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How do you get a relationship if you don't feel any love/attraction?

Djeidi August 15th, 2022

And also why do I still want one despite not being able to experience love, attraction or any real attachment?

Many people think I'm actually "lucky" go be this way but hoesntly I think I'm cursed and I hate when they say that. They just don't understand that it just makes me feel like less of a human for not feeling something that's literally a common trait for everyone. On top of that like I stated earlier the lack of those feelings doesn't mean I don't want a relationship either. It just makes things 100 times harder.

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SweetPea321 August 15th, 2022

Are you talking only about romantic love or can you not feel love for your family too?

2 replies
Djeidi OP August 16th, 2022

@SweetPea321 family too

1 reply
SweetPea321 August 17th, 2022

Ok, you stumped me. I was expecting just romantic. Your situation is more unique. Are you able to at least care about others? How about yourself...do you care about yourself? That could be a start.

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toughTiger6481 August 16th, 2022

If you find someone like you that really does not want more.... but other then that you could probably fake it but that would only last through the start of one.


Screen77 August 16th, 2022

I can only share my experience with it, as someone is the same as you. I feel no love or attachment to family as well, and I've never been attracted to anyone all my life.


I got into a relationship a few months ago because they asked me on a date, then they asked me out. I considered asking them out but took so long they ended up doing it. I tried to do all the things a partner should do; I texted often, made pushes to spend time with them when I had a chance, bought them gifts, payed for dinner occasionally, and though I did say I was very inexperienced and nervous with relationships I tried to be more physically affectionate, slowly getting used to kisses ans hugs.


TL;DR we broke up, they thought they weren't good enough for me (which was ironic considering I had the exact same thoughts at some point), we both had issues and didn't feel we could, or wanted to, confide in the other because they had enough on their plate already. During the relationship I felt nothing but guilt at the thought they'd chose me and seemed to give compliments to me so easily whilst I couldn't feel any attraction to them and had to go out my way to say nice things to seem like a good partner. It felt cheap to me, and fake. After all, who would want to find out their partner doesn't really feel any attraction to them?


I'm not saying you'll feel the same. And I wasn't really looking for a relationship at the time, so it'll be different if you actually want one. But my insecurities got the best of me and it fell apart. You just have to find the right person and communicate with them.

ElenaGeneris August 24th, 2022

@Djeidi

I read somewhere, "We all are a little weird and when our weirdness matches someone we call it love."

I hope you find someone compatible with your weirdness soon😊.

Try to connect to listeners on 7 cups. I am sure it will help you.

Hugs!


I experience the same but i have had a bad experience with a serious relationship and now i cant love anyone. I dont feel attracted to anyone i dont feel the real bond with anyone. I dont know how to change this