In love with a married man
Help!!! I’m 35 will be 36 in December no kids never married but I’m in love with a married man!!!!! We just became serious the last two years but we’ve known each other over 9 years. He still lives with her but claims the marriage is like living with a roommate. He says he loves me too he does so much for me and my family and he’s a very kind man. I guess my dilemma is I’m getting older & I think I want at least one child. But I don’t want to date anyone else! I feel like if I talked to another man romantically I’d be cheating on him.
It’s so hard finding someone to connect with and open up to— feel vulnerable with. which has me so afraid to date anyone else. Plus I want to be loyal to him. Am I stupid??
@nene1215
Hello Nene,
Thank you for having the courage to tell us of your story through 7Cups, I am sure many others have gone through something similar and from what I’ve seen, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.
I don’t want to focus on your relationship with him as I think you’ve already made your mind up about him and I feel if someone was to say something different, you’d feel even more confused. I would prefer to focus on Nene.
It sounds like your biological clock is ticking and its ticking fast which probably makes you have intense feelings for this man, I do not think you are stupid in any shape of form. I think it’s because you feel extremely vulnerable with him and I’m sure there are butterflies in your stomach constantly thinking about him and what he does for you and your family.
But
There is a risk behind all of this and that is he might decide it’s ‘easier’ to continue the marriage and see you behind his wife’s back, it might be okay for now but what about the long run, are you prepared for that?
All the best
Frenchie
⚫ Quality Mentor ⚫Listener Coach ⚫Forum Supporter ⚫Project Agent
We should always have things in control by ourselves. If you see him as the last straw to save you. You will be disappointed. I experienced this…
Powerful answer! ❤️
Run away from married people. They are not available. They will only cause you pain.
No not stupid but maybe u should sit down with him and find out his true intentions with you and with his wife , don't put yourself on hold for a man that has no intentions with you other then one thing.. and I was always told if a man cheats on someone with you then they will cheat on you as well so please be careful!
they all claim the marriage is on the rocks ... they are just roommates
there is nothing going on between them ....... but they still have family get together and vacations. smile for the camera for photos and the longer it goes the less likely the married person is going to say to spouse .... hey i met someone else X amount of years ago and finally now decide to move on.
if you want a child have you told him?
how does he feel about that .... ? does he already have children?
it is a tough call as most do not work out well and he is committed to someone else so you are a free agent to find someone else.