I was referred to 7cups by a crisis line

It is good that you have come to the website. Listeners are here to talk through anything with you, whenever you have something on your mind and you are now amongst a community of people who understand you fully. :)

@coolvibes when I started here I was an wreck. My Anxiety was overwhelming and my sense of self was incredibly diminished. I had been in this spot for years. I was familiar with it even though, I didn’t have a clear understanding of what was going on. 7 cups helped me feel like I had safe place to be and talk openly without the fear of judgement or rejection. It was the only place I felt safe. I was so grateful for the crisis line referring me to 7 cups. I wasn’t really suicidal or having thoughts of hurting myself after a while, but I struggled tremendously with staying present. When I became overwhelmed with the expectations going on around me my mind panicked and shut down for a while. I seemed to be experiencing things I had no explanation for. I spent soo many years out of control. Suicidal, angry, unable to track conversations without trancing. Sleep was chaotic. Going through multiple night of not sleeping and waking up several times in the night. Constantly feeling on edge and agitated. Having racing thoughts and frequent nightmares. Going through urges to self-harm and over use of medication. Struggling with age regression. Struggling to drive without trancing. This was the first many years with mental health struggles. Then a few months before my parents and grandparents died. The dissociation got so much worse. Even though I wasn’t suicidal, I had unexplained body sensations and could no longer focus on an computer screen without trancing and losing track of time. Headaches where very common. Tunnel vision was chronic. I had light sensitivity and sound sensitivity. I get so uncomfortable in my own skin that I couldn’t sit still and would at times end up just pacing. After awhile I couldn’t  track the age regression and it would just happen and time would become just about lost. Either seeming to go on forever and everything moving around me at a slow pace, or everything would speed up and Move around me at a rapid pace. My voice sometimes sounded different and like it was dragging in slow motion, but when I asked if I sounded slow or drunk the response I got back was no I sounded regressed or very young. I was mentally all over the place. A few years after my parents and grandparents passing. All my symptoms began to slow down and dissipate, it was during this time that I left 7 cups and finally after like almost twenty years it all stopped. Twenty years of hospitals and therapy and confusion tapered of and came to and end. What I went through to get to that point I still have a hard time comprehending totally. I still have minor symptoms compared to being riddled with them. I take medication and make sure I get sleep every night to stay away from mood swings and keep my stress level low for the most part. I am doing pretty well though from where I have been. Their are some things that went on during this period that I won’t talk about in this forum, but They are the things I can’t make sense of, just accept that they existed. I so grateful everyday that I am mostly free of all the chaos and confusion. That I have my sense of self back. I hope 🤞 some one can read this and see that unstable feeling, and shame that comes along with it does end or at least becomes so much more manageable. Wishing everyone facing challenges all the best on their journey to healing. See ya around the community.