need to forget my ex and start to love my husband
This post is kind of long. sorry about that.
I had a bf in 2022 I loved him so much. It's like I felt love day by day increasing. our affair only had 1 yr. but at the end of 2022 his parents disagree to the affair and he stopped. But it was very hard me to stop
feelings toward him. after few months like 1 or 2 he found a new girlfriend. I didn't know about that even though we stopped affair I chat with him. (actually it's like I begged for him that I need him) later he said he has a new gf. but I didn't stop chat with him. time to time I sent messages. he also sent msg to me. in 2023 june I met a man kind hearted. He started to love me. but in my mind I had feelings for my ex. last month I married to that person. he is so good. very kind. I love him than my ex. but when we start to be romantic I still remember my romantic moments with my ex. that make me so stress. I want to forget my ex and live my husband. but my heart don't allow me. so I'm suffer because of that. my husband loves me more than ex loved me. but now my feeling which I had toward ex is stronger than feelings I have toward my husband. please help me to forget ex and love my husband
@lavenderZebra7651
I can only imagine how bad and maybe guilty you feel having these strong emotions for another person knowing your husband loves you, is good to you and you love him too. It must be a struggle being with your husband whilst your ex is on your mind. It might help to talk to someone like a listener here about what kind of feelings you have and explore why they all over sudden arise. Do you feel that you miss certain things your ex gave you (emotionally) which you crave for now and that makes it hard to let go of him and close that "chapter"?
actually I'm the one who love to my ex. that means he didn't has strong feelings toward me. I don't know why I still have feelings for him. he don't know how caring should be given. actually my husband is the one who truly love me
actually my husband is the one who love me really. but I have feelings for ex. maybe because we have very romantic moment. now romantic moments are less with my husband than ex
@lavenderZebra7651
Some people plan regular date nights to spark their romance again and do new things together that bring you joy.
you said that now you have less romantic moments with your husband. It’s because your husband don’t want to explore this part more than you want or it’s because of you and your feelings about your ex?
One more thing, do you still have things like pictures, gifts, messages or anything else from your ex?
Do you still have him on social media as a friend?
I’ve been through the things you’re going now and my advice is to get rid of anything that reminds you about your ex.
When the feelings are coming just from one partner while he knows that the other doesn’t have the same feelings for him, that’s not love, it’s obsession.
I think you gonne really too fast in this marriage with yout husband, you did that because you couldn’t cope with loneliness and the feelings you that you have for your ex. You thought that this marriage will solve your problem but it didn’t.
If you want to make this marriage working, just try to get rid of anything that reminds you about your ex, ANYTHING, and after that try to make new beautiful memories with your husband. If loves you like you said, he should be enough open minded to learn and the romantic part you’re missing. You should have a nicely discussion about this important part of your relation, the romantic one.
You should go with him in holiday for one week or more in the mountains or at the sea, just you two. And if even after those things you will keep having this kind of problem, maybe you’ll have to get some therapy from a professional therapist which will help you to go through those problems.
You should love yourself more that anyone, and after you will be capable to love yourself, I could say that in moment you’ll 100% capable to love others.
