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What am I doing wrong that I'm not happy all the time?

amiablePeace77 April 8th, 2022


Does this question sound familiar to some of you? Maybe, you have heard this question from a friend or even asked it yourself. But is there really an answer?

I am not sure. Humans are not designed to be happy all the time, it is as simple as that. However, society and the media tells us that we need to feel happy to be okay.

When you switch on your television and watch advertisements, you usually see happy people. That can make us feel like something is wrong with us when we feel down. I'm not talking about disorders like depression or anxiety, but rather about occasional feelings of sadness, anger or feeling anxious. We all have a full range of emotions and they come and go. It can be lucky if we feel more happy than sad and I hope this is the case for all of you.

To try to force feelings like happiness is frustrating and dishonest to yourself. There are no wrong inner feelings, whatever we feel, it is a valid feeling but maybe not a good guide for our next action, but rather something which needs attention. Our feelings are communicators, they want to tell us something.

How difficult is it for you to stay with feelings which cause you discomfort? For example knowing “Right now I feel sad, but I know this feeling will pass”.

What do you believe causes people to struggle? Some people struggle to deal with the actions of other people. Others suffer having to deal with the emotions that arise when we deal with others.

How would you feel if all your emotions were acknowledged and accepted, even if we do not like the results? Just being okay to know you have an emotion can make a big difference.



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soulsings April 8th, 2022

@amiablePeace77

How difficult is it for you to stay with feelings which cause you discomfort? I find it easier to stay with pleasant feelings.

What do you believe causes people to struggle? When people insist on doing things that are against what life is giving right now it is an inner battle.

How would you feel if all your emotions were acknowledged and accepted, even if we do not like the results? I would think I would not have such strong feelings about them.


1 reply
amiablePeace77 OP April 10th, 2022

@soulsings

Life is definitively much easier when we accept what is there. To me it does not mean we can't improve though but being okay with what life gives allows us to enjoy it.

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GoldenNest2727 April 10th, 2022

Wise words, amiablePeace! I prefer to be happy and upbeat, but I'm sure that all of us do. 😊

1 reply
soulsings April 10th, 2022

@GoldenNest2727 I agree happy is what we want but life is a mixed bag of experiences.

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Harmony8682 April 10th, 2022

@amiablePeace77

How difficult is it for you to stay with feelings which cause you discomfort?

I think it feels horrible to be sad or miserable and try and cheer myself up if I can even though it maybe out of my control because of mood swings.

What do you believe causes people to struggle?

I think it's like you say media and societal perceptions within your community or country where you live.

How would you feel if all your emotions were acknowledged and accepted, even if we do not like the results?

I would probably feel better because sometimes you just need to vent to someone or understand why you are feeling that way.

1 reply
soulsings April 10th, 2022

@Harmony8682 I agree that trying to white wash and say everything is great is unsettling.

What works for me is to find one small thing to be grateful for, like food and a roof over my head. A little gratitude does not wash out all the rest but I enjoy a few minutes of a vacation from focusing on the things I would like to change if only I could.

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Challenger April 10th, 2022

To me.... Possibly the focus is on things which are missing and unable to what you are blessed with... Please discuss in person if you want.

1 reply
soulsings April 10th, 2022

@Challenger I think there is a lot to say for changing the channel or focus to give another perspective.

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