Cptsd journal

@Mashedpotato364

I am sorry you are feeling that. But also glad that they said something, as it is better that you know rather than for you to think they are a great person for you to talk to about your trauma.

I guess the first thing you need to do is find others to talk to? Do you have a good counsellor or therapist? And someone here maybe?

Next I guess how do you stay connected with your friend in other ways. I know that can be hard when our trauma is taking up all of our own thoughts. What sorts of things do they like to talk about or share with you? Could you play games or go on outings/walks or something? 💛

Not the only person in your life. I'm here too and I could use someone other than the one person I have too. They haven't been through it like I have, they don't know on a personal level what it is like to live with it. So feel free to reach out. You just might be hrlping me more than you are trying to help yourself.

@Mashedpotato364 Hi there,

It’s interesting enough on how many parallels there are between the situation you had just described & what I have currently been battling with. It’s rough knowing that this could feel like the only person you thought could truly get you outside of how/what you feel & know about yourself personally which makes it tricky because you’d consider them reliable & trustworthy to the extent of what they’ve shown you but only because of how they showed up. Only to find out that all of a sudden, they can’t & won’t be able to show up in the same way which shatters us because we thought it would come to bring us the balance that we need to get back up on our feet yet.. now what, right? As I write this out now, I want to thank you for sharing because it’s helping me to understand & get through certain grievances that come on this particular matter. Where we ideally would love for someone to show up & display their love for us, they can disappoint by the lack thereof. The only thing that keeps me going is my relationship with God in how He shows up even when it seems least likely to happen in that we can keep crying, complaining and/or hurting about how disappointed we are about the outcome of things & in how much we were let down by them in expectation not knowing that He’s the one to come & show up instead. I say this not to push Him on you but to encourage you to try Him & give Him that chance to show you so that He can indeed heal your broken heart & bind up your wounds. It’s the only way I was able to rise up again to write this reply back to you. I’m not one to really like to talk or share so much but feeling led on how this spoke to my heart, I felt the need to share just for a bit & uncover my testimony of how He’s actively helping me to make it out of this rut. I realize very well that this is an old post from years ago but I pray that you’re able to come across this by the grace & tender mercies of God & that it may inspire & encourage you to draw yourself to Him. It really doesn’t take much to get His attention if you decide to try & speak to Him but because of you choosing to believe that He can show you that He’s not like man that He should lie. Just writing all of this out by faith has helped me see Him in this so again I say, thank you🤍

P.S.: Even if this wouldn’t be well received & accepted, I’ll respect it, move on & simply receive it as a reply/note from me to me🙌🏼