Ptsd nightmares

I can't sleep at night because my nightmares are so bad. I've tried being more open about it, talking to people, I've tried shutting down any thoughts about them, nothing helps.

When they first started, it was horrible. It started years after my trauma. I'd get them 4-5 times a night, for weeks at a time. Then they stopped for a few months and came back with no trigger, no warning, every night, months at a time.

My boyfriend (now ex) triggered me in December and they haven't stopped. He woke me up to sex, the night after I asked him not to do that exact action while I slept because of my ptsd. It destroyed my trust in him.

In the nightmares, I watch people I care about die. Every single night. Over and over. I have to fight the urge not to call my mom at 3am when I wake up after watching her and my family die, even though they're okay. It is so mentally exhausting, watching them die in a hundred different ways. I wake up crying more often than not. I have no idea how to handle it anymore. It's been going on for 3 years, I'm 19 now.