My trauma? Idk
Hi everyone
I don't feel safe enough to share the whole story in here and I don't know when will that happen. I'm scared and worried.. I'm sorry
If I'm too bad or rude or anything with you I apologize.. I know that everyone hates me..
IM A FCKING HORRIBLE PERSON THAT MAKES PEOPLE FEEL SAD
EVERYONE YOU SHOULD BETTER BLOCK ME BECAUSE I DESERVE THAT
IM DESTROYING EVERYTHING AND ITS ALWAYS MY FAULT
PUNISH ME PUNISH ME FOR WHAT IM DOING
@sensitiveShade5337
Hey Shade, you know when you get overwhelmed with these thoughts, have you tried reading back in your diary to other responses? I wonder if it may remind you of the other side of these thoughts. After all, none of us are all one thing or the other. I just worry that you sound overwhelmed and yet sometimes there's no one here to respond to you on the diary thread. Maybe it's trying to find ways to cope with these thoughts, and it may be that other responses on here can remind you to be a bit kinder to yourself.
@sensitiveShade5337
hey you have and some straints
You may and weaknesess turn to straights...learn somt from it 
!
😭😭😭😭😭 I messed up 😭😭😭😭😭 now everything is lost.. they will never forgive me
@sensitiveShade5337 is your name really shade? :O if so that's really cool
@considerateLunch6484
No my real name is not shade but they do call me Shade here
Nobody wants me here.. I'm so useless and I always hurt people. I will do what I'm thinking.. it might not be the best thing to decide but it's only for the better..
My heart hurts so do I.. You are free to tell me that you hate me I already know it.. Go ahead
@sensitiveShade5337
MY HEART IS ALWAYS ON TENTION
sorry for my gramatical mistakes by the way
IM SO SCARED AND ANGRY
I JUST CANT THIS WHOLE STUFF MAKE ME SO TIRED
I WISH NOTHING HAD HAPPENED
EVERYONE BLAMES ME
AND THEY ARE RIGHT IT MY FAULT FOR EVERYTHING
@sensitiveShade5337
Weel ppl can be rude,,,and weel we all make mistakes...I made myself horibel so....embaresed.....
@sensitiveShade5337
It's neither bad nor rude to refrain from sharing, you need to go at your own pace and share as you feel comfortable. We're here to support you through your journey and help you begin walking the path to recovery. We'll be with you every step of the way, you can always reach out here for help and share when you're ready.
YOU ALL FREAKING HATE ME I KNOW IT ALREADY. STOP LYING TO ME.. YOU DONT LIKE ME AT ALL ANS TOI ALWAYS PRETEND. IM SO HURT AND ANGRY YOU ALL DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT ME. YOU JUST WANT TO HURT ME... SAY THE TRUTH
@sensitiveShade5337
I'm sorry you feel this way, Shade. If it was anything one of us said that makes you think such, please let us know so we can avoid the same mistake in the future. A lot's going on; if you want to talk to me, you can always respond to this post when you're ready. No pressure, none.
@sensitiveShade5337
Hey. People dont think. Not really. They dont take variabes in consideration. they dont even see that. If theyve been through nothing where they had to truely self reflect, they simply dont know better. stop trying to find a reason why, its just the way it is.
Rape is a horrible thing, and still everyones joking around with it, even making jokes out of it on purpose. But they know its a terrble not okay thing? but they dont actually realise/get it, becuase they dont know how it feels and all the secondary effects we never talk about. And people behave like this with pretty much everything. Add the fact that people also are stupid sheep who follow each other, and there you go idiotic mass destrution in every way.
I'm just new to this community and I'd really like to talk to you. see if we get eachother? I don't hate you. Can't say I like you either... yet... but maybe we can give it a go? I can't promise I'll give you exactly what you need, but I'm always honest, and I'm interested in your story because we might have a lot in common and can listen to eachother. skiping all the bs. I just actually dont know how to start a private convo with you... :/
So, what do you say?
@Fruityherb
well you can go to my diary section and start your own diary thing and share your story there. Also every Wednesday there's a trauma open chat on Trauma support room you will mostly find me there. To add up, you are a member which means we can't talk on 1-1 and I'm only sharing my story on 1-1s. Tho you can take part on trauma daily check ins. Stay strong!
@sensitiveShade5337
Hey again. Thanks for your reply. I'd really like to talk 1-1, I havent told anyone my story in detail so Im for sure way too afraid to post it on some public forum.... I just really want to talk to someone who gets it 1-1 and see if we can open up.... cuz im a completely fucking chaotic circus rn... and im an 18 year old girl like you so were at the same stage of life... which i find plays a huge role too...
only issue is that i have no clue how to start a 1-1 convo ._.
@Fruityherb
if you are from app you can click on 'connect now' button or click on anyone's name and message them. If you are from browser you can do the same but its much easier
@sensitiveShade5337
I CARE
I'm very compasionat and none so jugemental person... I don't care what you done if you have at least a bit heart. I care about every being!
Whats up Shade? Im here for you! Message me anytime!
@Mysterious17
i don't know you
@sensitiveShade5337 None of us are strangers here.
@Mysterious17
i don't trust you tho cause you are not familiar to me.. meaning that I don't see you on the trauma fam a lot
@sensitiveShade5337
We all began as strangers; trust takes time to build, but I hope we can all build it with each other.
I feel as if rest of my life will just be worried , I'm 16 no matter what I do no matter how hard I try it's just "it'll get better"I'm tired!
I'm so anxious and scared.. I have been thinking of suicide lately :( I know I was feeling good earlier but I'm just so anxious now. All those mistakes are killing me..
@sensitiveShade5337 hey, we are here to help you! Don't hesitate to contact me if you need to talk to someone. Loads of love from Spain ❤
