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just venting

bertnayb February 18th, 2022

It's really late. I'm sad and anxious and cant sleep. My boyfriend who i live with broke up a

with me over the weekend and we got back together by the end of the weekend. It was a really tough weekend with lots of anger, screaming, crying, etc.

right now, he's being standoffish. I went to send my mom a cute video on Facebook and he saw a guys name below her name and a few minutes later asked me who that guy was. I was like, a guy on Facebook. I dont know, I never met him, but we had mutual friends and blah blah. And then the jealous not talking to me or touching me or even so much as being friendly towards me starts. So, we're currently on opposite sides of the bed, facing away from each other because he's constantly mad that men exist in the world besides him.

we've gotten in fights before over guys i havent talked to since even before he and i started our talking phase. He just cannot stand that anyone with a penis has spoken to me before. It really bothers me because I'm occasionally friendly with people of the opposite sex who I used to be friends with. I was messaging a guy a few weeks ago who I used to work with about how I moved away and he was telling me about his struggles with his restaurant he opened up and his place flooded, etc. but if he saw us messaging he would give me the cold shoulder for days until he eventually blows up yelling at me because i'm a whore or something. When I live in his house and dont leave unless its to see my parents.

i dont know. I'm sick with anxiety about it. Starting to feel like this is abusive but if I say that... he'll break up with me again.


:/

3
neonSkies1441 February 18th, 2022

I know you probably love him but to an outsider that doesn’t sound like a safe and supportive relationship. I know the idea of being alone is scary but being with the wrong person can be worse than being alone. I hope you have some people who can support you. Sending positive vibes for you and hope you can be happy.

2 replies
bertnayb OP February 18th, 2022

It's just tough because every guy I date seems so good and perfect and all of a sudden it turns sour over nothing. We broke up this weekend because I wouldn't let him play video games bc I wanted to spend time with him bc I wasn't feeling too happy. When before our relationship was perfect and everyone I know was confused and upset that we were having so many issues all of a sudden.

i dont know how to find the perfect person if they lie up until they have me in their grasp (i live here, i have no job, etc) and then they become assholes. It's not like I even did anything wrong. I'm worried he's going to force me to cut myself off from the world. I'm already completely confined to the house.

1 reply
neonSkies1441 February 18th, 2022

I think every relationships has ups and downs. You need to ask yourself if the ups are worth the downs. With one boyfriend I used to put a cross on the calendar every day he made me cry. When I saw all those crosses it made me realise it wasn’t right. And if you’re with the wrong guy then you’re not available when the right guy comes along. No one will be perfect, including you. Because we’re all human. Just try to work out if you are happier more than you are sad. Also if you can’t be happy on your own it’s a really powerful thing, because you’re no longer dependent on someone else for your happiness. And you know that whatever happens, you’ll be ok. Sending strength and positivity

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