Mental Illness and separation - how to move on.
After 14 years of marriage and 16 years together I had to end what can only be described as a toxic marriage. My mental illness was used as an excuse for the fact that she did not want to try in our relationship. Four months on I am ready to start again but the interference from the ex-wife is making it hard. Is 4 months not long enough or do I just need to address the ex. I am happy to disclose my illness at the right time but the first date certainly isn't that time.
Would love some advice and discussions.
Hello, @determinedHemlock5620
I think it's so good that you made this step forward and that you are determined to move on! :) after a 16 years relationship 6 months might not seem long enough but if you feel that you're really ready and not doing it just for the sake of finding comfort there's no reason why it should be too soon. If you're ex is causing you trouble I'd suggest you confront her on this, but rather make it genuine and honest so that she can truly understand what you want and feel about it.
Talk about it
@determinedHemlock5620
What sort of interference is coming from your ex?
@determinedHemlock5620
It is up to you to decide how long is long enough.
I am in a severe state of depression , anxiety and fear that the love of my life will not take me back. 4 days ago else suddenly broke up with me after I had a bout of insecurity and paranoia. About her cheating. She has been a problem for about a month now. She was patient at first. But had had enough and doesn't want to be in a toxic relationship. She still loves me and had made statements saying she won't change her mind. But then also has said what if we don't. I don't want to hurt you more. We were so happy even talking about having a baby. The day before the breakup. There were no signs of her doing this. I am making and have make significant steps and changes in the past four days. I feel that this slap in the face has opened my eyes and I will no longer act that way and we can go back to ho we were. I'm just so saddened and heartbroken. Fearful that she won't come back. She has asked for space. But yesterday and today has texted me a few brief times. I'm at such a loss on how to get her back and get her to believe me that taking me back will not be a mistake
@Jmpe22 I can relate somewhat to your situation. I had two bouts of depression which caused me to break up with a guy twice, when I should've talked to him first. I regret that... I feel awful. I know that my body was telling me something though, perhaps that something is off and he's not right for me. We're not together and I am still having a hard time getting over him although I am better.
I wish you the best getting through this.
