im i just feeling sorry for myself?
I suffer badly due to my past especially my childhood. But because i don't really know what normal life is am i just dwelling on the past? Just an insight into mylife My mum hated me from the minute i drew breath. She was abusive in every single way right up to adulthood. I was mentally abused every single day. I was r*ped when i was 6/7 by a stranger whilst playing in fields then battered by her for getting dirty ffs. My parents separated when i was 7 she continued her torrent of abuse towards me. This then involved her new partner aswell. When i was 13 her second husband tried to kill us. She was badly battered till i intervened and hit him stunning him a little. I got to the house phone to phone emergency number for him to come round ripped the phone from me strangled me unconscious. Dont know how long i was out but i managed to jumped out the window and phone from a callbox. It was like a murder scene when we returned home.......i risked my life to save my mum and then after i had even more abuse from her blaming me for it all. So was my fault my own dad left and now my fault my stepdad did that. As far back as i remember i have wanted to die....my life was un bareable I felt worthless. I then yet again suffered been sexually abuse whe i was 17 by my boyfriends dad. All the above is just a small amount of my life but effects me still each and everyday. Im in my 40s and still live in a dark place in my head. Should i off got over it all by now?