I'm confused (kinda). Please Help me!

Hi ! I am 17 year old. 2023 was one of the most disturbing year of my life. I had depression, crushes and what not. But since December I've been working like a cog in a machine. I'm studying all day with just 4 hours of sleep Along with *** teachers who just make me more confused (I wish that I could punch him in face) 

I don't enjoy my life, nor do I like it. 

Now to my main thing, I had a crush. and she left me because probably I'm a weirdo. Now I feel no attraction to any girls whatsoever. Let me give you an example, recently my friend said that he thinks that girl named, say XYZ is beautiful. Then I checked her out, Well she was infact better looking. But weirdly My inner voice said that if she is beautiful, then she is probably stupid. 

I feel no attraction whatsoever now. I have a female friend. And her friends are mine too. When Bunch of Incel like students came to me, One of them said that I am a "Laundiya-baaz" ie a womanizer. And I was in shock for a second. because My inner voice tells me that No girl would ever talk to me for "that".

Anyways I am kind of confused. I feel lonely. despite having friends. My parents are like typical Indian/asian parents, so they don't really help me in anything. I wish that I had a gf, but then my inner voice says that " apurva, is that really important from your exam this sunday?"