My story
Hello,
I'm V, that's why I like to be called. It's just a letter because it's not that important, like me. I'm 17. I've had a variety of horrific events happen, I don't want to go into too much detail because it brings up too many bad memories. The big one though, is the time when cops came to my house, in full force (a SWAT team - SWAT is special weapons and tactics - heavily armed officers). They grabbed me out on the street, threw me to the ground, had shotguns, assault rifles pointed at me, fingers on the triggers, no safety, and they executed 3 warrants in sync against me, my family's house. I've never done anything illegal in my life, yet they almost killed me. They almost broke my bones, they embarrassed me in-front everyone I knew, and they ruined my life. I don't want to detail why they executed warrants, and why me - because, till this day - I still don't know. I was always happy before, now I've been diagnosed with PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), Anxiety, and Depression. It's a hard combo to deal with, PTSD sucks. I have bad dreams, nightmares of similar things, and even the event. I walk into a room and I can hear a noise, or something, and it'll set me off, and I'll be paused, frozen in mid space, nothing can wake me up. I relive the events. When I'm done reliving the events, I usually burst in tears and cry for hours. It doesn't help that I have bad anxiety and depression.
Sometimes I just want to cry forever. That's my story. I've been suffering in general for 3 years, going on 4 in a few weeks. It feels like nothing will ever fix me. I see myself as a loner and a loser because I can't communicate with people properly, and cannot connect with people. I've been bullied since I was 5 years old. I accepted their mean comments, and all the bruises I got, but they never stopped hurting me.