Post-Traumatic Growth (PTG)
Today, I would like to share a short story of my life with you hoping it will help some of you and give you hope ❤️
There was a time in my life when I was badly bullied. I tried to be strong and resistant towards my bullies and suppressed my emotions so no one could really see how I felt. Inside though, I was deeply hurt. Feelings of fear, anger and frustration were my daily companions. This went on for many years without any break.
During this time I made mistakes also. I behaved in ways which were not like me and that only made things even worse. As a consequence I started to doubt myself greatly. All of this happened at a time I was under a lot of pressure anyhow, I often felt hopeless and unloved.
One day I felt I couldn't go on anymore carrying this burden. Something needed to change and I was able to make the change. I left the place where I was bullied most and isolated myself from the world. It took me a very long time to start healing and stop the flashbacks. They are not gone completely but they appear only rarely.
I realized that something in me was broken, so having faith or trust in others was impossible, but I also realized that I was much stronger than I thought. Working at 7cups as a volunteer, I have a lot more personal strength and I see that there are other ways I can live my life which I never saw before. What I’ve learned is a very helpful coping mechanism here on 7cups. In fact, I never felt so content in my own skin than ever before in my life.
I’ve never been diagnosed with trauma or never went to get help, something I regret very much. It could have saved me a lot of pain from what was so traumatic, but I’m proud of how I grew in the last few years, especially since joining 7cups.
I would like to recite a chapter from Psychology Today:
Post-Traumatic Growth is the positive psychological change that some individuals experience after a life crisis or traumatic event. Post-traumatic growth doesn’t deny deep distress, but rather posits that adversity can unintentionally yield changes in understanding oneself, others, and the world. Post-traumatic growth can, in fact, co-exist with post-traumatic stress disorder.
Below are some points which can help to facilitate growth after traumatic events:
It is really important to admit to yourself that what you experienced felt traumatic to you.
Accept that you’ve been knocked down first by the experience, but that you also stood up again - recognize your strength!
Forgive yourself and others. It does not mean forget what happened but instead find peace within yourself. As has often been said, forgiveness benefits the one who forgives more than the one who receives forgiveness.
Be gentle with yourself, engage in regular self-care.
Develop a different mindset about stress. If I see stress only as bad for me, every time I experience stress it will add more stress, but if I can see it as a test or a teacher I can learn from it. Accepting that I am in a stressful situation and observing it without reacting impulsively is empowering!
Reflect on your current priorities, are they set right? Is your first priority to care for your own well-being when needed, when you feel you can’t move on without a break?
Post-traumatic growth happens when you’re able to transform trauma and use adversity to your advantage. Every day mindfulness practices and activities can greatly help to slow down, be more aware of yourself and your surroundings, and generally help you to grow. Having the continuous, reliable involvement of a therapist or counselor helps aid the process of dealing with trauma but also of post traumatic growth.
Do you feel that you have been growing from whatever happened to you and if so in what way?
If you do not feel that you are not getting better would you consider getting therapy?
Are you looking for a therapist? 7cups has online, certified therapists with a paid option. For more information click on link https://www.7cups.com/online-therapy/?ob=1
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@amiablePeace77
Yes, I have grow a lot. I started eating better and exercise years ago and somehow I try to keep or improve those routines. I also worked my childhood biggest trauma with the help of a book and therapy and I really felt a big relief.
Therapy did not worked for some years, but the last two experiences were fruitful. Right now I have discovered that learning skills through courses are more efficient to me and I am winning the battle against anxiety. 😁
@mary31
Nice to hear that you are making progress in dealing with anxiety! Sometimes it needs time before one can "harvest the fruit" of therapy since our bodies also require different times to internalize what is learned.
@mary31 glad to hear this.
@mary31 Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us.
@mary31 glad to hear you are finding ways to cope with anxiety.
@amiablePeace77 Thanks for sharing this.
Very well written.
Nice job.
@Happy900
Thank you for your kind words.
@amiablePeace77 Your welcomed.
@amiablePeace77
Thank you for sharing your story. I've changed o so much over the years. I've had good, bad and terrible therapists along the way. I've learned to let the bad therapists own their own mistakes too. Made me appreciate more the ones who really did help me.
I've moved far away from where all my initial healing took place. Now, I find it a bigger burden to try and start all over with a new therapist. I don't want to go through a re-hashing of all that I've been through just to bring a new therapist up to speed. I have all the coping skills from what I've learned before from excellent therapy so I think I'm good. All I need is someone to talk to now and then. That's why I appreciate the good listeners I've had contact with here.
Sending (((hugs))) of gratitude and comfort.
@EmbStitcher33 Thanks for sharing this.
I am so glad our listeners here at 7Cups, was able to help you.
This is wonderful news.
@amiablePeace77
Thank you for helping us become part of your journey. This is a very well-written post with so many wonderful ideas on how to feel better. It is very insightful and helpful.
Forgiving yourself and others is so important and it does not mean you forget, as you have said, but it means that you move forward peacefully. Very wise!
@LisaMeighanMScMBPsS Thanks for being so very supportive and helpful to the 7Cups Online Therapy Community.
Your so amazing and very talented, my friend.
Thank you for the information !
@amiablePeace77, how is it supposed to give me hope?
@tidySailboat7966
tidySailboat7966 it can be hard to find hope when dealing with trauma but what I find gives hope it knowing that I can have an impact on the present, that I can learn ways to deal with possible trauma triggers, that there are people here to help. To me hope is given when we move on and not get stuck. Sending you warm hugs (if accepted)