Accepting Compliments (Self Esteem Challenge)
Hello everyone!
Welcome to Day 5 of our Self-Esteem Icebreakers in celebration of the 30 Day Self-Esteem Challenge across the community.
Today's theme is "Accepting Compliments".
If you were to give yourself a compliment, what would it be?
Group Support sessions happening today:
Adults: Compliment War in the Self Harm Recovery room at 10:00 AM EST. Hosted by @LuluRings & @CheeryMango
Teens: Compliment War in the Special Events room at 1:00 PM EST. Hosted by @CheeryMango
Click HERE to look out for more Self Esteem Challenge Icebreakers
Click HERE to find the Self-Esteem group support sessions schedule for the month
@CheeryMango great job
Love this prompt ❤️❤️
If I was going to give myself a compliment I would tell myself: I am important 🌟
tagging some amazing people to join us today!
@AndrewF27
@humorousScarf5051
@faithfulPeaky
@Pollyanne
@raspberrySea424
I have more empathy than I think
I am good listner when ot comes to serious talk
You are a good friend and have a great heart
My mental strength is terrifyingly strong, and I use my stubbornness to help others well.
If I had to give myself a compliment as they do make me quite uncomfortable. It would be that I’m a good mom. I try so hard, just knowing my daughter is thriving helps reinforce that I’m doing a good job. Parenting can be so scary sometimes you know?
@RavenObscure
You're doing a wonderful job and we all here on 7 Cups are so proud of you! Keep going, beautiful soul. ❤
That we can still find out which is right and which is wrong in this society of 2021. Choose wisely and enjoy. Remember, Shadow never leaves. Compliment is just another term for free. Free things won't last long. All the best!
@CheeryMango
You're a true friend with a brilliant and unpredictable mind.
@CheeryMango
This is VERY SUPER HARD!!!!!!!!!! i HATE COMPLEMENTS, IT IS VERY, VERY UPSETTING TO GET THEM AND IT BOTHERS ME TREMENDOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I do NOT want to give myself ANY COPLEMENT OR GET ANY COMPLETMENT FROM ANYONE ELSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You or anyone else, can choose to feel how you feel about this, agree or disagree, as that is all up to you and how you choose for yourself. You will not make me want this, like this, or accpet this in any way, shape, or form. If you have a problem with this, then go and deal with it. I am who I am and I do not want this one bit. I have every right to decide what I want for myself. I choose my own boundaries for myself. I choose to not allow this for myself. If you want to go and do this for others who want this, then, please respect me and what for want for myself, and go and concentrate on those that want this. Do as you want to do for who you are, but, give me my respect and honor that for what I want for myself!!!!!!!!!!!
@Amelia2324
Good on you for respecting your own boundaries, I often forget to do that, I just go along with what is expected/polite, then later wish I had been more self-aware and honest.
Sometimes I like compliments, sometimes I don't. In general I do like them, but I hate praise and believe we shouldn't use it so much.
I would love to hear more about the reasons you don't like it, and what people could do instead, as it is usually something we just do, without asking first!
@VioletSpringGlade
Hi, I hope you are doing aright today. 
Thank you for your questions and I will do my best to adequately answer what you asked. I first want to say that I do not like grouping people together for purposes of beliefs, ideas, thoughts held, behaviors,etc. But, for answering this, I will have to do a little bit of this.
I agree with you that we should not use praise so much in life. I believe that just often reinforces inapproprite beliefs, actions, behaviors, thoughts, ideas, and much more. It has gotten to a point that people do not take responsibility for their own actions, behaviors, thoughts, ideas, and such. Most people just expect and want praise and understanding for whatever it is that they do. They want this, feel this is what they are supposed to get from others, are quite upset if others do not give this, and feel wronged. This just reinforces the inappropriate things that occur and have been occurring.
For me, I am self motivated and have been my whole life. I am glad if someone points out when I do wrong and I appreciate that. I do not want or need praise or being told good things about myself from others. I am able to know inside myself if I have done a good things, which are hopefully for somone else for their benefit. I choose to do good things because I serve God and God wants us to do good things for others, and much more. Life is not about doing what makes us feel good or be happy, it is about doing what is right and serving God. A lot is involved with that also. I choose to be this way, and want to be this way. God knows what is in my heart and thoughts, always.
I have also gone through decades of tons of physical abuse/some sexual/ and plenty of emotional abuse. From that, I learned to turn a lot of myself "off," for safety reasons. I believe that part of me is still turned off to where I can not accept being told anything good about myself. It does not feel real, feels dangerous, (I know that does not make sense), threatening (as if it is opening up the door to abuse fixing to happen--which I also know does not make sense), and is so very upsetting (b/c I know what things like that lead to from very much past experience). For me, with all I have been through, it is a fake, false, trick and alway a lie.
I am sorry I am not able to properly describe this with any sensible meaning to you. I truly am. Please forgive me.
I just like realistic things from people, and it is alright when people need to say bad things to me, as I need to hear those things. Hopefully, if they can be realistic with me, it will be a much bigger help and be so much more accurate.
I am sorry, I can not handle thinking about this anymore now. I have to go. Bye.
@Amelia2324
Hi! I think you explained very well, from my perspective every word had meaning.
As a child I had someone who praised me too much, and it had the effect of me feeling very self-conscious and actuallly avoiding doing anything that would bring praise. I still find myself sometimes wanting to do something secretly while no-one is watching, because I know if people notice it will bring unwanted praise/compliments. And I just want to do the thing for myself, or to contribute in some way, not for attention.
That makes perfect sense that it would feel dangerous if in the past compliments came before abuse. We learn to be wary from our experiences, some of us more than others. We learn mistrust of others and that can keep us safe.
I appreciate you spending time to reply.
@VioletSpringGlade
ViolentSpringGlade, I understanad what you shared. Thanks. Also, thanks for writing back.
@Amelia2324
I hear you completely Amelia. I'm so glad you can maintain these boundaries and share how you feel ❤️❤️
@Olivia210
i know you. i do not want to share how i feel anymore. it is done
@Amelia2324
I hear you and feel you.