Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
  1. Forum
  2. Trauma Support
  3. What kinds of abuse is this?

What kinds of abuse is this?
yellowEyes4455 May 4th, 2020
.

So I know I'm being abused at this point... I just need clarification about the kinds of abuse I'm facing. It's unclear to me, aside from the emotional abuse and the rarely physical abuse.

My parents have:

Claimed that my phone and laptop belong to them, and demand that I pay them 1000+ dollars to 'own' my stuff. They often threaten to break my stuff too if I don't comply with them (this is their default reaction, btw). And yes, they HAVE actually broken my stuff. My dad threw my laptop down the stairs once.

My dad has said to my face that he's had to restrain himself from beating me up.

My dad frequently twists my arms and such in the name of 'rough housing' and then acts like I'm being dramatic every single time I say ow. He once cancelled an outing with me because I told him off for pulling on my hair and not taking my pain seriously.

My mom has called me selfish for talking to her about having self harm fantasies. (Before anyone suggests a hotline, I'm not actively suicidal - I haven't seriously done harm to myself in years).

My mother often plays down my dad's yelling at me, trying to say that he does it because he's worried about me.

My dad just last night yelled at me, saying that I'm going to end up a failure, I'm wasting my potential, and it spurred the first panic attack I've had in a year.

My mom has slapped me before, on my arm, when I try to push her away from my computer due to the above issues I've mentioned involving that.

My mom has smacked my electronic out of my hands or lap.

Most of this I believe falls under emotional abuse, but I'm unsure about what the 'your electronics belong to me so I can do whatever and you can't stop me' thing falls under.

Thoughts?

3
Yukihiko May 7th, 2020
.

@yellowEyes4455

I'm sorry thst you had to go through all of that. It must be a rough experience.

From what you described, I think that the electronic part is also a form of emotional abuse. By guilt tripping you to pay your own electronics and dismissing your feelings as if it's "dramatic" for you to express it.

I do hope that things will be better for you now and in the future.

RealPersonNow January 18th, 2021
.

I am really sorry about this happening to you. In my modest opinion it could be that they trying and struggling for keeping the control and power over you. Your laptop is your window to an outside world they can't control anymore. They are not so sure what you do with you Laptop. So they trying to attract your attention with making every kind of drama over your electronics even by telling you that you are not the owner. They are getting older and you are not a baby anymore so you can't obey or agree everything they say so they manipulate what is the most important thing to you: Your laptop, your internet connection to the outside world. They got older and they are loosing control over your thoughts. So they are freaking out on worse possible way. I really hope they charge their behavior very soon

Summershy March 23rd, 2021
.

@yellowEyes4455

It sounds like a combination of

1. Narcissistic abuse - You owe them and everything is about them. They are also trying get narcisstic supply from you by saying that those things you have belong to them

2. Name calling is mental abuse

3. Verbal abuse is swearing

4. Mental abuse - gaslighting

5. Mental abuse- telling you will never amount to anything

*Support Forum Disclaimer
My communities
Community guidelines
Report an issue
Talk to an expert therapist
As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I maintain a strong interest...
Talk to Tracy-Kate Now