I said sorry

Abuse when young. Long time ago. Cant remember much, just bits and pieces. Flashbacks, anxiety attacks, all that fun stuff.

I remember that I said I was sorry. I really was. I didnt mean it, whatever it was that I did to make her so upset that time. I said I was sorry I told her I was but she wouldnt believe me. And then… Really remember what happened but I know that it happened, whatever it is. It Happened so fast and so slow at the same time. It was brutal I think. Who knows, I cant Remember well. Maybe wasnt even that big of a deal. Yeah Right.

All I know is that it wasnt a good situation. I tried… I really tried, I tried my best but it didnt work… I couldnt stop it and once she got started… Not good. I thought saying sorry would help keep me safe. Sometimes it worked but I guess it didnt work that time. Scary. Sorry. Cant remember, just the feelings come back. Sorry. Scared.