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Family Wound-can’t sleep

humorousCup9733 October 6th, 2022
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growing up, my family life wasn’t ideal. It could have been a lot worse, but it definitely could have been better too. This has left me with this huge family wound where I would give anything to have a loving family to call my own (instead of a parent who is on their third marriage). I’m a grown adult but still have a lot of anger about the fact that I don’t have a mother or father figure in my life. This wound has been reopened because of attending a friend’s wedding (she has a solid family), being reminded of my younger siblings death (they died when I was 8), and needing to plan a trip home (I live in a different state than my family) for the holidays.


I’ve been trying to fall asleep for almost two hours with no luck because my brain keeps looping through anger and wanting a the kind of family I feel like I can never have because of being diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder a little over a year ago. Even with counseling, I just don’t know how to get this wound to heal…

6
innateJoy9602 October 6th, 2022
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@humorousCup9733

Hello,

Completely understandable that you feel upset about not having a parental figure in your life. I also hear you on longing for a family. As family is a very prominent aspect of life. However, your diagnosis doesn't mean you can't have that. <3 I hope you are able to recognize that and heal💛💫

humorousCup9733 OP October 7th, 2022
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@innateJoy9602

thank you! 😊

Jaeteuk October 7th, 2022
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Have you heard of Psychodynamic Therapy? I attended a closed group therapy about 10 years ago. Hosted by a Psychiatrist with 2 assistants, with about 10 of us. All different ages and family history. Basically, they dig deep into your wound, and then find ways to accept and guide you out of the hurt. I remember one lady had a very toxic relationship with her mother, and another gentleman who was raised by a single mother, but she had been sick (at the time of the therapy sessions). In the group, a lot of the members had anger from their childhood traumas, either from their parental figures, or other caregivers. At the end of our 3 month session, I'd say, about half of us found peace and was able to improve our lives.

Aside from not having a supportive parental figure growing up, and in the present (all that anger). How are you feeling in your current status?~

@humorousCup9733

humorousCup9733 OP October 8th, 2022
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@Jaeteuk

I have not heard of that kind of therapy. Thank you for sharing! It is interesting that you bring up group therapy because I have been trying to find a group therapy setting that would work for me. I should talk with my counselor about this the next time that I see her.

In my current status, I am a little nervous/unsure. But, this has more to do with a mental health diagnosis I was given about a year ago than with family stuff. I have Bipolar Disorder and recently had a small manic episode so some fears connected to this diagnosis have been coming up. Thank you for asking!


sensitiveShade6177 October 8th, 2022
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@humorousCup9733 I understand everything about you. I think having a good family life is the dream of everyone, and you deserve it, so it is not terrible to get sick. I hope you can actively treat it. I believe everything will become more and more better and better.

humorousCup9733 OP October 8th, 2022
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@sensitiveShade6177

Thank you!