How much emotional sharing is too much in a relationship?

@sporkchop

Hi, I am so sorry that you going through this. Im not an epert and am just a member but I can relate to the daily struggle of feeling needy and wanting validation and reassurance from my wife and others. The key is open communication with your partner,. Its good that he has reiterated his committment and support to you. Only you can judge what you feel the right balance is but seven cups can certainly help to act as a sounding board to help you make that decision. Whether you discuss in a group chat room or find a listener it might be worth considering discussing whatever your worry at the time is by sharing on feed or forum post, etc and if that doesnt give you peace of mind then speak to him or seek a therapist maybe. The growth path and various regular discussions in the rooms will help build your condience and give you the tools to be able to cope, we all support each other.I am happy to chat to you in the feed, forums or chat rooms if you feel that it might be of some help but Im only a member not a listener. I hope you can find the peace of mind that you are looking for, take care and senfing you virtual comforting hug and hot chocolate :)

I don't know if this would help, but maybe when you feel like you need reassurance that he still loves you, instead of going to him every time, you could write down examples of things the two of you have done together that you enjoyed, and that showed he loves you. For example, maybe you could write about a place the two of you visited together which you really enjoyed. Or a conversation the two of you had where you felt loved and supported by him. This can help remind you that he really loves you, even when you are struggling. I know it's not going to be easy to do this when you are struggling and having moments of doubt, but try persevering with it. You can still speak to him when you are having your doubts, but maybe this way instead of going to him every day, you speak to him once a week or so and the rest of the time you spend reminding yourself of his love.

@sporkchop first of all, am sorry you are going through this, its indeed challenging situation a bit confusing as well for you, but let me try to put my thoughts in a simple way, leaning on him is great thing, expressing your emotions is also great, but too much is not good for you, not healthy and all, as you said yourself so lets head straight to the point, how to balance it, simply, by making it moderate, once or twice a week ( deep conversations ), long ones, is quite great for both of you as a summery of week events, feelings, and during the week itself, handling it on your own is by a lot of ways, but some of it, is to write how you feel on paper <3 , and to meditate, to relax, practice positve thoughts and all <3 if you wish you can always message me, and if am there i will respond instantly if not ASAP, you're doing great <3 try not to worry much <3

@sporkchop

Hi. I think its awesome that you are seeking medical attention for a hormone imbalance, that can make the world of difference. Work with your provider and communicate openly about your thoughts and feelings so they can help you. There is a lot you can do with foods and natural resources to help and that would be worth looking into. We all need validation from time to time, especially in long term relationships. We also can do much on our own to examine our thoughts and feelings (they are linked) to ensure that our thought life is healthy. Be mindful of what you are thinking, which will in turn lead to your feelings and spin round and round in a cycle. Question your thoughts, they are not always accurate. Finally ensure the thoughts that you allow to take root are true. If you are thinking thoughts that are not based in truth correct yourself and try to do so everytime. This over time will change your pattern of thinking. Between working out your hormones and challenging your own thughts, you will seek support and validation from you partner on an as needed basis and not every time you have a challenging thought.

@sporkchop

I am so sorry to hear about your struggle. I also consider myself an emotionally 'needy' person, someone who needs reassurance all the time. However, I also understand that it can put a strain on relationships. You are really blessed to have a boyfriend who doesn't feel like you are pushing him away and is happy to give you reassurances. However, he is also very honest in asking you to learn handling your emotions on your own.
What I've learned is that when we are anxious or worried, our mind feeds us with lies. I know it is difficult, but maybe you could question your thoughts when you feel insecure? Try to find out evidence that he really does love you. I think another way to deal with insecurity is to work on yourself, work at being the best version of you, groom yourself, find out your hobbies and passions and nurture them.
It's a good think that you will be receiving treatment for your hormonal imbalance. I hope things get better for you. :)

@sporkchop I am going through something like this too. But I just moved to a different state. I have no friends here. My two main friends back home i just dont trust them to be there for me and now my relationship is taking a toll because i either talk too much or dont talk enough. but we have come to conclusion that i just need to talk but they also admit that while they understand that they are all i got that it really bothers them that i only come to them for support. so now i am desperate and just wish someone would be my friend because i hate this as much as she does and i just want to be healthy for her. How do i make friends? I can't drive. I haven't learned where the hid outs are yet. All I got is the mall and the library. Sure i have other friends from back home but i am not on that level with them that i can talk about my problems with them. they are just the sort of friends you have fun with and thats it.