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I am beginning to see why she have trouble making friends
Summershy October 31st, 2023
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I belong to another online forum for individuals who are autistic and I happened to stumble upon a thread where one woman said she had trouble making friends.  So I tried to make some suggestions to her about where she could make friends and she wasn't interested.   Regardless, we decided to connect.  She also connected me with her social media page. 

I tried being nice to her and tell her that I was sorry that she had trouble making friends. I also told her that she looked like a neat person and that there was something wrong with them.  Well the next thing is that she got upset and started accusing me making assumptions about her.  She also told me that she had two friends in real life.

Additionally, I had asked her if she had heard of two autistic self-advocacy groups and that they would like her.  Again, she took everything the wrong  way.  "Just to make friends?  What do you mean these groups may like you?"

So I told her today, "Ok, I will not make any other suggestions."  I also don't feel like being her friend after that. 


5
Summershy OP October 31st, 2023
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@Summershy

She also threw it in there, "You don't even know me," which is true I don't.  However, my thoughts are, "Then don't come crying to me." 

toughTiger6481 November 1st, 2023
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@Summershy

Sadly some people just like to complain and do not really want help or suggestions.   there is always something wrong with any innocent suggestion you may give and become angry with whatever person honestly thought they could help or offer suggestions 

Sounds like you found one of them. 

Summershy OP November 2nd, 2023
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I have an update:


You are right , she likes to complain about everything. She criticized me for making compliments on her social media pictures. Her reasons? She has low self-esteem.


Today I set boundaries with her, by first acknowledging her. Then I told her that I would like to get to know her but not if she is going to criticize me all the time and that I wasn’t comfortable with the way she was talking to me.

Summershy OP November 1st, 2023
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I agree. However, she was frustrated with me because she felt like I made assumptions about her when I didn’t know her.


She also reminded me that we are not friends yet and wants us to get to know each other.

Hopeprovider6771 August 23rd
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@Summershy It sounds like you were trying to be helpful and supportive, but your intentions were misunderstand It's frustrating when your efforts are met with hostility or defensiveness It's important to remember that everyone experiences social interactions differently, and what might be helpful for one person may not be for another.

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