Why do I feel that I am rejected or neglected by people?
165 Answers
Last Updated: 03/04/2022 at 7:29pm
Moderated by
Tracy-Kate Teleke, PsyD, M.A., LMFT
Marriage & Family Therapist
I assist adults and couples in CA experiencing relationship challenges and interpersonal struggles including anxiety, depression, and a myriad of other life challenges.
Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
March 9th, 2018 11:03am
the feeling of rejection and acceptance are illusions. you are feeling this way because you have done something wrong in the past, or morrally wrong. and maybe because your communication skill is not so good. how to solve this? simple: smile, forgive yourself, help people, live a good life.
According to NVC, a non violent communication process introduced by Marshall B. Rosenberg, a feeling is produced by a need. For example, when needs for connection and companionship are not met, we might feel lonely, anxious and worried. So why do I think that I am rejected or neglected? Probably because some of my needs are not being met. Also, it might be that I was expecting people to behave differently than they actually did. I might also feel frustrated and annoyed. The more you can describe what is actually happening with you and others, the better you can understand what is going on in your mind.
Life comes with rejection and neglect, and people don't always treat others like they should. This is a reflection of them not you.
When a puppy is abandoned in the streets, or a child left dismissed in a home, or a person sat alone on the weekend, none of this affects the innate value of that puppy, child, or person. When someone rejects or neglects you this is a reflection of their character, not yours.
We can only be the best of who we are, and if we are rejected even when expressing our true selves then it is life, not us, that is the cause.
often we feel rejected or neglected because people do not react in the way we expect it from them. low self-esteems makes us needy for higher acknowledgement by others without considering enough that others simply have their own challenges and that's why we do not get the attention we want.
Many people feel this way when one feels like the world is going against them, in my personal experience I take a step back and evaluate the situation and come to terms with the reality in front of me. When I'm feeling rejected or neglected by people I strive to figure out why and I've come to the realization that is typically why I push people away, because I want to find the reason as to why I feel this way. The reason I take the step back is to realize that my overwhelming fear of being rejected causes people to reject me because I feel like I need to thrive on their acceptance.
Destroy who you think you are, to build who you want to be. this is a good quote to go by and lift your head up high
The way you are feeling, that is probably you are thinking or behaving that youre rejected. It is better to look events from that perspective. We interpet the events not as they are unfolding, but through our perspectives. That is one unique kind of explanation for our emotional distress. It is called cognitive behavioural model. By that way we could introspect ourselves and the life events we are experiencing. As in this instance, a person really may get rejected sometimes, but what is the meaning of getting rejected or neglected, and where and how it happened in which context? How many times?
Anonymous
September 16th, 2016 8:38pm
Building up the courage to talk to someone only to have them exchange a few words then walk away makes me feel rejected and as if I'm not good enough to talk or become friends with anyone else in my class, or school.
Anonymous
July 21st, 2018 6:51am
I frequently feel as though I am rejected or neglected by people because I feel anxious to express my likes and interests. It can sometimes make it hard to connect with others and ends in rejection. I am working on being more open about what I enjoy, however!
From experience people who reject or hurt others are being hurt themselves or don’t know how to act around you because they may want to friendly towards you but are to scared.
Anonymous
June 22nd, 2018 1:58pm
Maybe bcoz you haven't accepted yourself completely. When you accept yourself, so will others. Bcoz people can sense it.
Sometimes it helps to carry on and do your own thing without worrying about what other people think. In other words, to get out of your own head and do. Maybe you want to dip your toe in volunteering, learn a foreign language that's always interested you, or learn to play a new musical instrument. 'Doing' may improve your feelings of confidence and self worth. You may even meet other people, who share your interest. As a result, maybe you will start worrying less about what others think of you while fostering pride in yourself for the cool, interesting person you are becoming!
Because of insecurities....that you battle against yourself. We sometimes allow our own faults to pull us into believing others see them and we think that others don't like us because we don't like ourselves .
Anonymous
July 3rd, 2019 7:32am
I feel like I'm being neglected when the person acts as if they are uninterested in me, or ignores me. I feel uncared for. Especially when I feel as if I'm not being given the proper amount of attention necessary. A failure to provide. For example, if I'm feeling neglected from a parent, I feel like they are not fulfilling their duties to feed, nurture and care for me. Which can be a hard emotion to decipher. When I'm lacking in attention and affection I become very upset and frustrated with the other person. I especially feel neglected and rejected when I express these emotions and the other person doesn't care.
Anonymous
November 1st, 2019 4:40am
Because you haven't accepted yourself i think. You look at others to give approval that you look good or you are good. People don't know you accept it. They not acceting you is like illiterate people telling the story in the book is bad by just seeing the pictures. They don't know and they don't need to. You need to know yourself and become the best company you can ever have dor yourself. Their approval is nothing it doesn't count because they judge you on the basis of their own insecurities. If you work hard then they will regret that they didn't and then reject you. Because they know you are better than them and working harder than them
All emotions are based on our perceptions of situations. If your perception is that you are rejected and neglected by people then your mind will always find external situations to prove you right. If you are able to look within yourself and learn why you have this conditioning in the first place, and are able to change the story in your mind, you will be able to open up your story to see a whole new set of people that you did not notice before. The challenge: Are you willing to own your perceptions? If you perceived situations one way, the good news is that you can with patience and hard work learn how to live a life where you are loved and supported. Ask yourself: how do I react when I assume this world view of being rejected and neglected? How does my reaction create this reality?
Every person in this world is busy with their own life, so no one will have time to show interest in you. People doesn't reject you they are just busy.
I have always felt, and my experience has been, that with few exceptions, humans are mostly VERY cold and selfish. The human realm is very difficult to navigate. It is so hard to know how to put yourself out there, and who to trust. Vanity, social climbing and cattiness are everywhere. After over 50 years of generosity and open hardheartedness, I am learning to be much more careful when putting myself out there. Trust takes time to develop, and can never be assumed. Be patient, be careful. Hold back and observe, and you will see who is worth your precious time, your precious love.
Because the attention you provide isn't reciprocated by people. Generally we expect that if you helping someone in their need, they will also help you in your need. It's the expectation we all have. But when such event not take place and it remains one-sided only, then it feels rejected and neglected by others.
To avoid it, accept the fact that you can't control other's thoughts and actions but you can guide yours. So, try to do what seems best to you!
Anonymous
April 10th, 2020 4:15pm
you are feeling it because you don't have much friends in your life and you want someone to be with you. and not many people know you better because you may be a introvert. the thing is people will only come to you if you have something to offer, if they don't see you profitable no matter how good person you are they won't care, maybe in rare cases you will find someone who will appreciate you personality for who you are, but most cases you should be good at something. if you are a student better to work on studies and get good grades and it will get you a stable life, you could join some sport to make new friends or a gym, but thing is to work or something and it will attract people in your life. so if you only go after people they wont stay, go after something you like doing and people will follow you, goodluck.
I think you are looking too much at outsiders for a barometer on how you are feeling. If your focus is on making yourself happy and responsible for your happiness you won't feel neglected or rejected.
Anonymous
November 20th, 2016 9:29am
This is probably a fear that comes from our deepest scars from childhood. We tend to have a terrible fear on being alone and not wanted. We need to mend those deep feelings, and then sharing with people will be so much easier.
Anonymous
September 25th, 2016 11:57pm
self belief or self worth could be low speak to someone or get advice from councellors or therapists or even family members
Anonymous
June 24th, 2016 2:16am
You don't pay enough attention to what people say to you, but people are usually busy with their lives and that's totally okay, try to find some new friends that would not ignore you in any type of way, i hope i helped :)
Anonymous
May 15th, 2016 9:20am
People have issues of their own, sometimes it is not purposely because they maybe unaware of it themselves.
It may be just self doubt, which is totally normal. It's hard to accept love from others when you feel like you don't deserve it.
You may feel this way because of how other people treat others in comparison to you it's important to understand that before someone gets to know you you may feel neglected or rejected
Have you looked in the mirror lately to see how beautiful you are? Maybe you can start by not neglecting or rejecting yourself first? Have you ever practiced self love?
Anonymous
May 15th, 2016 6:37pm
I don't know, but you shouldn't feel sad or bad because of them! Im sure that at least some people don't reject you :)
Anonymous
June 3rd, 2016 2:47pm
ist be sure that you are being rejected and neglected by people or you need extra attention secondly learn to be comfortable with you it is not about outside it is inside matter see inside how you can love to yourself and then take care of people learn to control your mind set goals try achieve them learn everyday what makes you a useful person if you are useful to people either emotionally ,financially ,psychologically, professionally ,physically or other ways you will be welcome life is an art as well as science we need to learn and understand
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