Asheroo's Journey *trigger warning for sexual abuse*
Before I started typing, I was tapping on my latop and staring around my room, unsure of what to write. The first time I talked about my abuse was several years ago on twitter to my best friend. Since then, I have told a total of 5 people, one of them was in person. Finally talking in person about the abuse I went through as a child was overwhelming. It was a safe space; I talked to a helpline on the phone and when I got referred to a counsellor, I told them. It was a lot easier because they already had my details. They didn't raise the topic and they made it clear we would only discuss it if/when I was comfortable with it. At the moment, I'm not at all comfortable. It brought back memories and on Saturday morning, I relapsed with self-harm. I'm trying to keep things calm and make sure that I am around people and getting out of the house rather than allowing myself to shut down. I know that if I do, it will take me a while to come out of.
My goal is to feel comfortable talking about the abuse with my counsellor. I think if I get to that point, I'll find it easier to deal with (I hope!)