How can I stop thinking about him/her? Why my heart hurts so much?

It's difficult to get over someone, specially when you've been so close to them. It feels like a part of you has been separated. I understand and I can relate as I've been through this. Heartbreak is very hurting, and can consume you in thoughts. It becomes difficult to think about other things. But it gets better overtime. As time passes, and your priorities change, you being to think about other things. Expressing gratitude and gratefulness can be really helpful to get over someone. Surrounding yourself with people you love, who care about you and can lift your mood can be helpful as well. Other than that, finding goals and pursuing them is a great way to change your thoughts. When you have goals, you have a purpose and you do whatever you can to achieve that. This helps you focus on your goals, which in turn can help you move on!

Engage in activities that draw your attention and focus. Mental preoccupation can help to offset feelings of sadness or depression while maintaining healthy living habits. Don't bounce into a rebound relationship as this may cause more hard to your emotional health that good. The more you focus on a hobby or new task that interests you, the less you will think of them. Remember that they are not a part of your life for a reason, and you are strong enough to go on without them, regardless of the context of the loss. You will make it through and be stronger for having had the experience.

Many People are not aware about simple things regarding relationships. The moment when we love a person especially the girl and boy relationship. By default , by DNA we develop some huge feelings on other person subconsciously. People always underestimate the feelings on other person but it happens very strongly in our inner selves. So within months time our brain gets into strong bond and when the separation happens , it hurts us the most because love is the top among all emotions when it comes to intensities and impacts. If you get good you feel heaven and if you get bad outcomes you feel hell. So it is always advised to carefully select a person before entering into relationship. Don't treat relationships as some time pass thing or just for entertainment. Because it has severe potentiality to turn lives upside down when something goes wrong. Your subconscious memories won't allow you to forget him/her. It's all that either you need to struggle to deal with them or you need to take any external help to manage those thoughts. Like you can involve your thoughts in constructive sources like yoga , mediation and reading books like autobiography of yogi, which can immensely impact you so that you will be deviated.

There isn't an easy answer. The best way to make progress towards thinking about him less is to acknowledge your feelings, accept them, lean on supports, and engage in interests/hobbies (alone and/or with others). I think this site is one tool that you can use if you need to lean on others for support during a difficult time. These are just general ideas. What helped for me was definitely spending time with others, hanging out, and attempting to fill my time with interests and work. Of course, these things alone are not an instant cure, as time heals all.

yo can stop thinking about him/her if you replace them from your mind, replace them with yourself. think about you happines, your dream your compassion and anything about how you can grow as a person. this is not individualist when you looking for your happines. you can, maybe it takes time, but everything need process. and every person have their own process. someone's process will fast but any others maybe take a long time to letting go. you will pass this hard time, i'm sure you can. someone told me that when we start forget about them whom hurting us, our heart will recovery, try to help another it will be great for your healing process. you strong and i believe you will be stronger after this.

Healing is a process. It won’t happen overnight. It will take time to stop thinking about him/her. It’s important to keep yourself busy doing things you love to do but also allow yourself to not be okay at times. Surround yourself with positive people who won’t remind you of the pain you’re going through. Take time to enjoy the little things like a sunrise or sunset. Take on new hobbies or do something that you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t had the chance to do it. It’s important to remember you are healing and to give yourself some space. Self care in a time of healing is also important. Make sure you are making time for you whether is be a day/night out with friends or family.

it hurts when you can not let go of the feeling that makes you feel that you are not alone. Ending relation can have psychological as well as physical effect which can not be understand by others unless they are going through that stage. Am never really the best advisor when it comes to breakup and relation stress. Though according to study making new friends and going out might be the good idea rather then being locked in the room crying in isolation. Love is hard to come by in this life but do not forget we have one life and we should learn to be happy and fall in love with someone once again. Breakup is like the death you will be reborn as new better person.

There are many great ways to stop thinking about your past relationship. In my case, I would look into meditating. You'll be able to control your thoughts which will allow you stop thinking about them as much. This is important because you become at peace with things that you're going through. Which brings me to my next step. Next, I would work on self care. You have to remind yourself that you're loving and caring; practically fall in love with yourself and find or be reminded of your worth. These two ways will help you after a breakup: Meditation and Self care.

I think you need to get them out of your system completely. You need to cry and cry and then cry some more until you're drained and then one day you won't even notice it, but the hurting will stop and it will become just a nostalgic memory. I believe everyone deals with breakups differently, but it does help to just go through it and let time heal you, let time be the one to make your heart feeling like it's about to explode; I know it must feel like the word is about to crumble around you if you aren't with this person, but at the end of the day it is just another thing that will go by with the wind at some point.

Start with thinking about how you feel, and how you are, to stop thinking about the person, all you need to do is start thinking for yourself. Understand why you must tell the past go, see the cons of going back to that place where you were hurt. Do things that make you happy, and feel good about yourself, and most importantly forgive the person if you are angry or sad because of them. Find support, that's important, it can be a person, it can be a diary or just a playlist that makes you calm and peaceful. And always remember that you'll be okay, because you are brave and a good person.

The best advise was given to me for this exact situation. Heartbreak is hard to overcome, but every time you feel yourself thinking about them - go do something else! Go on a walk, a run, read a book, workout, cook, hang out with someone. The less effort you give the pain, the more likely it is for it to disappear. It may take a week, a month or even a year, but in the end, this person does not define who you are. You are an amazing person that deserves the best and only you can find your way through the heartache in the end.

When someone's been on your mind for so long, you may start to envision all kinds of scenarios that make you like the idea of them even more (I've been there so many times...). Its painful to have to cut them out of your life, especially if they meant a lot to you. Realizing that you have to/want to stop thinking about them in the first place is a great first step. You are self-aware and can now work towards getting over them. The next thing that may help is cutting them out of your life or cutting out things that may remind you of them (like pictures, following them on social media, t-shirts...). Its always difficult at first, but its getting past the first few steps that things start to become easier.

Try to distract yourself by indulging in activities you like with your friends. If being alone is what you like, do that. Try out something new, keep your mind engaged somewhere else because when you sit idle you overthink and the memories of the person keeps coming back and you will start feeling anxious and low. Go to new places and meet new people. Create a good environment around you to facilitate your growth, with people who you like to be around. Develop strength and improve your skills at managing emotions because you may feel very vulnerable right now.

You need to focus on anything that doesn’t bring back memories of what causing you pain try to pick a up a new hobbie excercise always helps it boosts your self confidence lowers areas takes your mind off of things naturally do other activities as well try new experiences that you have never done before this will take time but with the right positive reinforcement constantly it will slowly fade away I’ve been here before any type of healing takes time if done right it won’t be over night but you be back in good shape emotional wise recovering

When we find ourselves fixated on a person, we need to wonder if it is healthy and the reason as to why we are doing it, is it a love interest? A best friend you wanna go do everything with? Heartaches suck, but sometimes we need to go find healthy distractions. Maybe calling or texting with a close friend for advice relating to the issue should be considered. I myself have crushed on a person and found myself fixated on them for a while, but eventually we can push past it and move onto something new, and or if it's appropriate maybe approach the person in a safe manner and take the dive to see what they think.

I can be difficult to deal with thoughts and emotions when we lose someone we once loved. The heart can be broken, but it continues to beat. Suppressing your thoughts and emotions actually has an opposite effect because you concentrate on the very thought you wish to go away. It's like trying to put 1000 spiders into a draw and expecting them to stay there. Take out a pen and paper and purge out your thought and feelings. Write down every emotion until you have exhausted every thought and feeling. Now fold the paper into the shape of a paper airplane and send it away from you; flying in the air until it hits the ground and simply walk away. Next, think about a good time you had in your life before him/her. Stay focused on the positive moment of just being happy with who you are. Continue to do this exercise once a day until the thoughts on paper subside and the paper airplane no longer has to fly away.

Though you might not be able to stop thinking about them right now, or immediately, I know that over time this won't seem so bad. Don't give yourself a rough time by trying not to do something, that is natural like thinking about them. Rather than avoiding all thoughts about them, you could try thinking about things differently. Remind yourself, that this may be hard but you are strong. Regardless of the conflict I have with someone, what makes me feel better is to send them best wishes and let them go from my life. This allows me to lovingly let go as a way of working on the attachment.

I understand that it could be hard at first. But slowly with time you will be alright. Try to find things which makes you happier. Things which you have better focus on. for an example you could try developing your skills like painting, singing etc. Also you can go on a journey/hike to feel free from the ongoing situation. And especially connecting with nature will ease your mind. Try travelling solo if you love exploring new places. that will make you feel free spirited and would improve your self love. And might give you new and cool ideas about how to focus on things which makes you happy. I am sure you will discover new sides of your life by being free spirited that way. If you are not in to nature or travelling, watching movies or tv series which make you laugh would help. eating chocolate, especially the dark ones also help to ease the pain in your heart. I am sure you will be able to move on with your life and feel at ease. Be POSITIVE!

Try distracting yourself, take up a hobby, talk to your friends and family. Meditate. Your will hurt for a while. Give it some time. Take each day as it comes. Wake up every morning saying “ I love myself and I will come out stronger and happier” stay focused on yourself, and believe that you deserve nothing but the best in life. Be it from your spouse or friends or family. Shift focus to work for a while and try doing things that make you happy, like taking a trip with your besties or even alone. Time heals.

Thinking or caring about someone is a burden, but it is not insurmountable. As the old saying goes, “‘tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.”. Your heart hurts because it has been used. You are living life, and loving life, and if that means that sometimes you get hurt, then surely its worth it? I am sorry that you can’t stop think about them. I am. I am assuming that you guys broke up or are in some other way separated from each other. And I am sorry for that. But you should try (even though it is hard) to think about the good things, and not the end.

It is just normal to think about them, when you have been spending so much time together and sharing a lot, we get attached, there might be so many reason to feel in pain, try to focus on the good things that this relationship brought to you, make a list about the reasons to why the separation take place to begin with, if it wasn’t healthy for you, try to focus on healing your self , do activities that will help you keep you mind busy and makes you feel good, have your family and friends around specially those who actually care and support you, in the process of healing you’ll get to love your self again, gain your self confidence back, and get the balance you need.

You cannot at the beginning. You need to help yourself. Watch videos that will help you understand where you went wrong any kind, philosophical, psychological, how to move on. Whatever works for you to accept the fact that you want to move on because that is what is best for you overlooking the pain. Once you take the conscious decision that you want to move forward, set goals for you. Like take up any activity you have been stalling and complete it. Tell yourself, no I will not think about him whenever you find your wandering. Learn a new skill. Do anything and everything you wanted to do for sometime but didn't. Its the best time to complete incomplete tasks. Its not a linear process. You have to remind yourself every day, that you have already taken the decision.

Let your heart first accept the situation, then only day by day it will become lighter on your heart and you will get better day by day. You will find yourself feeling better and being happier again. The heart only hurts when you hold on too tight or if you try and let go of something you not ready to accept or ready to let go and that can cause you to hurt a lot. So crying it out , speaking more about it to professionals or a close friend or family allows you to be more open to understanding and accepting the situation and also making it better for you to set your heart free from the hurt and open to new happiness.

I have learned that sometimes it is easier to keep busy until you are ready to face that hurt. Work on yourself, distract yourself, just do whatever you can to keep your mind off of it. Then when you are ready to face that hurt you can think of all of the ways that the situation is really good for you. I know how hard that is, but if you focus on the good in the situation, you will slowly come to terms with what is happening and you will be better able to move on. Also remember to be patient with yourself and accepting of your feelings.

i feel you, like really feel you in this one and i know exactly how it hurts. i was the same with my ex and i mean like a wound it can be re-opened and when he use to pull other girls it use to be like throwing salt in it. time only heals you,like nature does to a wound, time is our nature and thats all you need. you need to cry it out and you need time to realise that he's gone. its going to be hard and its never going to be any easier when you see him with someone else or not with you because he isn’t with you. but knowing you aren’t alone helps! many people go through this and all my advice is, the only way you’ll ever go on is to carry on. you need to act like you don’t care, you need nights out with your friends, you need space at times to be left alone, you need to have a good laugh and do everything you use to do with him, by yourself so then you get to it being just you. its not horrible but once you accept he's out of the picture and carry on like he's out of the picture you’ll soon forget everything. every now and then i always think back like “what if?” but then i think why do i hurt myself when he's out there not giving a care in the world. why would i torture myself for someone who couldn’t think twice about me? why would i let him stop me from being myself? its wrong and you aren’t alone! i hope this really helps! :) Smile and the world smiles with you!

I removed all things that reminded me of them from my view. All pictures went in a box, I didn’t check their social media, and I put away their letters. I surrounded myself with family and friends who didn’t know the half of it and I was happier with them. It takes time, but eventually you grow past them. Progress takes time and you won’t stop thinking about them overnight because they were a major part of your life at one point. They were a part of your routine, but now they are not. So, you will run into moments where you forget that they aren’t there anymore and that’s okay. Eventually, you will have a new routine.

It may be because you see them every day or have constant reminders of them. There can also be unresolved issues. Closure can simply be the answer to that. Even if you never had a relationship with that person. You had a connection with that person and it may only be on your end. Simply cutting can help or talk it out depending on how things were left between you and that person. If it was a friendship, those are harder to let go of than a romantic relationship. That is because that person was there for you and those connections can be stronger than a romantic one.

When you think about this person you think about all the good times, often the honeymoon phases of a relationship, you do not remember the memories you don’t want to replay such as negative emotions, anxiety and rough times within the relationship. When you come to terms with what is making you miss them, maybe a trigger, similar environment or still being in some form of contact, perhaps a same friend group. You can remove those triggers from your daily life, I'd like to encourage some journaling work about the relationship and negative situations within it and how you have grown without them.

You must have had so many memories together, good and bad. Whatever it is, you've learned so much from it. Letting go of someone you loved is not easy, and whoever is telling you to just get over them, definitely don't know what it's like. But does that mean it's not possible to feel happy again? It is possible, but it will take time, so do not worry if you are feeling this way right now, it is not abnormal. You are where you are supposed to be, and you have a looooong journey ahead of you. Remember there's always people that loves you, even though sometimes it all seems dark and we feel like there's nobody. Love is there constant. Pray that she/he is doing well in their life. And look after yourself. After every pain, comes ease, and in the future you'll tell yourself how this experience made you more stronger and patient as a person. Everything will make sense and you will thank yourself for looking after you. You will realize how resilient of a person you were all along. Infact, the reason you're reading this right now, already proves how amazing you are, ready to help yourself out of this! You will get there I promise ❤️