Handling defensiveness in relationships
@sociableSail5480
It is easy to get defensive with a person when we are doing any self improvement ... especially if there has been a past issue ......
It is hard for others to show support without a tinge of defensiveness ....
i have learned to smile thank people and take it in a positive way instead of letting my feeling of ... i have a long way to go... or i do not feel or see it holding me back.
Until your feel positive about your goals or progress i would avoid discussing it.... no matter how nicely it is done.
@toughTiger6481 Thanks for your answer. Would you say that's ok in a relationship? I want him to talk to me about anything and I feel bad if there is something we need to keep off the table because we are both very open.
I know when I feel good about my weight I will tell him things without him even asking and I will feel so much better about it too.
@sociableSail5480
It is fine to let each other know your limits on discussions and no topic is off limits just proceed with caution.
I can see how asking "how are you doing at the gym?" could be triggered and feel like maybe he is nagging you.. I think it's ok if you don't want to talk about it.
Is there some positive way he could support you, like encouraging words of affirmation "you're doing great, just do your best, I'm proud of you, etc" or maybe making you a protein smoothie or something.
