Insecurity

@JazzyNRain

What are you afraid of?

@Compassion21 I am afraid he will see the real me and hate her with all my depressin and anxiety and who know what else. I am afraid I am unhealthy him.

@JazzyNRain. I know exactly what you mean, have you told him this? I'm actually in the same position and after two years I still have the same fears as you concerning my mental lack of health and my relationship with my bf. He seems to be growing weary of listening to me and comforting me. I think the main thing is after you have talked to him and he says he will be there, trust him. If he has shown no reason for you to doubt him, then dont, and I know this will be hard but he will appreciate.

@Compassion21 I have talked to him and it seems things have been getting better lately with the help of a few mutual friends now that they kind of know we care for one another. It has been a struggle because our friends did not know we are together so if adds stress to a lot of the insecurities I have feelings like he ia ashamed of me or he wants to keep me hidden to play around. As time passes these things have been shown to be lies.

@JazzyNRain

I'm so glad things r getting better! For me to I've been not just honest but open communication with my man. Why r you keeping your relationship secret? I'm glad your learning to trust, it will mean alot to him. One thing I've told my man is I'm not expecting to solve my problems but just show support sometimes.

@Compassion21 Yes! Now that it is clear when I tell him my fears that I don't want him to fix them things are less turbulent. Our relationship started in a sticky mess he was with a girl who didn't want the kind of commitment he wanted but would not let him go and we kind of fell into feelings. He has friends who liked him too snd expected things to happen so to save the friendship and not isolate us or himself we have not made it official.

@JazzyNRain

Hi! Have you talked to him about your feelings/is he aware this is your first relationship, and that it may therefore cause you some insecurity/anxiety? While it's always terrifying to show someone our true selves, especially in a new relationship when we strive to be perfect, in the long run it's better to be as honest as possible, for their sake and yours. How have you thought of dealing with your insecurity so far?

@WildUnknown indeed I have and he has been so kind and patient and so far from tired of me. I still struggle with seeing that he needs to take tine away for his own self care when I have my boughts with darkness. Recently I told him to leave me because I will kill him with my depression. He didn't say a word and just went to bed; the next day he approached me as if nothing has happened and it really made me see how he faithfully is there for me and not in a way that is coddling me.

@JazzyNRain - Hi there. I was wondering if you were ever made to feel bad in any type of relationship due to the depression and anxiety you might be experiencing? Was it ever from him? From what you are sharing he has been supportive and nice, so it seems as if those insecurities have been formed from other relationships not necessarily romantic ones but also that they are affecting your current relationship, based on what you have shared.