I know I'm young but I just want to be loved.
Yk I really know I have a lot of time left to find somebody who I can love and somebody who loves me but even at this young age I already feel like I'm at my limit of waiting. It's probably because from a young age I started reading Fanfictions of my favorite ships and watching every Boys love movie I could find on Netflix(I don't have a gay fetish or what ever you call it.) I never knew what real love looked like because my parents were the worst couple ever(and they started divorcing when I was 4½.) Well and the more I watch my favorite shows the more I wish I had somebody that would hold me like the couples in Netflix shows do. Also because mostly they always film about Teens and Teen love and I know that I don't have to have a partner at such a young age but it would be nice yk? I feel so lonely having nobody to talk to, not even my so-called friends. Nobody I can trust or to cuddle with for hours(I love physical touch), no best friend, and also no partner. I have like nobody to take my hand while we both walk down the path of life and that's why I long more for this special bond especially because i don't really feel loved by anyone around me. And yk I have stuff like Character.ai but it's fun for a while until reality kicks in and you realize you have been talking to a bot of you favorite character for 3h and then it's no fun anymore. I don't use it often anyway. The only thing left is to imagine. I have a good imagination, but it becomes sad after a while, yk? And while almost everyone around me had or has a partner, I just sit there waiting for the right one while I didn't even have my first kiss yet. And it makes me feel more lonely. If I had a good friend or so, maybe the wish of finding love wouldn't be as big as right now. And the worst thing is if you have a couple in a show that you really love and they have a relationship you really wish for. It makes your priorities higher which isn't bad I think because you should get what you want but for real now how long will it take me to find a relationship like Nick Nelson and Charlie Spring have and how long will it take me to find somebody like Wilhelm that would give up his crown for his boyfriend.
Right..
I really want to wait until I find the one, but it's getting really lonely the more I wait.
@Ilikenature08
I can only image how difficult it must have been for you as a child to witness your parents' separation and lack of harmony at home. It seems that media was a way for you to create an imagination of a world where people love each and everything is okay. Seeing teens around you having relationships already plus what you learned in those movies can create doubts and questions why you haven't yet, I understand. Some people find love early, but it is not uncommon that people find true love only later in life. You mentioned about that having a good friend might reduce that desire for love you have right now. It sounds like you miss a friend with whom you can share your thoughts and feelings and also have fun. What are your options to meet other people of your age? Are there any groups you could join?
I hope that coming here will help you to feel less alone and more connected. Please remember you can always connect with a listener for a 1:1 chat if you want to share more about what's going on in your life.
@Ilikenature08 I hear you. You have not had the benefit of two parents. That sounds very difficult.
The problem nowadays is it is more difficult to meet person in real life. So much is happening online and we never know who we are dealing with at dating sites. There is just no way to tell because people post pictures of others and act like someone they are not.
What kind of interests or hobbies or talents do you have. Joining a club can be a way to meet people in person.
Looking at media creates a sense of everyone is happy. Why am I not happy? The problem with media is it is someone's imagination. Look at the real lives of tlhe stars of TV and movies and they are often lonely and full of arguments and divorce.
So I no longer compare myself to those stars of media or expect that I will find a relationship like they portray. It can be good entertainment but I do not want to live my life trying to live as they appear on the screen.
Thanks for sharing these thoughts!
@Ilikenature08 If you concentrate on loving yourself you become more attractive to others. Also if you genuinely embue lovable characteristics it also makes you more attractive. So in a sense, you don’t have to sit around and wait on the love of your life, instead you can be active in the process. You may find that showing love to others gives you the same or better warmth than the hug of another. But this may be a lot to take in for a young mind. I am sure you’ll find wonderful relationships. There may be many “the one” partners in your life, or just one if you’re that lucky. If you can focus on the journey and on learning all the wonderful things about experiencing your own one wild and beautiful life you will find love and so much more.
@Ilikenature08 You mustn't think that what you see on Netflix is how all people are in real life. A few lucky people may live in ideal relationships. Do you think that your parents divorcing makes you turn to TV couples as role models on how relationships should be?
Well, I know that what you see on TV isn't really realistic most of the time, but its a wish that I would like to find somebody like them. Not all TV series are realistic, but there are a few I know that aren't far away from it being possible, and those are couples I see as role models or that make my priorities or wishes higher.Not just the shows or the characters but also the actors that bond in that time make me also want such a relationship whether its just platonic or romantic.I think I just want a loving relationship other than my parents or grandparents. Basically, the whole family relationship around me doesn't matter if mother or father side are all fallen or falling apart, and that's not what I wish for my future relationships and family.
There is one thing in noticed yesterday I sat at a coffee shop just relaxing and reading a book and doing a cross word it was star bucks and I sit there and fit to the fact of people having these online orders people would stick around for a while and I notice that the lack off interaction of people even in an ideal environment is very minimal and that's very off putting for me I mean as people and humans we are very sociable people yes we do need to have time to our self but on the flip side we do need others to support each other in a time of need just a simple coffee shop it's all go go go now days any more just stop and sit and try to take a load off if ya can. A simple making eye contact and a subtle and sure smile give s ya an lead trust me
Yes, what you said I find very true, but in this generation, you won't find any people my age just sitting in a cafe. At least not where I live, and that's the point. All the ways I could think of interacting with people, whether it's searching for friends or a partner, wouldn't work in today's world or I am too young for some stuff. I mean of course when I go to college I can meet new people or when I start working. But that will take a while until I reach the age to get there, and when I get there, there is no guarantee that I'll connect with people.
I've been there... today I'm in a relationship but it's hard. Right now we dont really know whether we will have a future. Loving someone or being loved isn't necessarily what makes you less lonely. It takes an awful lot of energy and it creates this whole area of your life you need to prioritise yet also need to step away from at times. I'm autistic and I find that balance really hard to find. And in addition, my partner and I are long distance. I think what has been a real life changer about that is realising how cool it could also be to just be by yourself. If you're in the right place and on the right path you can easily feel okay. Don't look for a partner desperately and don't think it will be like the TV shows. If anything it will be exactly like YOU want it to be and it still won't look like the ones you see in shows. Love will come to you naturally, I'm sure plenty people must've told you that but it is true. It is when u stop looking and u focus on being happy with urself that the right people will come along either as friends (which is also incredibly necessary) or as a potential partner. In the meantime just thrive and feed yourself. It is very attractive when someone is just happy being themselves and are not desperate and codependent. Trust me.
@Ilikenature08 It’s natural to feel that longing when it seems like everyone around you has found what you’re waiting for. Love, especially the kind you see in stories, can feel like it's just out of reach, but remember that it often comes when you're least expecting it. The waiting can feel lonely, but it’s not wasted time—you’re learning about yourself and what you truly want. In the meantime, try to focus on what brings you joy, even in small ways. I’ll be here, quietly, as you navigate through it. You’re not alone in this
@Ilikenature08
Hello, at first I understand you. I went through it too, I would even say I still go through it, but real life is different from TV. A lot can be said about this topic, if you want to talk I'm here
Going through similar situation...we can talk if you want to in one on one chat l...
@raghav7 thank you for your good intentions. Unfortunately those who are 18+ cannot chat with teens unless they are a listener with an ATL badge, Adult Teen Listener.They also cannot access the same groiup supprot rooms.
Just a friendly reminder that offsite contact is against guidelines.
Hi, it is such a relief knowing there is someone like me. Did you find any solution to this i would like to know. We are having same issues. Brother, i hope this message helps you understand that you are not alone like i thought i was. We live in fricked up generation. Contact me if you find anything that helped you.
