"Friendship" is over and I need answers.
This friendship I thought I had with a girl is essentially over. It pretty much suddenly ended when she started seeing someone and pushed me away. I tried over the past 3 weeks to see if we could make it work. I want to know exactly what happened and how I can avoid something like this happening again. She had been closed off about talking face-to-face about things when I was trying to keep the friendship. I need to do this to move on and I'm tempted to just show up at her place to force the issue. (no intention of doing anything violent) I do have a dart board at her place that I want back. Should I insist she let me talk about it? What if she refuses?
@tryingnottobeahermit
Hey there.
I'm sorry that this happened. Having people not be willing to provide closure or talk about any past issues, can be frustrating and disheartening.
Seeing as you don't know specifically why she cut off contact, it can be tricky to figure out whether or not you should approach her. Do you know if she has cut off contact other friends too, or just you? Seeing as you don't know what's going on in her life right now, there could be many factors as to why this has happened.
If you want to approach her, then the worst that could come from it is her refusing again, and if you can handle that, then it may be worth a shot. If she doesn't want to talk face to face, you could try ringing or texting her clearly about your feelings. However, it does seem like she isn't wanting to contact you, and if she does, she has the means to do so, so you could also leave it up to her too.
I don't think it is much use pondering ( even though this would be a natural reaction right now) to what you did wrong, because you can't be sure that you even did anything wrong in the first place.
Again, I'm sorry this happened, but you sound like you really cared about this friendship, and so it's okay to be hurt by this.
Take care <3
@EtherealJulia, @cantbehelped Thanks for the kind words.
I left a letter on her door asking to talk. I don't think I did anything wrong and beleive this is primarily on her end. Hope she will let me talk, if not I will just have to figure out how to put it behind me.
The hardest part is that we work at the same place in different departments. I've been on a leave of absence from work since right before everything fell apart and start back next monday. This is uncharted territory for me and I honestly don't know how I will react to her if she will not communicate with me over this. The good end of this is that she will only have 3 weeks left at that point (temp position).
Believe I have mostly put this behind me at this point and it will soon be over.