After 20 yrs I'm still terrified of him

I was at work today finishing up cutting some blinds, nothing unusual. It was the last 20 minutes of my shift. I couldn't find my tape measure so I walk to the desk and there just a few feet away from the desk is my worst nightmare. I freeze, he spits me smiles and I walk straight to the desk, act like I don't see him and go straight back to the aisle I was. I freak out and my palms begin to shake and my breathing becomes slightly ragged. I walk deeper into my department and find my department supervisor and I let her know I CANNOT help that man. She's known me for 2 yrs and she knows something serious is up. Bc I trust her I tell her he is my rapist. She pales and says no worries I'll help him. But it's too late he wants a spanish speaker to help him. He saw me and wants me to help. She walks back pretending to look for me and she tells me to go to the break room. I can't believe that after 20 yrs he still terrifies me. I got home and just hugged my husband he asked what was wrong. I waited until after dinner to tell him. He knows my past and he can tell I'm not okay. He hugs me back. I know I'll have nightmares tonight. Ugh why?! Why did hebHAVE. To come into MY store.