Traumatic Experiences Daily CheckIn - Tuesday 6th June 2017
Gooood morning lovely people :)
How are we all doing today? Is there anything this week that you are looking forward to?
For some reason I couldn't get this post earlier, but oh well 4th times the charm ^_^
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@Avaray @vriska44 @Shadeshack @BeeLeigh @Faeryschild @dancingRainbow45 @Lavendermoonlight @KLM3278 @sujaypai
@sweetMelody95 @jr50 @agreeableKite4304 @PhoenixPatronus @Morfo66 @themainjane @raycascotch
@KatieMoon1 @conscientiousPineapple1782 @Tamba @inventiveOrange1 @Jenna0903 @melliotm @PanamaBanana
@AutumnLeigh @DeborahUK @PuppyLove13 @KristenHR @BradyChay2310 @HearingYourHeart @vriska @TreesandWine
@guyb @chayil @Sharkradio @MKjart @AnnaKateMillerLCSW @Tamba @Celestialvoid @WaterLily16 @TheAsh @MKJart @Asiam1971 @philosophicalship9444 @Chayil @rumplesteeleskin @Survivetoalive @exuberantTriangle2562 @coraline23 @Lilyflower0817
@caterpillargirl
@PhoenixPatronus
I feel like listeners don't understand me completely. Wonder how much confident could be not to put on risk too much. I am just confused. Wish sometimes people more just listen. I don't haven enough proper support like... Started to feel like a bit insecure.
@conscientiousPineapple1782 Hey Pine, I'm sorry to hear that. What do you feel would help you feel more supportive?
@PhoenixPatronus
My listener told me that feelings are complex and be more logical but so life itself not simple. Made me think more about everything. Huge rule made in life emotions... like to go with my guts. Feel so confused...myb I'm sometimes afried to admit can't something. Make up my mind to trust myself. Idk Phonex... wish have more support in rlf. I open up to new friends online but I don't know them or trust them as friends I know for longer. I sometimes wonder do I already know what to do just to much scared... Tryed to conect with my feelings... I try to be Independent and not realay to much on others. Don't like way sociaty works. Feel to much alone. Like do I need with all on my own? Wish could trust more and could open to my friends. Internet also exosts me and not sure how to use that new invation ;).
@conscientiousPineapple1782
If you'd like to reach out to me I would love have to the chance to make you feel understood and listened to. I have a lot of experience in trauma. Just putting it out there :)
@PhoenixPatronus
I slept well last night :) I didn't wake up once. First good night's sleep in a while. No nightmare's and I drifted off rather fast. YEAH!!!
I'm looking forward to working with the teachers at the library this morning to get them ready for the summer art program.
I also feel energized with how well yesterday went with the other teachers, where it ended with good conversation, connection and pizza- an added surprise delite because normally I just do my thing and head out.
@MKJart that's great MK! I'm glad to hear you had a good night and managed peaceful sleep. And it's great everything went well yesterday, with an added bonus of pizza! Whoo! I hope everything goes smoothly today and you have a lovely day :)
@PhoenixPatronus hey Phoe :) Good to see you finally got your post done :) Hope your day is going good for you. Hows my day gone so far, well its pretty stormy here in the UK and woke up to see my mini greenhouse the other side of the garden with all the pots of tomatos, cucumbers, melon, chilli plants etc strewn across the garden!! Have managed to rescue some. Then spent time trying to finish off the radiator in my bedroom which has been having a make over, cooked dinner for later, walked the dog, done the housework, and done some paperwork. So its been pretty productive so far. How about you? 
@dancingRainbow45 Hey Rain! Yeah, I was having tablet issues initially, aha.
Oh wow o_o I'm glad you managed to save some. That sounds really productive! Go Rain!
I'm alright thanks, not the best of days, but it's not so bad either :3
@PhoenixPatronus You know where I am if you need to chat or chill :) Hope your day improves for you Phoe :) Your doing a really great job with this checkin, go you!!!!
@PhoenixPatronus
Hi Pho, love your intro... and sorry to hear its not the best day for you... but you're doing so well here! And i'm joining you now. Its dawn on a winter's morning and can see Venus in the early morning sky... amazing.
@dancingRainbow45
Wow. Yeah, that's a productive day - I mean, so far. (:
So sorry about the greenhouse. Glad for those that were able to be saved and hope they make a full recovery. Must've been quite a storm. Is the greenhouse salvageable?
I gardened once and I know I'd feel sick if I saw all my babies strewn across the lawn. So in all seriousness, kudos to you for making it such a productive day in spite of this.
@PhoenixPatronus
I'm emotionally exhausted and feeling a bit lonesome. But other than that, okay! lol...
I am looking forward to tonight watching tv with my kitty. So long from now!
@celestialvoid
Sounds so cosy to be watching tv with your kitty... think our pets are a great comfort. Try to take it easy today.
@PhoenixPatronus. I am looking forward to living in a place with 3 bedrooms and 2 baths and being free!
@jr50
Glad to hear you are looking forward to this. .a place with 3 bedrooms and 2 baths sounds greatt.. And to be free! Hope your day is going okay.
@rozie. Thanks I am ok.
@jr50 Hey jr :) ohh, that place sounds amazing! Really happy for you! Freedom is important! ^_^
@PhoenixPatronus
Thank you Pho for your encouragement... feeling a little new and green..great to be your partner and looking forward to sharing this time here. Take care.
Had therapy today - the kind where it's good but also some truth telling - facing reality - and so it was hard in that way. Meh. It sucks that I have to do this, but it's my journey so I'm gonna have to figure it out - or sink. I can't keep treading water - I'm getting tired.
I am not really looking forward to one thing in particular - it's really just one day at a time at this point.
I am facing the reality that I am not well - struggling to keep up my weight, don't know if I really care. Some days I do, see things more clearly and panic because I can see what's happening. It's a cycle. I expect to end up collapsed and in the hospital, TBH - I don't know how to break free.
I have to go back to the doctor at the end of the week to discuss my meds - def NOT looking forward to that, but interested to see if the meds releive my anxiety about going there in the first place. Usually I want to hide under the chair and shake so much I can't think or talk clearly. That's always fun. :/
wow, that was so negative - meh! Sorry...
@KatieMoon1
Its okay to say how it is for you Katie.. and can understand how tough a rherapy session like that can be.. phew! Just know we're here in support... we all need each other... and holding on to the hope with you that one step at a time there is a way through. <3
@KatieMoon1 Never apologize nor feel guilty for being honest. I'm eternally grateful that these fora exist for us to let it all out without having to feel the need to hold back or put a varnish on the awful truth. No need to paint a sunny facade, nor disapproval because of how you feel. Support should unconditional because we've all been there, are there, or will be there again ourselves -- wherever or whatever our particular 'there' is or happens to be. 💟