if I told you my story ,you would not beleive me so here is just a little
I was sexually assaulted ay 16 years old by three men ,and as a lotof peopleI blamed my self for many years,not being able to tell any one is the worse feelings ,I hid the whole thing even to the pointoftelling lies about how i got cut so bad to the hospital ,nowI worry that maybeI should have reported it because i think what if they had done it to someone else after me ,wouldI be to blame. I know how it feels and I now how to cope ,I hope I can help
You would be surprised at how many people would understand what you are going through or have been through rape amongst men is just as bad as rape against women the only difference is men have an extremely harder time talking about, that's why you don't hear about as much as you do women. Well I am 32 a guy and was aexually abused by my mom for 14 years, don't worry about how others may or may not react on this site that is not important was is, is if you need to talk to some one or if some one just needs to talk.
@quitenight Thank you for sharing your story with us. It takes a lot of courage, especially when it is something that is not often talked about. Please continue to share with us as you feel necessary. You words are comforting to me, as I can understand what you've gone through. Please know that we are here for you and I am so sorry what happened to you. I truly am. Kind Regards, FaithfulPerson
It's never too late to speak out. What you experienced was terrible and I am sorry you had to experience humanity at its worse. And I makes my heart heavy that you were afraid to open up and I wish the world wouldn't shame victims or make them feel they were to blame. At 16 your brain and heart made a choice and it was to protect yourself. You felt vulnerable and scared--so you made a choice that would help you cope at the moment. You chose to protect yourself. Now you are evolving as a person and you have learned new ways to cope. You can use what you've learned to help other people that have experienced these things. You can be a voice now. Tell your story and help others feel less vulnerable and scared.
That is exactly right
quietnight ,i know how hard it can be for a man who's has been raped ,I have a friend whoI try and help he still has bad dreams over 40 years on and is still trying to get the police to believe him its just been a struggle for him ,i think / hope i help him .we help each other
That's what's great about this site it offers a chance to meat others going through the same stuff and that is not easy to find
Thank you so much @animalSong47 for having the bravery to share some of your story with us. We are here for you.
I cant even remember my rape. I know I was raped but I don't remember anything from that day or the days following. You're not to blame for not reporting it. It was your brain's way of going into damage control. Sometimes we internalize our pain as a coping mechanism.
I really feel for men too, because there is almost a "stigma" around male rape. Especially when perpertratedby a female.
We can all heal.
Thank you for saying that we can all heal.
It should be our mantra. No blame. No self hate. Simply the belief that we can all heal from the damage.
@helpfulChestnut3866 Thank you for sharing your story with us. I understand what it is like to not remember what happend but knowing that something did. It took me many years to put the pieces together and start remembering. I repressed those memories for so long. They were too painful and it was my way of coping with the trauma. I went for years without realizing anything had happened and then all of a sudden, I would have a flashback and be able to put another piece into the puzzle. Things are much more clear now and I have had a lot of help processing my emotions and the memories. My hope is for you to continue on this sometimes extremely difficult and sometimes tiring journey. Please know that we are here for you and I look forward to continuing our journeys together. Much love, FaithfulPerson
@animalsong47 i am glad you came and shared your story with us and i understand your actions totally
it's not easy to talk about even as I get older, but it helps to know their are people who will listen and are here for me and others like me , they say its good to talk and I think that's true my bad dreams are getting less at last and things that was hidden to me are coming back slowly ,they might not be good but at least nowI am dealing with my past and I knowI can come here for help at anytime.
And hope I can help others that are going through the same thing as me .
How have the nightmares been, animalSong?
Hello. I was sexually assaulted when I was 14. I'm 39 right now. He was someone from school I knew. He was 16 at the time. I had some people over one weekend. We were outside. I never reported it at the time. It was very taboo then. It wasn't something you talked about. Alot of times it would come up, I'd do my best to push it below the surface. I had been in counseling after dealing with infertility and 2 miscarriages. I ended up blurting it out. It's been a struggle on and off. I notice times in feel more stressed out that's when it comes up. I've found meditation and yoga helpful. I have some grounding techniques that help as well. I just felt the need to share.
Thank you for being strong and sharing your story. You are brave and you are on the road to healing. I hope those who are in similar circumstances can red your story and gain strength and know they can heal.
Thanks for sharing @redlotus ! I am so glad that you are here! I know that I am not alone! Glad to hear about those positive coping skills! I find yoga and meditation to be helpful as well! :D
how are you doing lately, redlotus?
I try so hard to put this rape behind me but every time I see the scar it come rushing back it very hard to over comerape but when you have to face the scars on you body that is another story ,Its a daily reminder of things your trying so hard to get over
Perhaps covering the scar up would help. Making it beautiful with a tattoo. Choosing something that you will see everyday and find beauty in. A symbol of hope and of moving forward.
maybe you could look at it this way animalSong... you are healing inside as well as the outside. Both are a process and take time. Take good care of your body and your spirit and both will heal. So glad you are here with us!
Having a scar means that your wound is healed, I know that the wound in your heart still open... Dont know if sharring my story will help You and I know its totally diferent from yours, but I was a self harmer, and I have thousands of scars, and looking at them makes me kind of sad, cause It makes me remember things I went through, But By not seeing any open wound makes me remind that time heals everything!!!
Keep fighting, never give up, You're not worthless!!!
@Dreamer95 Welcome and thank you for sharing your story! Self harm is a difficult coping mechanism to escape. It sounds like you have a lot of hope for your own healing and for others as well.
*Sending healing thoughts your way*
Do you have any positive coping skills you use, @Dreamer95 ?