding back those tears, it only prevents you from moving on. You say it has been 5 years since your break up. So I am sure that you have at least experienced a few of these stages throughout the years. Can you identify what stage you're currently on? What feelings or thoughts do you associate with this stage and why do you think you are thinking or feeling this way? These are just a few questions you could ask yourself. If you can answer any of them this could help you understand your own emotions which in turn could help you control them and think differently about the break up. I wish you all the very best 🙂 (It does get better)

Seek a refreshed situation. Stay somewhere different for a week, do something you've never done before. Sometimes our brains need reminding that life is moving forward and that we cannot stay stuck in the same place.

find a better partner. have new life goals. and accept it some part of relationship you will always miss - ofcouse it was a relationship - even worst relationships has some elements. But please find someone for yourself. Someimes people rather than missing other person just miss being in the relationship.

Don't dwell on your feelings or memories of that person too much. It can cloud your brain and confuse you. Surround yourself with things to occupy yourself, this will help you to move on

try new things, spend time with your friends and family, try a new hobby, practice coping skills such as journaling or reading, when a relationship ends, we grieve it like a death

You may not have gotten closure. It might help to talk to your ex and get all your feelings out in the open.

The most likely reason why you cannot get over your ex is because somwhere inside you, you are still holding on to some hope or chance that he will come back. Only if you choose to consciously let go of that hope, only then can you move into the here and now., the present moment which is the only reality.

The emotions that we develop in a relationship can become so deeply embedded in us. They don’t just evaporate overnight – especially when the breakup was a painful one. The pain that we experience during a breakup is comparable to what we feel when we lose a loved one. It is in essence the process of mourning the death of your hopes and dreams for a future with someone.Delete him from your life for a while, and move on. Slowly but surely, you'll get there. Go out with friends, take risks and meet new people. Whatever you do, do not let your ex hold you back

Everytime her thought comes you have two choices, think about her or stop and distract yourself to YOUR life. Focus on YOUR LIFE until you see your break up as a step toward your happiness..

Just be you. Breakups are hard. I won't lie to you. But you need to give yourself a time to grieve or as I put it a bandaid period. Some people only need a week some it will take a lifetime. Just give your heart a chance

Get a life. Venture out to meet new people. Allow yourself to feel the negative emotions and think the negative thoughts

I have been in a very similar situation and in all honesty getting over a break up is very hard. However, its important to think of it as a new opportunity for you to get to know yourself and meet some great and amazing friends along the way. But also don't be afraid to get back out there and try to make connections with other people even though it is a long and difficult process. Your happiness is worth fughting for! I hope that this was helpful to you in some way and that you find the peace that you are looking for.

Sometimes, we as humans have the tendency to overthink and over analyse what we said, did and how we behaved in the past. And while sometimes this is beneficial to better understand where your decisions and choices led you, it does no good to dwell on them excessively. When getting over someone whom you loved and cared for, it takes time and it is a continuous journey. However, having a discussion with your ex about your relationship as a whole might be able to offer closure and help you move on to the next chapter of your life. Try and view this experience as a journey that allowed you to develop as a human and share a part of your life with another individual. And sometimes, the best thing that you can do is just throw yourself out there and talk with other people. But in order to do this successfully, let go of any preconceptions and try to not compare your potential partners to your previous ones. And soon enough, you will find interest in other individuals who will eagerly take you on a new, unpredictable journey.

Perhaps, a good way to go about it is to examine what it is exactly that is keeping you so tied or attached to them. Was there a quality that you cannot find in anyone else? Are there any regrets that are making you come back to them emotionally? Are they associated with a partiuclarly happy or difficult time of your life? Have they done something for you that other people can't or couldn't? There are just so many bindings in relationships that it's worth sitting down going through them thread by thread. Not being able to move on is not always about love, there are many variables that can only be understood by searching your history with a magnifying lens.

New interests and hobbies will help you focus on new things. A couple of people I know instead focused intently on their studies. Distractions, I guess, until you can finally rid your mind of her.

If you have them on social medias, or anything left from your relationship, you should get rid of it all. Block them, tell your friends to not talk about them, try meet new friends and do something different.

The best way to get over someone is to give yourself the chance to meet new people, allow yourself to love again. Go out, talk to other people, have fun, and remember that you will eventually meet someone else who will make you forget all about him/her. You just gotta be patient till the right person steps in.

Getting over an ex is always challenging and it brings up a lot of different feelings. I know that it made me feel like I wasn't worth much and that was the biggest thing for me to work on -- my self worth. Once I worked on my self worth and felt that I was worth something and I was good enough, and working on loving myself, the ex became nothing more than an afterthought.

You should try getting some type of closure not necessarily communication but self awareness to why you feel that this relationship has such a great impact on your life

Five years is a very long time for sure. There could be however few obstacles that are causing you to remain stuck: 1) emotional scars and wounds, and this case since it has been this long I’d suggest seeing a specialist. 2) seeking closure. And this could be the most difficult part to deal with emotionally. In this case you could be waiting for something that may not take place and even may not bring you peace if it took place. Still five years is a long time. And a therapist could be useful in this case too. 3) lastly, it could be that you reached a low level of self esteem. And in this case, I’d do everything to pamper and spoil myself to love and value myself. I’d engage myself in my hobbies, try new hobbies, travel and exercise.

Don't dump on your ex. Your relationship is over. Write a letter to yourself, laying out all your grievances, then destroy it.

You should understand it is ok to miss old relationships, but to put yourself first and know it’s ok to move onto better things for better outcomes. You are not alone just because one person has chosen to move on with their life or you have. You are worthy of love and acceptance and it’s ok if that person could not give that to you. Understand that you can move on and that everything will eventually turn out for you. Keep your head up and give yourself a reason to take a step to getting over this person that you miss. You are worthy.

Maybe you should try harder to forget your ex. I know it is a hard thing to do, but moving on is necessary, especially for your personal happiness. Maybe you should stop talking to ex, that would be a good first start. Then, maybe you should go out and try to meet new people, find new friends and maybe allow yourself to love someone else. It will be hard to move on from someone that you have loved for so long but I'm sure that you will be happy eventually! Sending all the love in the world!

Explore. Get a dating app. If you guys still ain't together, he wasn't worth it in the first place. Start doing something fun to get your mind off things.