Should you delete pictures together?

@amberm824 16 months is a long time. I would wait to decide what to do with the pictures until you're hurting less. Deleting them might make you feel better now, but when the hurt goes away you may want to look back on those memories.

@amberm824 I am in a similar situation... so many pictures of us together. And like you said he was my best friend too. I have not been able to delete them. Quite frankly I don't want to. Not because I'm holding on to hope, or nastolgia, but because when I am fully healed from all of this I know I will look back on our time together as a growing and learning experience. I have learned so much about myself, love, and relationships because of him.

@amberm824 Just thoughts... you have a lot of strong (in in some cases perhaps unnecessarily judgmental?) feelings about whether or not to keep pictures. You say that keeping them would be "wrong." In what way would that seem "wrong" to you? The times you shared were a part of your life and it seems to me that it's your right to hold on to whatever mementos of that time you wish to keep, including pictures. And if you're worried about what anyone else seeing them might think, it seems to me explaining that he is your ex is all anyone could possibly ask.

You also say deleting them would be "childish and petty." Assuming what you're deleting is on an account that you own, I see nothing childish or petty about it. If the pictures make you feel bad, removing them strikes me as wise and healthy, not childish and petty!

This may seem like an unsolvable dilemma to you - as you described things, you're forced either to be "childish and petty" or to do something "wrong." You might want to think about why you framed things this way. If you had a friend going through a similar breakup would you say she was wrong if she kept old pictures? Would you say she was childish and petty if she decided she didn't want the pictures anymore? Perhaps you can find ways to be a friend to yourself in the way you talk about this situation and your understandably mixed feelings about the pictures.

@JBlue Wow that helps a lot. I didn't even realize I was judging my every move like that. I guess I still have a lot to work through before I make a decision.

@amberm824

There is a middle way. You can bury them in an obscure file on the cloud. You can put them on a thumb drive, stick it in a shoe box or an evelope with a letter of what you'd like to say, and leave it with someone you trust but don't live with. Just ideas. Sorry you're hurting. It will get better.